The Head of the House of Coombe by Frances Hodgson Burnett (cool books to read .txt) đ
"What will you DO with her?" he inquired detachedly.
The frequently referred to "babe unborn" could not have presented a gaze of purer innocence than did the lovely Feather. Her eyes of larkspur blueness were clear of any thought or intention as spring water is clear at its unclouded best.
Her ripple of a laugh was clear also--enchantingly clear.
"Do!" repeated. "What is it people 'do' with babies? I suppose the nurse knows. I don't. I wouldn't touch her for the world. She frightens me."
She floated a trifle nearer and bent to look at her.
"I shall call her Robin," she said. "Her name is really Roberta as she couldn't be called Robert. People will turn round to look at a girl when they hear her called Robin. Besides she has eyes like a robin. I wish she'd open them and let you see."
By chance she did open them at the moment--quite slowly. They were dark liquid brown and seemed to be all lustrous iris which
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âWhat is that child waiting for? I should really like to know,â the distant nurse said again curiously.
If she had been eighteen years old she would have said to herself that she was waiting hours and hours. She would have looked at a little watch a thousand times; she would have walked up and down and round and round the garden never losing sight of the gateâor any other point for that matterâfor more than a minute. Each sound of the church clock striking a few streets away would have brought her young heart thumping into her throat.
But a child has no watch, no words out of which to build hopes and fears and reasons, arguments battling against anguish which growsâpalliations, excuses. Robin, could only wait in the midst of a slow dark, rising tide of something she had no name for. This slow rising of an engulfing flood she felt when pins and needles began to take possession of her feet, when her legs ached, and her eyes felt as if they had grown big and tightly strained. Donal! Donal! Donal!
Who knows but that some echo of the terror against which she had fought and screamed on the night when she had lain alone in the dark in her cradle and Feather had hid her head under the pillowâcame back and closed slowly around and over her, filling her inarticulate being with panic which at last reached its unbearable height? She had not really stood waiting the entire morning, but she was young enough to think that she had and that at any moment Anne might come and take her away. He had not come runningâhe had not come laughingâhe had not come with his plaid swinging and his feather standing high! There came a moment when her strained eyes no longer seemed to see clearly! Something like a big lump crawled up into her throat! Something of the same sort happened the day she had burst into a wail of loneliness and Andrews had pinched her. Panic seized her; she clutched the breast of her rose-coloured frock and panic-driven turned and fled into a thick clump of bushes where there was no path and where even Donal had never pierced.
âThat child has run away at last,â the distant nurse remarked, âIâd like to find out what she WAS waiting for.â
The shrubs were part of the enclosing planting of the Gardens. The children who came to play on the grass and paths felt as if they formed a sort of forest. Because of this, Robin had made her frantic dash to their shelter. No one would comeâno one would see herâno one would hear her, beneath them it was almost dark. Bereft, broken and betrayed, a little mad thing, she pushed her way into their shadow and threw herself face downward, a small, writhing, rose-coloured heap, upon the damp mould. She could not have explained what she was doing or why she had given up all, as if some tidal wave had overwhelmed her. Suddenly she knew that all her new world had goneâforever and ever. As it had come so it had gone. As she had not doubted the permanence of its joy, so she KNEW that the end had come. Only the wisdom of the occult would dare to suggest that from her child mate, squaring his sturdy young shoulders against the world as the flying train sped on its way, some wave of desperate, inchoate thinking rushed backward. There was nothing more. He would not come back running. He was GONE!
There was no Andrews to hear. Hidden in the shadow under the shrubs, the rattle and roar of the street outside the railing drowned her mad little cries. All she had never done before, she did then. Her hands beat on the damp mould and tore at itâher small feet beat it and dug into it. She cried, she sobbed; the big lump in her throat almost strangled herâshe writhed and did not know she was writhing. Her tears pouring forth wet her hair, her face, her dress. She did not cry out, âDonal! Donal!â because he was nowhereânowhere. If Andrews had seen her she would have said she was âin a tantrum,â But she was not. The world had been torn away.
A long time afterwards, as it seemed to her, she crawled out from under the shrubs, carrying her pretty flopping hat in her earth-stained hand. It was not pretty any more. She had been lying on it and it was crushed and flat. She crept slowly round the curve to Anne.
Seeing her, Anne sprang to her feet. The rose was a piteous thing beaten to earth by a storm. The childâs face was swollen and stained, her hair was tangled and damp there were dark marks of mould on her dress, her hat, her hands, her white cheeks; her white shoes were earth-stained also, and the feet in the rose-coloured socks dragged themselves heavilyâslowly.
âMy gracious!â the young woman almost shrieked. âWhatâs happened! Where have you been? Did you fall down? Ah, my good gracious! Mercy me!â
Robin caught her breath but did not say a word.
âYou fell down on a flower bed where theyâd been watering the plants!â almost wept Anne. âYou must have. There isnât that much dirt anywhere else in the Gardens.â
And when she took her charge home that was the story she told Andrews. Out of Robin she could get nothing, and it was necessary to have an explanation.
The truth, of which she knew nothing, was but the story of a childâs awful dismay and a childâs woe at one of Lifeâs first betrayals. It would be left behind by the days which came and wentâit would passâas all things pass but the everlasting hillsâbut in this way it was that it came and wrote itself upon the tablets of a childâs day.
âThe childâs always been well, maâam,â Andrews was standing, the image of exact correctness, in her mistressâ bedroom, while Feather lay in bed with her breakfast on a convenient and decorative little table. âItâs been a thing Iâve prided myself on. But I should say she isnât well now.â
âWell, I suppose itâs only natural that she should begin sometime,â remarked Feather. âThey always do, of course. I remember we all had things when we were children. What does the doctor say? I hope it isnât the measles, or the beginning of anything worse?â
âNo, maâam, it isnât. Itâs nothing like a childâs disease. I could have managed that. Thereâs good private nursing homes for them in these days. Everything taken care of exactly as it should be and no trouble of disinfecting and isolating for the family. I know what youâd have wished to have done, maâam.â
âYou do know your business, Andrews,â was Featherâs amiable comment.
âThank you, maâam,â from Andrews. âInfectious things are easy managed if theyâre taken away quick. But the doctor said you must be spoken to because perhaps a change was needed.â
âYou could take her to Ramsgate or somewhere bracing.â said Feather. âBut what did he SAY?â
âHe seemed puzzled, maâam. Thatâs what struck me. When I told him about her not eatingâand lying awake crying all nightâto judge from her looks in the morningâand getting thin and paleâhe examined her very careful and he looked queer and he said, âThis child hasnât had a SHOCK of any kind, has she? This looks like what we should call shockâif she were olderâ.â
Feather laughed.
âHow could a baby like that have a shock?â
âThatâs what I thought myself, maâam,â answered Andrews. âA child thatâs had her hours regular and is fed and bathed and sleeps by the clock, and goes out and plays by herself in the Gardens, well watched over, hasnât any chance to get shocks. I told him so and he sat still and watched her quite curious, and then he said very slow: âSometimes little children are a good deal shaken up by a fall when they are playing. Do you remember any chance fall when she cried a good deal?ââ
âBut you didnât, of course,â said Feather.
âNo, maâam, I didnât. I keep my eye on her pretty strict and shouldnât encourage wild running or playing. I donât let her play with other children. And sheâs not one of those stumbling, falling children. I told him the only fall I ever knew of her having was a bit of a slip on a soft flower bed that had just been wateredâto judge from the state her clothes were in. She had cried because sheâs not used to such things, and I think she was frightened. But there wasnât a scratch or a shadow of a bruise on her. Even that wouldnât have happened if Iâd been with her. It was when I was ill and my sister Anne took my place. Ann thought at first that sheâd been playing with a little boy she had made friends withâbut she found out that the boy hadnât come that morningââ
âA boy!â Andrews was sharp enough to detect a new and interested note. âWhat boy?â
âShe wouldnât have played with any other child if Iâd been thereâ said Andrews, âI was pretty sharp with Anne about it. But she said he was an aristocratic looking little fellowââ
âWas he in Highland costume?â Feather interrupted.
âYes, maâam. Anne excused herself by saying she thought you must know something about him. She declares she saw you come into the Gardens and speak to his Mother quite friendly. That was the day before Robin fell and ruined her rose-coloured smock and things. But it wasnât through playing boisterous with the boyâbecause he didnât come that morning, as I said, and he never has since.â
Andrews, on this, found cause for being momentarily puzzled by the change of expression in her mistressâ face. Was it an odd little gleam of angry spite she saw?
âAnd never has since, has he?â Mrs. Gareth-Lawless said with a half laugh.
âNot once, maâam,â answered Andrews. âAnd Anne thinks it queer the child never seemed to look for him. As if sheâd lost interest. She just droops and drags about and doesnât try to play at all.â
âHow much did she play with him?â
âWell, he was such a fine little fellow and had such a respectable, elderly, Scotch looking woman in charge of him that Anne owned up that she hadnât thought there was any objections to them playing together. She says they were as well behaved and quiet as children could be.â Andrews thought proper to further justify herself by repeating, âShe didnât think there could be any objection.â
âThere couldnât,â Mrs. Gareth-Lawless remarked. âI do know the boy. He is a relation of Lord Coombeâs.â
âIndeed, maâam,â with colourless civility, âAnne said he was a big handsome child.â
Feather took a small bunch of hothouse grapes from her breakfast tray and, after picking one off, suddenly began to laugh.
âGood gracious, Andrews!â she said. âHe was the âshockâ! How perfectly ridiculous! Robin had never played with a boy before and she fell in love with him. The little thingâs actually pining away for him.â She dropped the grapes and gave herself up to delicate mirth. âHe was taken away and disappeared. Perhaps she fainted and fell into the wet flower bed and spoiled her frock, when she first realized that he wasnât coming.â
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