Christine by Amelia Edith Huddleston Barr (top 5 ebook reader txt) π
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- Author: Amelia Edith Huddleston Barr
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Christine spent a restless, unhappy night. Norman had put before her a future that frightened her. She had seen the misery made by little wicked innuendoes half a dozen words long. Truly words could not kill her, but they could make life bitter and friendless, and there were women in the village she could neither conciliate, nor cope with, for the weapons they used were not in her armory. "Mither had a sharp tongue," she said softly, "but even she couldna cope wi' a lying tongue. Weel, there's words anent it, in the Good Book, and I'll seek them out, and they'll be helping me."
After all, the central trouble of her heart was neither her house, nor her neighbors, nor even her lover. Someway or other, they could and would be managed. But how was she to refill her empty purse? There was only one half-crown in it, and she had already found out the cruel uncertainty of literary work. It depended on too many people. Her novel was three-fourths done, but she reasoned that if men were so long on finding out whether they liked half a dozen verses, it would be all of a year, ere they got her novel well-examined. After realizing this condition, she said firmly, and with no evidence of unusual trial, "I can tak' to the fish, in the meantime. I havna outgrown my fisher dress, nor forgot my fisher-calls, and Culraine folk will help me sell, if I look to the boats for my bread. They dinna understand the writing business--nae wonder! There's few do! The Domine was saying it belongs to the mysteries o' this life. Weel, I'll get my pleasure out o' it, and the fish are ay sure to come, and sure to be caught, and if I set mysel' to the business, I can beat the auldest and youngest o' the fisherwomen in the selling o' them."
When she came to this decision, the clock struck twelve, and she looked up at its face for a moment, and shook her head. "I canna sleep yet," she said, "and you needna be calling me. There's Cluny and Neil to think o', and dear me, wha' can Neil be hiding himsel'? He canna hae heard o' Mither's death, he would hae come here, and if he couldna come, he would hae written. There has been nae word, either, from that lass he married. She wrote seven lang pages o' faults and accusations again her lawful husband, and then let the matter drop, as if it was of no further consequence. I didn't answer her letter, and I am glad I didn't. And I canna write now, for I know no more anent her whereabouts, than I do anent Neil's. I wouldn't wonder if they are together in some heathen country, where men fight duels, and kill each other for an ugly word. In a case like that, it would be fair murder for poor Neil. I wish I knew where the misguided lad is! Norman and Neil had no marriage luck, and wha kens what my luck may be, in the way o' a husband!"
This intensely personal reflection claimed her whole attention. It was long since she had seen Cluny. Shortly before her mother's death, he had gone as supercargo on a large merchant steamer, bound for New Zealand. It was a most important post, and he had been promised, if successful, the first captaincy in the fleet of passenger steamers carrying between England and the United States, that was vacant. Before leaving on this long trip to New Zealand, he had only managed to see Christine for three hours. He had reached Culraine at eight o'clock. He had run like a deer the mile and quarter which lay between the railway station and the Ruleson cottage, reaching his goal just as Christine finished reading a goodnight psalm to her mother. She had heard his steps afar off, it had seemed as if the comforting words were read to them--then she was at the open door, and they met in each other's arms.
Three hours of pure, perfect happiness had followed. Cluny went first to Margot's side. He knew it was the last time he could ever stand there. In this world they would see each other no more, and he was sorrowfully shocked and touched by the change in the handsome woman, once so vibrant and full of life. Sometimes they had not been very good friends, but this white, frail image, stretching out hands full of pleasure and goodwill to him--this gentle mother of the beloved Christine, won in a moment all his best sympathies. He promised her everything she asked, and then she sent him away with her blessing.
So it had been three hours of marvelous happiness. They had been content to forget all things but the joy of each other's presence. To the last possible minute he had remained with her, and their hopeful farewell had not been dimmed by a single tear. Since that night, she had sent no anxious worrying thoughts after him. From every port at which his ship touched, he had written her long, loving letters, and now she was beginning to expect his return. Any day she might have a letter from him, dated Liverpool or Glasgow.
"Lat them talk," she said with a little defiant laugh. "Lat their tongues tak' their ain ill-way, I'm not feared. There's Norman at my side, and the Domine not far off, and God aboon us all. I'll speak to Norman anent the fishing, and if needs be, I can kipper the herring as weel as Mither did." Then in a moment a wonderful change came over her, the angry scorn of her attitude, and the proud smile on her handsome face vanished. She clasped her hands, and with the light of unconquerable love on her face, she said with tender eagerness--"What does she do now? Oh dear God, what is Mither doing now? I canna tell. I canna tell, but it is Thy will, I'm sure o' that." Then the loving tears that followed this attitude washed away all traces of her scorn and anger, and she lay down with prayer on her lips, and fell sweetly asleep.
CHAPTER XII
NEIL'S RETURN HOME
They that sin, are enemies to their own life.--Tobit, xii, 10.
But Thou sparest all, for they are Thine, O Lord, Thou Lover of
Souls.--Wisdom of Solomon, xi, 26.
Tomorrow is always another day, always a new day, and as long as we live, always our day. It will bring us our little freight of good or evil, and we must accept it, our salvation being that we have the power of turning the evil into good, by the manner in which we accept it. When Christine awoke in the morning, she awoke all at once. No faculty of the Inner Woman dozed or lingered, every sense of the physical woman was attent, even sight--which often delays after its sister senses are conscious--promptly lifted its curtains, and Christine knew in a moment that she was _all there_, every sense and faculty alert, and ready for whatever the new day brought her.
She thought first of the trouble that Jessy was likely to make. "The maist o' the women will side wi' Jessy," she thought, "not because they like her, but because they dearly like a quarrel. I'll not quarrel with them. I'll bide at hame, and if they come up here, I'll bolt the doors on them. That's settled. I can neither keep back, nor hurry forward Cluny, sae I'll just put him in God's care, and leave him there. Neil has ta'en himsel' out o' my kindness and knowledge, I can only ask God to gie his angel a charge concerning him. The great queston is, how am I to get my bread and tea? There's plenty o' potatoes in the house, and a pennyworth o' fish will make me a meal. And I am getting a few eggs from the hens now, but there's this and that unaccountable thing wanted every day; and I hae just two-and-sixpence half-penny left. Weel! I'll show my empty purse to the Lord o' heaven and earth, and I'm not doubting but that He will gie me a' that is gude for me."
She put down her tea cup decisively to this declaration, and then rose, tidied her house and herself, and sat down to her novel. With a smile she opened her manuscript, and looked at what she had accomplished. "You tiresome young woman," she said to her heroine. "You'll hae to make up your mind vera soon, now, whether ye'll hae Sandy Gilhaize, or Roy Brock. I'll advise you to tak' Sandy, but I dinna think you'll do it, for you are a parfect daffodil o' vanity, and you think Roy Brock is mair of a gentleman than Sandy. I dinna ken what to do wi' you!----"
Here the door was noisily opened, and Jamie rushed in, crying "Auntie, Auntie! I hae three letters for you, and one o' them came a week ago."
"Oh Jamie, why did you not go to the post office before this?"
"I was getting ready for my exam----"
"Gie me the letters, laddie."
"And I could not get off till this morning."
There was a long letter from Cluny, but it was not the delayed letter; and when Jamie had gone home, she gave her whole heart to the reading of it. Then she turned anxiously to the other two. Both of them contained small checks for poems written so long ago that she had quite forgotten them. They were, however, veritable godsends, and she thanked God for them. Now she could go to work. She could even take time to make her foolish heroine do the proper thing. She felt as rich, with her two pounds, as if the two had been twenty. And Cluny was on his way home! Her letter had been posted at Auckland, and he was about to leave there, for home, when he wrote.
The novel now progressed rapidly. It was writing itself, and "The Daughter of the Sea" was all the company Christine wanted. Norman came up the hill once in the day, or he sent his son Will, in his place, and Jamie always ate his lunch beside Aunt Christine, and sometimes Judith called to see if there was any news of Cluny. Sunday was her day of trial. Ill-will can make itself felt, and never say a word, and Christine noticed that everyone drew away from her. If Judith, or Peter Brodie, or anyone spoke to her, they were at once set apart. Everyone else drew away, and the very girls to whom she had been kindest, drew furthest away.
It was, perhaps, a good thing for her. She only drew the closer to God, and her pen was a never-failing friend and companion. The days flew by, in the nights she slept and dreamed, and now and then the Domine came in, and comforted and strengthened her. Then she read him little chapters from her book, and he gave her much good advice, and sufficient praise to encourage her. So week after week went on, and though the whole village really disapproved of her retaining the Ruleson cottage, she nearly forgot the circumstance. And the book grew and grew in beauty, day by day, until on one lovely June afternoon, the pretty
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