The Book of the Thousand Nights and a Night, vol 6 by Sir Richard Francis Burton (best ereader for pdf and epub .TXT) 📕

of wrath, and asked him, “Where is thy mistress?”; and he answered, “She is gone forth to the Hammam and will return forthright after she has made her ablutions.”[FN#166] When the man heard this, his suspicion concerning the semen was confirmed; and he waxed furious and said, “Go at once and bring her back.” The steward accordingly fetched her and when she came before her husband, the jealous man sprang upon her and beat her a grievous beating; then, binding her arms behind her, offered to cut her throat with a knife; but she cried out to the neighbours, who came to her, and she said to them, “This my man hath beaten me unjustly and without cause and is minded to kill me, though I know not what is mine offence.” So they rose up and asked him, “Why hast thou dealt thus by her?”

And he answered, “She is divorced.” Quoth they, “Thou hast no right to maltreat her; either divorce her or use her kindly, for we know her prudence and purity and chastity. Indeed, she hath been our neighbour this long time and we wot no evil of her.”

Quoth he, “When I came home, I found on my bed seed like human sperm, and I know not the meaning of this.” Upon this a little boy, one of those present, came forward and said, “Show it to me, nuncle mine!” When he saw it, he smelt it and, calling for fire and a frying-pan, he took the white of egg and cooked it so that it became solid. Then he ate of it and made the husband and the others taste if it, and they were certified that it was white of egg. So the husband was convinced that he had sinned against his wife’s innocence, she being clear of all offence, and the neighbours made peace between them after the divorce, and he prayed her pardon and presented her with an hundred gold pieces.

And so the wicked lover’s cunning trick came to naught. “And know, O King, that this is an instance of the malice of men and their perfidy.” When the King heard this, he bade his son be slain; but on the next day the second Wazir came forward for intercession and kissed ground in prostration. Whereupon the King said, “Raise thy head: prostration must be made to Allah only.”[FN#167] So the Minister rose from before him and said, “O

King, hasten not to slay thy son, for he was not granted to his mother by the Almighty but after despair, nor didst thou expect such good luck; and we hope that he will live to become a guerdon to thy reign and a guardian of thy good. Wherefore, have patience, O King; belike he will offer a fit excuse; and, if thou make haste to slay him, thou wilt surely repent, even as the merchant-wight repented.” Asked the King, “And how was it with the merchant, O Wazir?”; and the Wazir answered, “O King, I have heard a tale of

 

The Miser and the Loaves of Bread.

 

There was once a merchant, who was a niggard and miserly in his eating and drinking. One day, he went on a journey to a certain town and as he walked in the market-streets, behold, he met an old trot with two scones of bread which looked sound and fair, He asked her, “Are these for sale?”; and she answered, “Yes!” So he beat her down and bought them at the lowest price and took them home to his lodging, where he ate them that day. When morning morrowed, he returned to the same place and, finding the old woman there with other two scones, bought these also; and thus he ceased not during twenty-five days’ space when the old wife disappeared. He made enquiry for her, but could hear no tidings of her, till, one day as he was walking about the high streets, he chanced upon her: so he accosted her and, after the usual salutation and with much praise and politeness, asked why she had disappeared from the market and ceased to supply the two cakes of bread? Hearing this, at first she evaded giving him a reply; but he conjured her to tell him her case; so she said, “Hear my excuse, O my lord, which is that I was attending upon a man who had a corroding ulcer on his spine, and his doctor bade us knead flour with butter into a plaster and lay it on the place of pain, where it abode all night. In the morning, I used to take that flour and turn it into dough and make it into two scones, which I cooked and sold to thee or to another; but presently the man died and I was cut off from making cakes.”[FN#168] When the merchant heard this, he repented whenas repentance availed him naught, saying, “Verily, we are Allah’s and verily unto Him we are returning! There is no Majesty and there is no Might save in Him, the Glorious, the Great!” —And Shahrazad perceived the dawn of day and ceased saying her permitted say.

 

When it was the Five Hundred and Eighty-first Night, She said, It hath reached me, O auspicious King, that when the old trot told the merchant the provenance of the scones, he cried, “There is no Majesty and there is no Might save in Allah, the Glorious, the Great!” And he repeated the saying of the Most High, “Whatever evil falleth to thee it is from thyself;”[FN#169]

and vomited till he fell sick and repented whenas repentance availed him naught. “Moreover, O King” (continued the second Wazir), “I have heard tell, of the malice of women, a tale of The Lady and her Two Lovers.

 

Once upon a time there was a man, who was sword-bearer to one of the Kings, and he loved a damsel of the common sort. One day, he sent his page to her with a message, as of wont between them, and the lad sat down with her and toyed with her. She inclined to him and pressed him to her breast and groped him and kissed him whereupon he sought carnal connection of her and she consented; but, as the two were thus, lo! the youth’s master knocked at the door. So she pushed the page through a trapdoor into an underground chamber there and opened the door to his lord, who entered hending sword in hand and sat down upon her bed. Then she came up to him and sported and toyed with him, kissing him and pressing him to her bosom, and he took her and lay with her.

Presently, her husband knocked at the door and the gallant asked her, “Who is that?”; whereto she answered, “My husband.” Quoth he, “How shall I do?” Quoth she, “Draw thy sword and stand in the vestibule and abuse me and revile me; and when my husband comes in to thee, do thou go forth and wend thy ways.” He did as she bade him; and, when the husband entered, he saw the King’s sword-bearer standing with naked brand in hand, abusing and threatening his wife; but, when the lover saw him, he was ashamed and sheathing his scymitar, went forth the house. Said the man to his wife, “What means this?”; and she replied, “O man, how blessed is the hour of thy coming! Thou hast saved a True Believer from slaughter, and it happed after this fashion. I was on the house-terrace, spinning,[FN#170] when behold, there came up to me a youth, distracted and panting for fear of death, fleeing from yonder man, who followed upon him as hard as he could with his drawn sword. The young man fell down before me, and kissed my hands and feet, saying, “O Protector, of thy mercy, save me from him who would slay me wrongously!” So I hid him in that underground chamber of ours and presently in came yonder man to me, naked brand in hand, demanding the youth. But I denied him to him, whereupon he fell to abusing and threatening me as thou sawest. And praised be Allah who sent thee to me, for I was distraught and had none to deliver me!” “Well hast thou done, O

woman!” answered the husband. “Thy reward is with Allah the Almighty, and may He abundantly requite thy good deed!” Then he went to the trap door and called to the page, saying, “Come forth and fear not; no harm shall befal thee.” So he came out, trembling for fear, and the husband said, “Be of good cheer: none shall I hurt thee;” condoling with him on what had befallen him; whilst the page called down blessings on his head. Then they both went forth, nor was that Cornuto nor was the page aware of that which the woman had contrived. “This, then, O King,” said the Wazir, “is one of the tricks of women; so beware lest thou rely upon their I words.” The King was persuaded and turned from putting his son to death; but, on the third day, the favourite came in to him I and, kissing the ground before him, cried, “O

King, do me justice on thy son and be not turned from thy purpose by thy Ministers’ prate, for there is no good in wicked Wazirs, and be not as the King of Baghdad, who relied on the word of a certain wicked counsellor of his.” Quoth he, “And how was that?”

Quoth she, “There hath been told me, O auspicious and well-advised King, a tale of

 

The Kings Son and the Ogress.[FN#171]

 

A certain King had a son, whom he loved and favoured with exceeding favour, over all his other children; and this son said to him one day, “O my father, I have a mind to fare a-coursing and a-hunting.” So the King bade furnish him and commanded one of his Wazirs to bear him company and do all the service he needed during his trip. The Minister accordingly took everything that was necessary for the journey and they set out with a retinue of eunuchs and officers and pages, and rode on, sporting as they went, till they came to a green and well-grassed champaign abounding in pasture and water and game. Here the Prince turned to the Minister and told him that the place pleased him and he purposed to halt there. So they set down in that site and they loosed the falcons and lynxes and dogs and caught great plenty of game, whereat they rejoiced and abode there some days, in all joyance of life and its delight. Then the King’s son gave the signal for departure; but, as they went along, a beautiful gazelle, as if the sun rose shining from between her horns, that had strayed from her mate, sprang up before the Prince, whereupon his soul longed to make prize of her and he coveted her. So he said to the Wazir, “I have a mind to follow that gazelle;” and the Minister replied, “Do what seemeth good to thee.” Thereupon the Prince rode singlehanded after the gazelle, till he lost sight of his companions, and chased her all that day till dusk, when she took refuge in a bit of rocky ground[FN#172] and darkness closed in upon him. Then he would have turned back, but knew not the way; whereat he was sore concerned and said, “There is no Majesty and there is no Might save in Allah, the Glorious, the Great!” He sat his mare all night till morning dawned, in quest of relief, but found none; and, when the day appeared, he fared on at hazard fearful, famished, thirsty, and knowing not whither to wend till it was noon and the sun beat down upon him with burning heat. By that time he came in