lovely insanity by Jessica R. (pdf e book reader txt) 📕

I don't even remember how I got here. I don't remember what I did to deserve to be taken here. I do know one thing though and it's that they caused it...the so called voices in my head. No one believes me whenever I tell them I tell them that they are actual beings, well not humanly beings but beings from another dimension...another world all together. Their haunting voices are always running through my mind, even when I'm being force my fed my so called "helping" pills. The only thing those pills cause is for the "voices" to tell me things, things i wouldn't in a million years ever think of doing. The pills don not help at all and because of that everyone thinks I am beyond help, so not even the other patients,the actual crazy ones, will not speak to me. I don't really care though, since coming here I have tried avoiding people, just try to stay away from them in general. I just do not want the "voices" coming up with another idea of how to hurt someone. Sometimes I begin to wonder if they kill to enjoy or just kill to kill. I just spend most of my time in my room, thinking, just trying to remember what I did to end up here. There are so many possibilities.
My therapist thinks that seeing her more often than other patients will help, but I think it's just a bunch of bull. As i stare out my window someone knocks on my door. "Hey Raven, it's that time again." said nurse Higenns. Personally I think she is the nicest nurse in this place cause she actually gives me a chance to take my pills by myself. The voices really do not like her. I think its cause she is nice to me, and since they really don't like her it makes me fear they might hurt her. Who knows what the voices might do, even I don't know.

I'm basicly a mute now. Before I came here you would have a hard time getting me to be quiet for five minutes, but now...words seem pointless. I take in a shaky breathe and walk over to Mrs.Higenns for my medicine. As I take the cup that has my pill in it Mrs.Higenns pulls out a bottle of orange juice. She's the only one in this horrid place that knows what I like. I pop the pill in my mouth and take a swig of the orange juice to help wash away the nasty bitter taste. I mouth thank you to Mrs.Higenns and she exits my room. I plop back down in my spot in front of the window. I'm not really allowed to have sharp objects such as pencils but Mrs.Higenns always find away to me get me some drawing materials. I pull the materials out of the hiding spot, which is a lose brick in the wall. I have always loved drawing, I don't know why. I can never control what I draw. It's like my hand just moves in the direction it needs to without me telling it to. As I watch what I'm drawing I notice that it is the landscape that is outside my window but with subtle differences, like a person standing in front of the dense forest. I begin to draw faster and then I notice that the person standing in front of the forest is a guy, and from the style of the clothes is about my age which is seventeen. i abruptly stop drawing and i just stare at my now complete drawing. The drawing has lots of dark shades so I'm guessing it takes place at night. The picture also has a full moon in the back ground and if I'm correct there is a full moon tonight. This should be interesting.

Publication Date: 06-16-2012

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