Angel Dust by Aurora Morgenstern (summer beach reads .TXT) 📕

"Has nobody taught you that it isn´t nice to sneak up on people like that?", I greet him as I open the window.

"Not that I remember", his grin widens.

"What exactly are you doing outside my window?", a reasonable question considering I only met him about four hours ago and that technically he is a complete stranger. If I was still human, when did I stop think of myself as a human? I would have probably called the cops or at least gotten a secure hold on my pepper spray.

"Well has anybody shown you around angel central yet? No? I guessed as much and I have decided that I will take the burden to be your charming guide today, so what do you say?", he offers and I have to admit that i am more than tempted.

"Alright, lemme ask Michael if he´s cool with it?", why exactly I feel the need to make sure Michael is allowing me to go I don´t know, it´s not like he´s my father. But I guess in all the turmoil I have just accepted him as a new figure of authority. Nathaniel´s grin falls oh so slightly as he hears thos ewords but he quickly notices and gives me an even wider smile. 

"Sneaking out is all the more exciting, but I guess we both don´t ant trouble with mr high and mighty there. I´ll see you in five at the door?", he just disappears without waiting for an answer. With a sigh I close the window and rush downstairs with a racing heart. I shout for Michael and as I am too busy looking for him, I run straight into him as he walks out of the livingroom. 

"Hey slow down there, what´s the matter?", he takes a step back and looks at me questioningly.

"Do you mind if I go out for a while to have a look around the town?", I try to act more calm than i actually am. I don´t really know why I am this excited, but I suppose it must lie somewhere in my curious nature. 

"Are you going by yourself or is that the reason Nathaniel has been lurking infront of my door the last couple of minutes after flying by my backgarden?", Michael raises an eyebrow.

"Well yes I am going with him, does that matter?"

"While I don´t really approove of him, I don´t see any harm in it. Go ahead, but try and be back before sundown.", out of an impulse I give him a quick hug and within a few seconds I am out the door, almost knocking Nathaniel over. I really need to watch where I´m going, I think. 

"Didn´t know you´d be that eager to get out", he says joyfully and offers me his arm, still drunk on the excitement I accept the offer and together we begin to stroll toward the staircase. He is considerate enough to walk it down with me since I can´t fly by myself yet and a small part of me instantly notes that I already have too good an opinion of him. I tell the voice of reason in my head to shut it since what I may have considered strange a couple of days ago, what I thought impossible has proven to be real so a little more strange can´t possibly do any harm. We walk in silence and as my excitement dies down a little I begin to feel more and more awkward. He seems to sense this, because he starts pointing out little things in our surroundings to me and I find listening to him quite pleasant. There is a certain sense of ease around him. It takes us fifteen minutes but we finally reach the bottom of the stairs and I take a moment to catch my breath. Today I have had more excercise than I did every day of the last month I was alive combined. I will really need to work on my stamina if I ever want to look as graceful as the other angels. Now that I am less anxious and more aware of teh reality of the place I notice more detail than I did the first time walking this path. I notice the little dandelions that grow in the cracks of the cobblestone pathway, the endless mysterious alleyways that lead to unknown places I vow instantly to discover. I see small birds sitting on rooftops and windowstills, quietly watching the town go about its business. The air is heavy with the scent of heather and honeysuckle and I breathe in deeply. The sun casts a hazy glow on the scene and gives it a dreamlike, surreal quality. 

"Can you keep a secret?", Nathaniel whispers into my ear, he has to bend down to reach.

"I don´t exactly know anyone I could tell now, do I?", I retort with a conspirative wink in his direction.

"Then follow me", he commands and I figure i don´t have much of a choice but to follow him through a couple of winding alleyways and smaller paths. Admittedly I don´t know hwo he knows where he is going, I can´t tell one house from the other, but the disorientation and secrecy only add to the excitement of this little adventure. Finally we emerge from the field of houses onto a small clearing in the middle of a forest, that I hadn´t been aware existed in the first place.

"Well you can be sure I won´t tell anyone, seeing that I don´t know where we are or how to get home from here", I joke awkwardly. 

"The point is that it´s so complicated to get here that nobody ever bothers, most angels don´t know this place exists. I figured you might want a place you can go to when all this", he makes a wide gesture, "get´s too much. I tell you, it´s not easy when you´re not born into this place!"

"What do you mean? Weren´t you born here like everyone else?"

"Nope, used to be human just like you. It´s why I´m not as stuck up as everyone else in this place", he grins and scratches the back of his neck. 

"Well I can´t judge, so far I have barely met anyone. But Michael says I´m going to be training with Gabriel tomorrow...", I take a look around the clearing to get a better feel of my surroundings. The forest around us is pretty dense, only one side of the clearing is not covered in trees but rather the backwall of houses that encase the small walkway that led us here. The sunlight from above is interrupted by the thick canopy above and only small specks of pure sunlight reach the ground, everything else shines in an eerie, yet comforting green gloom. Most of the trees are thick, sturdy oaks that look like they have been here for millenia and will remain here forever, their thick bark covered with moss. I can see ivy climbing up some of them, clinging on to the bark like a dying man to his last breath. The grass is lush and vibrant with little, random intervals of blue forgetmenots and fiery red poppies. The clearing has a deep quality of escapism embedded in it in its deserted state.  I marvel at the wonderous scene around me, not really expecting Nathaniel to say anything and yet I am glad when he does break the silence.

"Gabriel´s alright. He´s my mentor. He´s definetly more easy-going about things than Michael, but he can be a bit annoying. He always insists I talk about my feelings and he keeps banging on about how my human nature is such an advantage to me, most angels have a different outlook on that one...", Nathaniel sighs but it seems like he is trying to hard to be annoyed, like he is hiding something. I consider asking him about it for a moment but decide to let it go instead. I don´t really want to ruin whatever it is that we are developing here. 

"Do the other angels not like you know human angels?"

"Most of them want to put us in the same sort of box as the nephilim, since technically we weren´t born with the angelic grace. They feel superior, well not all fo them do but most. I got a couple of good friends that are pretty okay, I´ll introduce you some time if you want?". Nephilim, the word strikes a chord but I can´t remember where I heard it before. 

"What´s a Nephilim?", I ask curiously. For me there is nothing more satisfying than aquiring new knowledge, unlike most children I was always eager to go to school to learn about the way the world works. From a young age I devoured books way out of my age class with a passion that worried my teachers continuously. All this seems so far behind me now, like a different life all together and in a way it is. I wonder if being an angel will change me, will I forget all the people I used to know, places I used to go and all the memories I made as a human? The thought worries me beyong measure, change while necessary is also frightening.

"The nephilim are half breeds, children of angels and humans. In the eyes of most angels they are to be blamed for their parents sins. There is barely any of them left, there was a time when the angels still killed Nephilim, now it is humans that kill them. Nephilim are stronger than normal humans, some of their parents grace still runs in their veins. Humans and angels alike are often scared by things that are different from what they know", there is a sadness in his voice that resonates with something deep within me. I look up and at him for the first time since he lead me here. I notice that his eyes aren´t black as I originally thought but rather a really dark brown that is only visible when the sun hits his eyes at a certain angle. His wings seem to be almost melting into the dark of the forest. Everything about him in this place shows that he belongs in dark places rather than the light, the light gives him sharp edges while here he seems more at ease, at peace with himself almost. He notices that i am looking at him and smiles softly. 

"You seem to be coping with all this pretty well...", he trails off at the end, almost as if to leave it open as a question. The sentence hangs in the air heavily. Am I coping well with this? Or have I rather just been ignoring the massive change my life has undergone, surpressed the shock and anxiety and rather focused on the pretty side of it? My mind is clogged, thoughts racing, but I don´t know him well enough just yet to place my cofidence in him.

"I suppose. I imagine that just like every other human I have always dreamt of being more than just that. Above all i have always wanted to fly. All this is mesmerizing and exciting and beautiful beyond measure. So I guess that helps, also I won´t have to worry about morgages and taxes now"

"Has nobody told you angels have to pay heavenly tax and morgages too?", his voice turns serious and my facial expression turns into disbelieveing surprise. He starts laughing as he sees my sour expression and I know that he is making fun of me.

"Come on...heavenly taxes...you should see your face right now", he can barely get the words out inbetween laughs and when I glare at him