HER CHOICE by PVV Satyanarayana (best book club books .txt) 📕
Excerpt from the book:
When the educated youth faced unemployment shattering their hopes, what is required is the self-confidence that could take them forward. When faced with the choice of choosing between a man who leans on her, and the one who stands on his own - whom does a girl choose for a life partner?
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- Author: PVV Satyanarayana
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fear of rejection”.
Still there was no response from her. She seemed to have been lost in thoughts.
“Pooja, are you listening?” He asked again trying to jerk her out of her thoughts. “I love you and wish to marry you. I would make you happy, I promise”.
Pooja could hear him clearly despite the clamour of the sea. Shifting her eyes from the setting sun, she looked at him. To her, Manish looked like a new man. “Really!?” she smiled.
The darkness crept on to the horizon even as the sun had disappeared into the vast sea. The roar of the sea had increased with the nightfall. With the full moon showing up, the environs lit up driving away the darkness. As the moonlight danced on the sea-waters, the waves appeared to vie with one another to reach the sky and to kiss the moon. The sands were shining like silver in the moonlight.
Manish’s eyes stay fixed on Pooja’s face as he tried to study it. Her stoic silence made him uneasy and restless.
At last Pooja said with a smile, “Do you think that one-sided love can culminate into a marriage?”
He was awash. “Don’t you love me, Pooja?”
“Did I ever behave with you so as to give you such an impression?” she shot back.
“But…” he stammered. “Ok, I am proposing from my side now. Will you please marry me?”
“Sorry, Manish!” She said quietly, shifting her looks away.
“But, why?” he was perplexed.
“Do you need a reason for everything? Don’t you think that a woman too would have her own likes and dislikes?” she asked in wonderment.
“What is wrong with me? I have a good job and a status. I don’t think I am unhandsome to look at. Also I am not a stranger. Rather we have been long-standing, intimate pals. Above all, I love you very much. What else does a woman expect in her hubby, after all?” Feeling hurt and irked, he quizzed her, trying to suppress his disappointment and annoyance.
Pooja cachinnated at his words and said chidingly, “My dear ninny, why do you get so much upset? Why don’t you realize that I too could have loved someone else?” She put her hand on his, trying to soothe him, to mollify his feelings.
“You…you love someone else!?” He exclaimed in disbelief.
“Why not? Just because I happen to be a girl, don’t I have the privilege of choosing my own life-partner?” she asked burlesque.
He felt stumped. “I…I don’t mean that. I mean, who that lucky guy is…!?” he stuttered.
Shyness engulfing suddenly, she looked at the sands and said, “It’s Gokul…if you really care to know”.
Manish was stunned. Gokul, of all the people! … A low-paid drillmaster who could hardly make both ends meet. The son of a railway coolie. A man with enormous personal responsibilities, how would he be able to satisfy even her minimum needs? Even by the looks he was such an unimpressive figure. What, then, had attracted Pooja to him!? … Manish could not stomach it. He did not seek to hide his feelings and the disappointment over her ‘unwary’ choice. He could not help asking her in what way Gokul was superior to him to deserve her love.
Peeved at his observations about Gokul, Pooja eyed him wistfully. His face looked sallow and solemn. “Manish!” She said staring into his eyes. “True, the marriage would provide the woman with social and financial security. That is the reason why the parents always try to give their daughters into a well-to-do family. But, that does not mean that the woman always hankers after the riches. What attracts more in the man is his manliness rather than his riches. Don’t mistake the word ‘manliness’ for his sexual ability. I am not talking of his virility, mind you. I mean the admirable qualities like the courage, confidence, daringness, etc. in him …”
Pooja stopped as the pea-vendor approached them. As Manish brushed him off curtly, she continued, “Did you say that I would be better off if I became your better-half? Owing to your prestigious position and status? But, then, when do you realize that there is something called contentment? That there is nothing greater than one’s contentment??” She slapped her hand to drive away the insect that had just landed on her.
“You have asked me as to what is there in Gokul that is not in you, for me to love him. Since you want to know, let me be frank with you … What is lacking in you but abundant in Gokul is the self-confidence! … You do not have faith in yourself. You are timorous and diffident. You tend to view the problems through a magnifier and get easily distraught. Gokul, on the other hand, may not be having affluence but is affluent in self-confidence and courage. As you know, he has never allowed the adversities to take better of him. He faces the vagaries of life with a smile”. She halted for a while trying to study the impact of her words on him.
“Manish, do you remember what you did two years ago? You had tried to kill yourself, betraying your cowardice, for failing to secure a job…a job befitting your qualifications! Instead of facing the life bravely, you had chosen the path of escapism. And you did not hesitate to ditch your mother and sister, who had pinned all their hopes on you. Don’t you agree that it is nothing but sheer lack of self-confidence and fear of life?”
Manish hung his head as he could not deny what she had said.
“And my friend! As you know, the life has brought nothing but bitterness for Gokul. Yet, her possesses great faith in life and the system, and exuberates confidence in self. He nurtures hope in the future. That’s why he is able to smile all the while”.
“I know my drawback, Pooja. That’s why I need a woman like you for support,” insisted Manish.
“That exactly is your weakness!” She had chided him. “Be a man! Rather than falling back on the woman, you should be supporting her. You should learn to stand on your own. And not on somebody’s support”.
“This precisely is the reason why I love Gokul. He aspires to stand on his own. Through thick and thin. He may not be having riches, but he has a rich heart and a great attitude towards life. These are the qualities that have stolen my heart,” she flashed a charming smile.
Suddenly there heard big claps piercing through the wind and the din of the sea. Startled, both Pooja and Manish turned around. Gokul was standing behind them smiling and clapping. Fully engrossed in the conversation, none of the duo could notice his arrival.
“Well, Pooja! Tell this to your dear brother and he is sure to throw me into the sea…without even a second’s hesitation!” Gokul said laughing.
“No, Gokul. My brother knows all about you, and he likes you,” Pooja corrected him smiling. “He is a typical middle class man. In these days of exorbitant dowries and uncertainties of marriage, he would be too glad to offer you his sister in a platter”.
“Oh, my! I’m trapped!” Gokul sat opposite them. Pooja blushed at his bewitching looks.
Manish got up abruptly. “I’m sorry, Pooja. I have bothered you. I should have known your mind…I wish you both all the best!”
Pooja felt sorry for him. She too got up and took his hand into hers. “Are you upset, Manish?”
“No, no, Pooja. I am wishing you whole-heartedly,” said Manish albeit out of heart.
“Manish! Promise me that our friendship will remain for ever “said Gokul extending his hand. Manish took it and pressed it with warmth, “Sure, Gokul!”
With Pooja at the center, the trio walked on the beach hand in hand, even as the moon watched them cheerfully.
Still there was no response from her. She seemed to have been lost in thoughts.
“Pooja, are you listening?” He asked again trying to jerk her out of her thoughts. “I love you and wish to marry you. I would make you happy, I promise”.
Pooja could hear him clearly despite the clamour of the sea. Shifting her eyes from the setting sun, she looked at him. To her, Manish looked like a new man. “Really!?” she smiled.
The darkness crept on to the horizon even as the sun had disappeared into the vast sea. The roar of the sea had increased with the nightfall. With the full moon showing up, the environs lit up driving away the darkness. As the moonlight danced on the sea-waters, the waves appeared to vie with one another to reach the sky and to kiss the moon. The sands were shining like silver in the moonlight.
Manish’s eyes stay fixed on Pooja’s face as he tried to study it. Her stoic silence made him uneasy and restless.
At last Pooja said with a smile, “Do you think that one-sided love can culminate into a marriage?”
He was awash. “Don’t you love me, Pooja?”
“Did I ever behave with you so as to give you such an impression?” she shot back.
“But…” he stammered. “Ok, I am proposing from my side now. Will you please marry me?”
“Sorry, Manish!” She said quietly, shifting her looks away.
“But, why?” he was perplexed.
“Do you need a reason for everything? Don’t you think that a woman too would have her own likes and dislikes?” she asked in wonderment.
“What is wrong with me? I have a good job and a status. I don’t think I am unhandsome to look at. Also I am not a stranger. Rather we have been long-standing, intimate pals. Above all, I love you very much. What else does a woman expect in her hubby, after all?” Feeling hurt and irked, he quizzed her, trying to suppress his disappointment and annoyance.
Pooja cachinnated at his words and said chidingly, “My dear ninny, why do you get so much upset? Why don’t you realize that I too could have loved someone else?” She put her hand on his, trying to soothe him, to mollify his feelings.
“You…you love someone else!?” He exclaimed in disbelief.
“Why not? Just because I happen to be a girl, don’t I have the privilege of choosing my own life-partner?” she asked burlesque.
He felt stumped. “I…I don’t mean that. I mean, who that lucky guy is…!?” he stuttered.
Shyness engulfing suddenly, she looked at the sands and said, “It’s Gokul…if you really care to know”.
Manish was stunned. Gokul, of all the people! … A low-paid drillmaster who could hardly make both ends meet. The son of a railway coolie. A man with enormous personal responsibilities, how would he be able to satisfy even her minimum needs? Even by the looks he was such an unimpressive figure. What, then, had attracted Pooja to him!? … Manish could not stomach it. He did not seek to hide his feelings and the disappointment over her ‘unwary’ choice. He could not help asking her in what way Gokul was superior to him to deserve her love.
Peeved at his observations about Gokul, Pooja eyed him wistfully. His face looked sallow and solemn. “Manish!” She said staring into his eyes. “True, the marriage would provide the woman with social and financial security. That is the reason why the parents always try to give their daughters into a well-to-do family. But, that does not mean that the woman always hankers after the riches. What attracts more in the man is his manliness rather than his riches. Don’t mistake the word ‘manliness’ for his sexual ability. I am not talking of his virility, mind you. I mean the admirable qualities like the courage, confidence, daringness, etc. in him …”
Pooja stopped as the pea-vendor approached them. As Manish brushed him off curtly, she continued, “Did you say that I would be better off if I became your better-half? Owing to your prestigious position and status? But, then, when do you realize that there is something called contentment? That there is nothing greater than one’s contentment??” She slapped her hand to drive away the insect that had just landed on her.
“You have asked me as to what is there in Gokul that is not in you, for me to love him. Since you want to know, let me be frank with you … What is lacking in you but abundant in Gokul is the self-confidence! … You do not have faith in yourself. You are timorous and diffident. You tend to view the problems through a magnifier and get easily distraught. Gokul, on the other hand, may not be having affluence but is affluent in self-confidence and courage. As you know, he has never allowed the adversities to take better of him. He faces the vagaries of life with a smile”. She halted for a while trying to study the impact of her words on him.
“Manish, do you remember what you did two years ago? You had tried to kill yourself, betraying your cowardice, for failing to secure a job…a job befitting your qualifications! Instead of facing the life bravely, you had chosen the path of escapism. And you did not hesitate to ditch your mother and sister, who had pinned all their hopes on you. Don’t you agree that it is nothing but sheer lack of self-confidence and fear of life?”
Manish hung his head as he could not deny what she had said.
“And my friend! As you know, the life has brought nothing but bitterness for Gokul. Yet, her possesses great faith in life and the system, and exuberates confidence in self. He nurtures hope in the future. That’s why he is able to smile all the while”.
“I know my drawback, Pooja. That’s why I need a woman like you for support,” insisted Manish.
“That exactly is your weakness!” She had chided him. “Be a man! Rather than falling back on the woman, you should be supporting her. You should learn to stand on your own. And not on somebody’s support”.
“This precisely is the reason why I love Gokul. He aspires to stand on his own. Through thick and thin. He may not be having riches, but he has a rich heart and a great attitude towards life. These are the qualities that have stolen my heart,” she flashed a charming smile.
Suddenly there heard big claps piercing through the wind and the din of the sea. Startled, both Pooja and Manish turned around. Gokul was standing behind them smiling and clapping. Fully engrossed in the conversation, none of the duo could notice his arrival.
“Well, Pooja! Tell this to your dear brother and he is sure to throw me into the sea…without even a second’s hesitation!” Gokul said laughing.
“No, Gokul. My brother knows all about you, and he likes you,” Pooja corrected him smiling. “He is a typical middle class man. In these days of exorbitant dowries and uncertainties of marriage, he would be too glad to offer you his sister in a platter”.
“Oh, my! I’m trapped!” Gokul sat opposite them. Pooja blushed at his bewitching looks.
Manish got up abruptly. “I’m sorry, Pooja. I have bothered you. I should have known your mind…I wish you both all the best!”
Pooja felt sorry for him. She too got up and took his hand into hers. “Are you upset, Manish?”
“No, no, Pooja. I am wishing you whole-heartedly,” said Manish albeit out of heart.
“Manish! Promise me that our friendship will remain for ever “said Gokul extending his hand. Manish took it and pressed it with warmth, “Sure, Gokul!”
With Pooja at the center, the trio walked on the beach hand in hand, even as the moon watched them cheerfully.
***
Publication Date: 08-07-2010
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