Reality Lies by D.F. Downey (e manga reader .TXT) 📕

Reality Lies

d.f.downey

Pops…

finally free

Written Spring 2002, published Summer 2011

Copyright 2011 - All rights reserved. No part of this publication can be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system or transmitted in any way or by any means electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise without the prior permission of the author 

“Mommy, hurry up. I want to go to school!” The young boy pleaded as he walked, his face flushed with excitement.

“Be patient honey, don’t get too far ahead. We’ll be there soon.” his mother beamed.

He ran off anyway. He was a big boy now and this was his first day of big boys’ school. He couldn’t wait. Still, Johanna was anxious but not for the traditional reasons. Jay was “different”. Not special or gifted or any of those other semantics, just different. She had never been able to articulate what these differences were but they existed at the periphery of her reality. But what would happen now when Jay finally met world.

“Mommy, keep up! I see the school! C’mon mommy! C’mon!”

“Okay Jay, I’m right behind you.”

The other women from the neighborhood had gone together. When Jay was first born Johanna had been one of them. “Sharing the journey together.” as Laura had put it. But she had drifted from them as Jay’s difference had manifested itself. Little things, a child’s toy come to life, large things, a face changed to abstraction. At first, these events had been temporary but as time went on their duration grew. The one element they had in common was Jay and his perception of the change as it occurred. She had realized this early on and accordingly, withdrew him from interaction with other children. She had used a variety of excuses. He’s sick, he’s allergic to dogs, we’re going somewhere. Until, one by one, the invites stopped coming.

But school was here and try as she might she could not dissuade him from his desire to go.

“Mommy, why does that lady have the funny thing on her face?”

The woman did have something strange on her face. Much to her relief it appeared to be something appropriate.

“Mommy, can I play with the other boys?” He pleaded as he tugged on her hand.

She reflected for a moment then relaxed her hold, “Sure honey. Play nice.”

“Okay!” he sang as he ran off to join a bunch of kids from the neighborhood. He recognized them from watching from his bedroom window.

“Johanna! Long time no see.” It was Debbie Rubin, who lived across the street.

“Jay is feeling well enough to go to school, huh?”

“Um, yeah.” She had been so preoccupied with worry that she had forgotten about the inevitable curiosity of the neighbors.

“That’s good. He’ll finally have a chance to get to know my Michael. Maybe we could have a play date after school.”

Johanna glanced after Jay and saw that he seemed to be getting along with the other boys. “Oh sure, that would be nice.”

A couple of the other woman had joined them. “Johanna, how are you? You look great!” gushed the taller of the two, Jackie D’Angelo. “You look like you’ve lost weight. Jay must be keeping you busy.”

“Yes, he’s a handful.” She was beginning to relax. ‘See, nothing is happening. He’s doing just fine.’ she thought. She was enjoying the company of other women. She hadn’t realized how much she had missed it. She had grown so isolated, so depressed, so desperate. This was wonderful.

Just then, they were interrupted. Robbie came running, crying his eyes out. “Mommy! ...Mommy!” Jackie took him by the shoulders. “Jay!” he was inconsolable.

“Jay? Jay what?”

Johanna grew tense. ‘I should have known this wouldn’t work.’ she thought.

“He took my pencil and he won’t give it back.” Robbie said

“Are you sure that’s what happened?”

“Well I was showing him my pencil and I gave it to him and he put it in his pocket.” he sobbed intermittently as he spoke.

“Jay, come over here!” ordered Johanna. Jay came bounding over. “Did you take Robert’s pencil?”

“No.” She looked at him sternly. “He gave it to me.”

“Did he tell you he wanted it back?”

“Yes, but he gave it to me! A present is a present!”

“Jay, give Robert back his pencil right now!”

Jay dutifully did as he was told.

“Now tell him you’re sorry.”

“I’m sorry Robert.” They shook hands.

“Now go back and get on line, the school bell is about to ring.”

The two boys ran off with nary a backwards glance.

A nervous moment passed before anyone felt comfortable enough to speak. “Boys!” Jackie expelled the words. “Always getting into it. You don’t get that with girls.”

“I know what you mean.” agreed Debbie, “My daughter and her friends can play for hours with me hardly noticing them.”

Johanna nodded, happy that the moment had passed. She took the risk. “I’ve heard that changes a bit when they become teenagers. The girls become a lot more troublesome.” There was a pause, momentarily she wished she had remained a simpleton, bobbing her head.

Thankfully, Debbie agreed, “I’ve heard that too. Still, one thing at a time, for now little girls seem to be the better bargain.”

“Agreed.” They joined in a group chuckle.

“Johanna, me and Debbie are going to get a cup of coffee at Friendly’s. Want to join us?” Jackie asked.

“Um, sure. 0h wait, I have to get back to the house and …”

They looked at her.

She realized to her embarrassment, “No I don’t. It’s gonna take some getting used to not having Jay around during the day.”

“Don’t worry, you get used to it.” Jackie assured.

She smiled. She had forgotten how much she missed adult company.

“Okay class, we’re going to do something fun!” Ms. Nolan reached into one of the tubs under the activity table. She pulled out several colorful pails as well as a variety of molds and plastic knives. “We’re going to use our imagination and see what we can come up with. Think of your favorite thing in the whole world. Do you have a picture of it in your imagination?” The children nodded enthusiastically. “Okay, I’m going to put out these buckets of modeling clay and you’re gonna try and create what you see in your mind.”

“What if we can’t see anything?” Sally blurted out.

“Sally, before you can ask a question, you have to raise your hand.”

Sally sat down and raised her hand. Ms. Nolan called on her. “Yes, Sally?”

“What if we can’t see anything?”

“Well Sally think about the world around you. Do you have a favorite flower or a favorite animal?”

“I like cats!” Sally answered hopefully.

“Think about cats. Now do you have one pictured in your mind?”

Sally sat for a moment with her eyes clamped tight shut. Then she suddenly shouted, “Yes I can Ms. Nolan!”

“Okay Sally, calm down, very good!” she smiled as she said it. She loved this enthusiasm. This is why she taught kindergarten. “Now all you have to do is shape the clay to match what you see.”

Sally dove into the bucket taking bits of every color and went right to work.

Jay was hard at it as well. His tongue was sticking out between his teeth. He always did this when he was concentrating on something.

“I’m going to make a butterfly.” Jay announced to Ms. Nolan as she made the rounds of all the children.

“That’s nice Jay, I’m sure you’ll make a lovely butterfly.”

“Yes and it’s going to fly!”

She smiled as she thought of a gentle way to inform him that this wasn’t going to happen. “Jay, this is an imaginary butterfly. It will fly only in your imagination.”

“No, it’s really going to fly!” He insisted

“Okay Jay, if you think it will fly, it will fly.” She touched him on the shoulder then moved on.

Jay used every color available as the butterfly took form. Sally came over to look. “What’s that?” She asked.

“It’s a butterfly!” Jay proudly announced.

“It doesn’t look like a butterfly. It’s too fat.” Sally decided.

“It’s a fat butterfly!” Jay declared happily.

Sally started pounding on it. “I’ll make it skinny.”

“No, leave it alone! You’ll hurt it.”

Ms. Nolan came over to mediate. “Sally, why don’t you go back to your own seat and finish up.”

“I’m finished.”

“Well then, let’s look at what you did.”

Jay was glad she was gone. Now he could finish his butterfly. It would be the best butterfly anyone ever made.

They had been at it for about an hour when Ms. Nolan announced it was time to tidy up. “OK class, let’s look at what we’ve done. Who wants to go first?”

A dozen tiny hands rose in waving excitement.

“Sally, why don’t you go first.” Sally jumped up and practically ran to the front of the class.

“So what did you make Sally?”

Sally wrapped her hands across her back as she fidgeted back and forth, then gushed. “My cat, Jericho.”

Sally had long light brown curly hair, lively blue eyes and a face afield with freckles. She had cute rounded baby teeth and an infectious smile. A white velvet headband kept her hair from her face. A blue and red plaid jumper with a white collar wrapped this delightful, joyful package.

“Hold Jericho up for the class to see.” Ms. Nolan instructed. Jericho was basically two big lumps of multicolored clay. The ears were plopped to one side of the head and the eyes, akimbo, had been gouged into the head.

Some of the class laughed. “That’s not a cat!” yelled