A Solutions Manual to Life by Elizabeth J. D. (howl and other poems txt) 📕

we cannot be too much larger than an atom in God's eyes. How big must God be in comparison to us? Do I think He can't handle this? Do I think He can't drive out my fears? Do I believe my abilities matter in the least to Him? Moses was no orator, but the Lord gave him words, speaking through His treasured friend and servant.

Love God.


Follow Him.
Trust Him.
Give first to Him - even those things and people most precious.
Above all, love Him.
And there is reason to be fearless.

Perfect love drives out fear.


Swallowing a Time Bomb

Internalized.
When you cannot cry any more.
Or
When tears simply will not come.
When they refuse.
When you don't know how to shake it.
When you fail to look to God first....
Internalized or not, pain manifests itself.
It is not physical.
It leaves no visual harm.
But who's to say that the invisible isn't more real than the visible?

Breathing. In. And out. In....stop...out. In....pause...out. Giving in. In-out-in-out-in-out. Faster. Gasping. Lips parted, mouth wide open in a silent, beseeching scream, eyes screwed shut in pain. Lurching over, clutching her side. Gasping for air...getting too much of it. Exhaling in bursts. Nausea kicks in. It hurts! It HURTS! Take it away! Make it stop! Smothering. Overwhelming her, but quietly...Like a ghost embracing her until she could no longer breathe. Tearing into her chest with invisible talons, reaching into the depths and harming them, leaving only silvery scars on the surface that shouldn't have had time to heal so quickly. Some times were worse than others. She wasn't sure which was worse; when it left a scratch, trailing red on her heart's flesh, or when it hurt without the visual proof; without so much of the sting but with just as much depth. Oh, but it hurt. One way or the other...one form of doubled-over, retching pain or the next...it hurt. 'It hurts...it hurts...' she whimpers. 'Oh, it HURTS!!!!!' She says it in a pleading tone. Please...please...make it stop. Make it stop. Make it stop. Repeating. Hoping. Not expecting it to stop...wishing it would. Shaking her head, gritting her teeth, like one trying to get rid of voices. She shakes, tremors going throughout her entire body. 'How....' she gasps, sucking in air and exhaling irregularly...'how can something invisible hurt so much?!'

Imprint

Publication Date: 04-01-2011

All Rights Reserved