Fairy Tail: Dawn of Change by Melissa Nichols (books to read for self improvement txt) 📕

Glancing up at the board, he read the menu to Roxanne, who absorbed his every word. He gave her a rough idea of how the shop operated, and then he asked her questions about her favorite ingredients or her favorite bread, favorite drink. And he felt really stupid. She was his apprentice; shouldn't he have at least tried to figure this kind of thing out before? Shouldn't their first day have been spent getting properly acquainted, getting to know each other better? Had he been rushing things with her training because of his own inadequacies?

Roxanne was oblivious to Gray's frustration. He calmly and patiently helped her figure out her order, even though he ordered for her when it was their turn. Roxanne smiled, seeing the understated compassion and consideration that she'd always loved, first-hand. It was all she could do to keep herself in check. If she hadn't, she probably would have melted into a puddle of squeals.

In addition to ordering, he also carried her tray and picked out a two-seater table a bit of a ways away from the rest of the crowd.

"Why this table, Gray?" she asked curiously as she sat down across from him.

"Because it's the most advantageous, I suppose." He handed her the sandwich she'd ordered.

Roxanne frowned. "What's advantageous?" Actually, she already knew what it meant, but she didn't think most kids her age would, especially not if they were really sheltered like she was supposed to be.

"It's when there are advantages, or perks, to a situation. Like, see how we're in a corner with no windows? That means that nobody can sneak up behind me. And I have a perfect view of the windows, the front door, the cash registers and a bit of the kitchen so I can see a lot that happens. And that's important to me, because we're probably the only mages here, and you're just starting out, so it's up to me to protect everyone if something bad were to happen. From my seat, I can see trouble coming and stop it before anyone gets hurt." It was important that a new mage like Roxanne understand a mage's responsibilities, as well as the rush and excitement of magic itself.

"Oh." Roxanne took a bite of her sandwich, thinking about that. "I get it." She'd thought that he was probably watching the door, but she hadn't thought it through that far. That's another piece of Gray that wasn't shown in the anime, she thought to herself as she took a bite of the sandwich. Why does he feel the need to protect everyone? …Oh, right. She almost smacked herself, she felt so stupid. Of course he'd feel like he needed to protect people, because he thought he hadn't protected his parents or Ur from Deliora. Roxanne knew that there was nothing Gray could have done—except maybe not go running headlong to confront a giant, dangerous demon created by the Dark Mage Zeref—to prevent the deaths of his parents and his mentor. She knew that, and she knew that he probably knew that, now that he was grown up. But just knowing it didn't mean he wasn't still hurt by what had happened. He felt responsible for others' safety now, and he probably always would, and it wasn't a bad thing.

I'm safe. Roxanne smiled up at Gray, something sharp inside melting, just a little. She still missed her friends and family, and being away from them still hurt, but… even if Jacob couldn't be there for her, she wasn't alone. There was someone who would always, always look out for her, and make sure she was safe. And Gray was someone that she should look up to, she knew it. Even back home she had always wanted to be more like him, as chivalrous and kind and as open to new friends despite his past. He was definitely someone that she should try to emulate.

"Gray?" she began, drawing his attention again. "There's more than one way to use magic, right? I mean, even if you use the same kind. Like, um… Natsu is the Fire Dragon Slayer, but Mr. Conbolt can use a little fire magic too."

"That's right," Gray nodded over his sandwich. Apparently Roxanne was the kind who wasn't content to leave the learning for the training field.

"So is there more than one type of Ice Make?" Roxanne asked, once she'd finished the next bite of her own sandwich.

"Actually, yeah," Gray said. "There are mages who can cast Ice Make using only one hand. But we practice using two hands. I'm not sure I adequately explained before. Do you remember?"

Roxanne nodded. "Two hands creates more stable, stronger creations than magic using only one hand." Actually he hadn’t explained it at all, but Roxanne remembered Gray’s anime fight with Lyon.

"That's right. But that's where it gets complicated. The differences don't stop at one- or two-handed magic. It goes into personal preference and tendencies. For example, I use two hands and I create only inanimate objects. Meaning my creations don't move. They're not alive. But Lyon, my mentor's other apprentice, uses animated Ice Make magic. Which means that-"

"His creations can move," she whispered, filling in the blanks. She already knew that, really, but it was fascinating to hear it from him anyway, if only because she honestly hadn't expected him to be okay telling her about Lyon so soon. Natsu hadn't had any idea who Lyon was, or that he even existed. But then again, no one had asked Gray about his past until the Galuna Island Arc. So maybe Gray hadn’t told anybody because he hadn’t needed to.

"Bingo."

"And he uses two hands, too? You both were both taught by-" She had to bite her tongue to keep from saying Ur. A slip like that would tip him off that she knew more than she should. "The same mentor, right?"

"Ur… discouraged the use of one-handed magic, for the same reasons that I told you. She thought that one-handed magic was unstable, and it made the creations weaker than the same creations created with two hands. But Lyon wouldn't listen. He was convinced that one-handed magic was better and made him a better mage, better than her, because it meant he had a second hand free for other things."

Roxanne frowned. "But he's wrong."

"Yes, he is. He just doesn't see that." Gray was frowning now, staring at his sandwich like it held the answers to all of life's problems. It was plain that he didn't really enjoy talking about Lyon, even if he felt like he should.

"So… you're opposites," Roxanne said thoughtfully. "You use two hands; he uses one. Your creations don't move; his does. That's neat." She beamed up at him, trying to make him feel better. "You'd make a great team!"

Gray laughed breathily, trying to stay quiet and also trying not to offend her. "Theoretically, yes, but I doubt I'll see him again. And if I do, he'll probably be the enemy."

"Really? Why's that?"

She shouldn't have asked that. She could see the effect her question had on him. He sobered again and the lines of his face and shoulders went tight with loathing. "Because he… he blames me for Ur's death."

"Oh," she whispered, and fell silent for a time. She watched Gray, and knew from his pained expression that he was hurting. She also knew exactly what scene was playing in his head, what memory still tortured him. She left him alone with his thoughts for a little bit, but then decided it wasn't right to let him wallow. She reached out and put one small hand on top of his grown-up and callused one. She couldn't say 'it's okay', but she could tell him he wasn't alone, right?

Gray looked up at her, and some of the tension melted away. He gave her a slight, sideways smile, and Roxanne smiled back at him encouragingly, before pulling back and trying to find something else to talk about. Something to keep him from thinking more bad thoughts.

For the next half hour, Roxanne asked a variety of questions, eating while Gray answered. He gave careful, detailed replies, and admitted when he didn't know the answers. Roxanne tried to give him plenty of time to eat too, but she couldn't quite hold back her questions, and ended up rapid-firing them at him more than once, so she was done eating long before he was.

At twelve-thirty, Gray's alarm went off. He deactivated it and went back to eating. "Now I have a question for you," he said, swallowing another bite of his sandwich. "We've got two hours before I have to get you back to the guild so you can study with Master Makarov. What do you want to do between now and then?"

"Oh. Um, I don't know," Roxanne admitted. "I haven't been here very long, and I haven't seen much of the city. I'm sure you've got a better idea than I do. What do you think?"

"Well, I actually don't exactly know that much," Gray shrugged. "When I was a kid, I didn’t really go places to have fun. The most fun I had was sparring with Natsu or wrestling with Erza.”

"Oh." Roxanne looked down for a moment, frowning slightly. She'd known he'd worked really hard as a kid, but that was just… sad. "I guess that makes sense." She looked up at him again. "We spend a lot of time outside. Um. Could we spend tonight in the guild hall?"

Gray seemed surprised. "Sure. But what do you want to do?"

"I dunno," Roxanne said uncertainly, swinging her legs. "Mostly just talking with everyone, I guess?"

"If that's what you want to do, then that's what we'll do," Gray shrugged. "You've certainly earned it."

"Yay!" Roxanne grinned at him happily.

Gray smiled and went back to eating, so Rox folded her wrapper and sipped from her juice. To her dismay, the cup was emptier than she'd thought, and she pouted a bit. She looked around for a sign, only to scowl again when she remembered that she couldn't read any of them. Yet. I can't read them yet.

"Is something wrong?" Gray asked.

"Oh, um. It's not important. Are the drinks free refills?"

"That's a new term for it," Gray mused, "but I understand what you mean. Yes, you can refill your cup without paying extra for it."

"Great! Thanks, Gray!" She chirped, happiness restored and she practically skipped across the cafe to the soda fountain. She stopped and pouted dejectedly again. She couldn't read, so she had no idea which tab would give her the juice and which ones were for other drinks.

She sighed and waited near the pick-up line until an employee came close enough to notice her. Thankfully, it was the same lady who had taken her order.

"Excuse me?" Rox asked, raising her hand. The lady smiled and stopped.

"Yes?"

"Do you remember what drink I ordered?"

"Yes, I do! It's a berry and fruit juice blend." The lady smiled, which reminded Rox of Lucy’s own kind and friendly smile.

"Right. Which tab on the machine do I use to get more? I'm new to Fiore so I can't read the tabs."

"It's the third one from the right." She gestured and Rox followed her gaze, quickly locating the proper tab.

"Oh, great! Thanks so much, miss!"

"No problem." The lady smiled, laughter in her voice. Rox smiled back and made her way over to the fountain machine once more.

Gray watched everything, grinning.

"Are you ready to go?" he asked when she returned, refilled drink in hand.

She nodded, already gathering her trash onto the plastic tray.

Gray smiled again and stood up. He expertly balanced the trash and his still-full soda cup on the tray, and Roxanne followed him to the trash bin.

"Do you come here often, Gray?"

"Sort of. It's easier and cheaper for me to eat at the guild, but sometimes they can be a bit too rowdy." He winked, causing Roxanne to giggle. "So I come here when I need to get away. It's good food,