He Knew He Was Right by Anthony Trollope (books you need to read .txt) ๐
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communication between them till her father and mother should be in
England; but in telling him so, had so frankly confessed her own
affection for him and had so sturdily promised to be true to him, that
no lover could have been reasonably aggrieved by such an interdiction.
Nora was quite conscious of this, and was aware that Hugh Stanbury had
received such encouragement as ought, at any rate to, bring him to the
new Rowley establishment, as soon as he should learn where it had fixed
itself. But when at the end of ten days he had not shown himself, she
began to feel doubts. Could it be that he had changed his mind, that he
was unwilling to encounter refusal from her father, or that he had
found, on looking into his own affairs more closely, that it would be
absurd for him to propose to take a wife to himself while his means
were so poor and so precarious? Sir Marmaduke during this time had been
so unhappy, so fretful, so indignant, and so much worried, that Nora
herself had become almost afraid of him; and, without much reasoning on
the matter, had taught herself to believe that Hugh might be actuated
by similar fears. She had intended to tell her mother of what had
occurred between her and Stanbury the first moment that she and Lady
Rowley were together; but then there had fallen upon them that terrible
incident of the loss of the child, and the whole family had become at
once so wrapped up in the agony of the bereaved mother, and so full of
rage against the unreasonable father, that there seemed to Nora to be
no possible opportunity for the telling of her own love-story. Emily
herself appeared to have forgotten it in the midst of her own misery,
and had not mentioned Hugh Stanburyโs name since they had been in
Manchester Street. We have all felt how on occasions our own hopes and
fears, nay, almost our own individuality, become absorbed in and
obliterated by the more pressing cares and louder voices of those
around us. Nora hardly dared to allude to herself while her sisterโs
grief was still so prominent, and while her father was daily
complaining of his own personal annoyances at the Colonial Office. It
seemed to her that at such a moment she could not introduce a new
matter for dispute, and perhaps a new subject of dismay.
Nevertheless, as the days passed by, and as she saw nothing of Hugh
Stanbury, her heart became sore and her spirit vexed. It seemed to her
that if she were now deserted by him, all the world would be over for
her. The Glascock episode in her life had passed by, that episode which
might have been her history, which might have been a history so
prosperous, so magnificent, and probably so happy. As she thought of
herself and of circumstances as they had happened to her, of the
resolutions which she had made as to her own career when she first came
to London, and of the way in which she had thrown all those resolutions
away in spite of the wonderful success which had come in her path, she
could not refrain from thinking that she had brought herself to
shipwreck by her own indecision. It must not be imagined that she
regretted what she had done. She knew very well that to have acted
otherwise than she did when Mr Glascock came to her at Nuncombe Putney
would have proved her to be heartless, selfish, and unwomanly. Long
before that time she had determined that it was her duty to marry a
rich man and, if possible, a man in high position. Such a one had come
to her, one endowed with all the good things of the world beyond her
most sanguine expectation, and she had rejected him! She knew that she
had been right because she had allowed herself to love the other man.
She did not repent what she had done, the circumstances being as they
were, but she almost regretted that she had been so soft in heart, so
susceptible of the weakness of love, so little able to do as she
pleased with herself. Of what use to her was it that she loved this man
with all her strength of affection when he never came to her, although
the time at which he had been told that he might come was now ten days
past?
She was sitting one afternoon in the drawing-room listlessly reading,
or pretending to read, a novel, when, on a sudden, Hugh Stanbury was
announced. The circumstances of the moment were most unfortunate for
such a visit. Sir Marmaduke, who had been down at Whitehall in the
morning, and from thence had made a journey to St. Diddulphโs-in-the-East
and back, was exceedingly cross and out of temper. They had told him at
his office that they feared he would not suffice to carry through the
purpose for which he had been brought home. And his brother-in-law, the
parson, had expressed to him an opinion that he was in great part
responsible for the misfortune of his daughter, by the encouragement
which he had given to such a man as Colonel Osborne. Sir Marmaduke had
in consequence quarrelled both with the chief clerk and with Mr
Outhouse, and had come home surly and discontented. Lady Rowley and her
eldest daughter were away, closeted at the moment with Lady Milborough,
with whom they were endeavouring to arrange some plan by which the boy
might at any rate be given back. Poor Emily Trevelyan was humble enough
now to Lady Milborough, was prepared to be humble to any one, and in any
circumstances, so that she should not be required to acknowledge that
she had entertained Colonel Osborne as her lover. The two younger
girls, Sophy and Lucy, were in the room when Stanbury was announced, as
was also Sir Marmaduke, who at that very moment was uttering angry
growls at the obstinacy and want of reason with which he had been
treated by Mr Outhouse. Now Sir Marmaduke had not so much as heard the
name of Hugh Stanbury as yet; and Nora, though her listlessness was all
at an end, at once felt how impossible it would be to explain any of
the circumstances of her case in such an interview as this. While,
however, Hughโs dear steps were heard upon the stairs, her feminine
mind at once went to work to ascertain in what best mode, with what
most attractive reason for his presence, she might introduce the young
man to her father. Had not the girls been then present, she thought
that it might have been expedient to leave Hugh to tell his own story
to Sir Marmaduke. But she had no opportunity of sending her sisters
away; and, unless chance should remove them, this could not be done.
โHe is son of the lady we were with at Nuncombe Putney,โ she whispered
to her father as she got up to move across the room to welcome her
lover. Now Sir Marmaduke had expressed great disapproval of that
retreat to Dartmoor, and had only understood respecting it that it had
been arranged between Trevelyan and the family in whose custody his two
daughters had been sent away into banishment. He was not therefore
specially disposed to welcome Hugh Stanbury in consequence of this mode
of introduction.
Hugh, who had asked for Lady Rowley and Mrs Trevelyan and had learned
that they were out before he had mentioned Miss Rowleyโs name, was
almost prepared to take his sweetheart into his arms. In that
half-minute he had taught himself to expect that he would meet her
alone, and had altogether forgotten Sir Marmaduke. Young men when they
call at four oโclock in the day never expect to find papas at home. And
of Sophia and Lucy he had either heard nothing or had forgotten what he
had heard. He repressed himself however in time, and did not commit
either Nora or himself by any very vehement demonstration of affection.
But he did hold her hand longer than he should have done, and Sir
Marmaduke saw that he did so.
โThis is papa,โ said Nora. โPapa, this is our friend, Mr Hugh
Stanbury.โ The introduction was made in a manner almost absurdly
formal, but poor Noraโs difficulties lay heavy upon her. Sir Marmaduke
muttered something but it was little more than a grunt. โMamma and
Emily are out,โ continued Nora. โI dare say they will be in soon.โ Sir
Marmaduke looked round sharply at the man. Why was he to be encouraged
to stay till Lady Rowley should return? Lady Rowley did not want to see
him. It seemed to Sir Marmaduke, in the midst of his troubles, that
this was no time to be making new acquaintances. โThese are my sisters,
Mr Stanbury,โ continued Nora. โThis is Sophia, and this is Lucy.โ
Sophia and Lucy would have been thoroughly willing to receive their
sisterโs lover with genial kindness if they had been properly
instructed, and if the time had been opportune; but, as it was, they
had nothing to say. They, also, could only mutter some little sound
intended to be more courteous than their fatherโs grunt. Poor Nora!
โI hope you are comfortable here,โ said Hugh.
โThe house is all very well,โ said Nora, โbut we donโt like the
neighbourhood.โ
Hugh also felt that conversation was difficult. He had soon come to
perceive before he had been in the room half a minute that the
atmosphere was not favourable to his mission. There was to be no
embracing or permission for embracing on the present occasion. Had he
been left alone with Sir Marmaduke he would probably have told his
business plainly, let Sir Marmadukeโs manner to him have been what it
might; but it was impossible for him to do this with three young ladies
in the room with him. Seeing that Nora was embarrassed by her
difficulties, and that Noraโs father was cross and silent, he
endeavoured to talk to the other girls, and asked them concerning their
journey and the ship in which they had come. But it was very up-hill
work. Lucy and Sophy could talk as glibly as any young ladies home from
any colony, and no higher degree of fluency can be expressed, but now
they were cowed. Their elder sister was shamefully and most
undeservedly disgraced, and this man had had somethingโthey knew not
whatโto do with it. โIs Priscilla quite well?โ Nora asked at last.
โQuite well. I heard from her yesterday. You know they have left the
Clock House.โ
โI had not heard it.โ
โOh yes and they are living in a small cottage just outside the
village. And what else do you think has happened?โ
โNothing bad, I hope, Mr Stanbury.โ
โMy sister Dorothy has left her aunt, and is living with them again at
Nuncombe.โ
โHas there been a quarrel, Mr Stanbury?โ
โWell, yes after a fashion there has, I suppose. But it is a long story
and would not interest Sir Marmaduke. The wonder is that Dorothy should
have been able to stay so long with my aunt. I will tell it you all
some day.โ Sir Marmaduke could not understand why a long story about
this manโs aunt and sister should be told to his daughter. He forgot, as
men always do in such circumstances forget that, while he was living in
the Mandarins, his daughter, living in England, would of course pick up
new interest and become intimate with new histories. But he did not
forget that pressure of the hand which he had seen, and he determined
that his daughter Nora could not have any worse
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