behind these eyes by lexx (sight word books .TXT) 📕

I looked down at my wrists, and the hand prints left on them from Jason's last outburst. The sound of scuffling scared me and i jolted my head up to see Harley my husky wolf mix shifting positions in his bed, He looked up at me as if he was asking if i was okay. Nodding let him know everything was okay. Harley's the only one who keeps me sane in this house. He try's his best to protect me from Jason and keep me from crying when my moms falling all over the house, high as a kite. I was so deep in thought that i hardly noticed Harley was standing in front of me facing the door and growling, that's when i knew Jason was coming. Hurrying as fast as i possibly could i stood up, limped quickly and got in bed pulling the covers up to my neck hoping he thought i was just sleeping. My door opened fast and with a bang, i tried my hardest to remain still as possible. Harley was growling from the foot of my bed and i knew he was showing all those big ass teeth of his. Then i heard it, Jason gave Harley his German commands to sit and He obeyed shifting his eyes to me. He was trained so excessively he couldn't resist his commands or he'd face punishment, i couldn't blame him, it was me or him that was going to get the beating id rather take it for my best friend. Just before i could move my ankle was grabbed and i was yanked straight out of my bed and onto the floor Jason quickly on top of me screaming about what a stupid kid i was, i was trying my best to not flinch to give him the satisfaction of scaring me but i couldn't help it. Tears started to form at the edges of my eyes and he smiled a evil looking grin and looked down at me repeating, "is little Amanda afraid" he pinned my wrists to the floor and inched close to my face, i could smell the alcohol from his breath as he whispered "good, she should be" quietly. Harley was growling lightly from his spot on the other side of the room and Jason snapped up yelling SHUT UP once and Harley looked down at me as if he was begging me to be okay, then growled again. Jason stood up so fast and was headed straight for him when i latched onto his leg and pulled him to the ground as hard as i could. He looked at me shocked as i yelled "LEAVE HIM ALONE". standing up you could see the heat coming off of him, he was surely pissed. He grabbed me by the back of my neck pulling me from the floor and tossed me against the wall pinning me there, he just kept repeating "you will regret that". I tried my best to not look at him but he kept forcing me too. Out of no where i felt a pain in my rib cage and realized he was hitting me over and over again. I gasped at the shooting pain through my body and begged for him to stop, looking at my brother the person who was supposed to protect me. He was nothing but a monster..


CHAPTER 2

It was dark by the time i awoke, I instantly felt surging pain through my body and i knew something was wrong. I sat up and touched the dry blood that was leading from my mouth, standing up slowly i could feel my ribs throbbing. It took all my strength to get up and turn on my shower i sat under the beating water for at least 30mins before i got out and decided to go lay down. I reached for my phone and texted Ryan (my best friend) letting him know that Jason had flipped out on me again. Within a minute i received a text back "ill be there in five minute's open your window" stumbling to the window seel i popped it open and stumbled to the chair and sat there trying to breath slowly from the pain. I heard a light cough and i knew he was here, before i could even move he was coming through my window with his backpack full of clothes and bandages. Once again Ryan stayed and helped clean all my wounds, he did this every single time Jason got pissed. I winced at the pain as he dabbed alcohol on my arm, he sighed heavily "he shouldn't get away with this Amanda, someone needs to do something.. like me" he said standing up abruptly. Ryan is tall at least 5'9 he has dark hair and these crystal brown eyes. i stuttered "no-no you can't he'll hurt you" i touched his arm lightly. he gently grabbed me and carried me to my bed and layed me down, laying down next to me and wrapping his arms around me. "i would rather it be me than you Amanda" he sighed kissing my neck lightly. "go to sleep love, im here im here to protect you" he whispered and before i could even reply i was deep in my dreams. I woke up screaming at 4am, the bad dreams always hit me hardest around that time. Ryan protectively wrapped his arms tightly around me to comfort me and thats when i heard the foot steps i sat up fast and told him to hide. Ryan slid under my bed, Jason came striding into my room with a bottle in his hand slurring his words "where-er is heee" he hissed at me. " Who, i just had a bad dream what're you talking about?" He walked over to my bed and grabbed me by my hair and got in my face. I yelped quietly and i could feel Ryan shifting under my bed. Jason tightened his grip and told me to shut up or i would regret it. I tried but every time he moved my body moved and the pain in my ribs was to much to handle. Before i could protest i was hit in the face and fell back onto my bed and tried to shield myself. He slurred a few more words at me and walked out of the room, i quietly listened while he stomped down the stairs and into his room, before i allowed the tears to fall.

Chapter 3.

It was less then a few seconds later when i felt Ryan climb onto my bed and cradle me in his arms. His soothing words and protective arms had me calmed down within minutes. He just kept repeating "im sorry, im so so sorry i didn't protect you". I sighed and looked up at him, "you can't always protect me love" he leaned down and kissed me lightly on the lips. I didn't hesitate to kiss him back. We always knew we had more than just 'friendship' feelings towards each other and he finally acted on it a few months ago. we aren't "together" but he say's im all he wants and he sure is hell all i want. we layed and talked for awhile while he ran his fingers through my hair and before i realized it was day light. I told him to sneak out the window and meet me outside. I got dressed in skinny jeans and a sweat shirt to hide the bruises and ran down the stairs and ran directly into jason. "Where do you think you're going?" he blurted out. i scanned through my thoughts quickly and stuttered "uh- the -the uhm the store we're out of some stuff we need" He sat and looked at me and then nodded his head. I walked around him carefully and then out the front door. I was free.. for a few hours at least. we spent a few hours just walking in the park holding hands, his arms around me. For the first time in months i felt safe and happy. It all came to an abrupt end when i receive a furious call from jason i stalled him by saying i had to run to another store for milk. We rushed to the nearest gas station and bought milk and i went home. Walking quietly into the house trying to shut the door silently. I looked around, no sight of Jason anywhere. Thats when i heard a loud squeal and my head started spinning. all i could do was stand there and shake, until it hit me.. Harley. I went running up the stairs skipping them two to three at a time. Rushing into my room i saw Harley laying motionless on the ground and Jason over him, I started screaming and rushed towards Jason hitting him as hard as i could. He grabbed me by my arm and yanked me towards the bed. I started struggling, screaming doing anything i could to just get to Harley. I saw he was still breathing so i kept fighting. Until everything went black and i was falling to the floor.


Chapter 4.

I woke up on the bed with my clothes ripped, i was bruised and i knew Jason had taken it to a whole new level.. The whole way. I cried as i looked down at my shorts on the ground. I pulled sweats on and ran over to Harley begging for him to be okay. He glanced up at me, and i grabbed his head and started whispering things to him " please be okay, im so sorry i wasn't here to take the beating you don't deserve this.. please don't leave me here Harley please " I picked him up even though he weighs almost as much as me, calling Ryan as i was walking out the door. We rushed him to the vet but we were to late. Harley died in my arms on the way to the vet's office. I laid there and held his head in my arms asking him to come back to me. I returned home hours later, on my own. Jason was waiting in the living room. When i saw him all these emotions hit me i went running full force at him grabbed the dinner chair and chucked it at him, screaming "YOU KILLED HIM". He grabbed me by my arms and started to tighten his grip until i got quiet, "he deserved it you little bitch" he whispered. I looked up at him and before i could move he started laughing saying "your on your own now, that'll make things so much easier", i stuttered "no, there's mom" he looked at me and cracked a huge grin. " if you think she'll protect you, you're crazy all she cares about is that little happy drug of hers ". i tried to think of something to reply with but he was absolutely right i was all alone, stuck with a monster. I pulled away from him and started up the stairs when he grabbed my wrist and yanked hard. he looked up at me and said "ill see you later tonight" and with that he winked at me and turned around towards his bedroom. I ran up the stairs slamming my door and collapsing on my bed, i glanced over at Harley's bed and his bowls, i instantly started to sob, I felt arms go around me and pull me to his chest, i fell into Ryan's arms and cried for hours. All i could think was "im on my own now" Ryan must have sensed what i was thinking cause he tightened his grip and