Can I Live Again? by Tyrone Vincent Banks (android pdf ebook reader txt) đź“•
Excerpt from the book:
A retired and recently widowed USMC Sniper agrees to one last mission in the same area where his wife was killed in action. He must come to terms with his loss, accomplish his mission and then find a way to go on with his life.
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nightfall. He checked his ammunition and he had 9 bullets left. He remained on his perch as his eyes adjusted to the darkness. In the distance he could see the flicker of a match and a small campfire.
He repositioned himself several branches higher in the tree and waited patiently for his shot. He lined up his targets in his scope, made a few minor adjustments and squeezed off four shots and descended the tree quickly, sprinting to a perch slightly closer to the enemy camp site. As the enemy soldiers arrived at his previous location, he dropped 3 more and began to descend the tree when a bullet passed through his knee cap. He stifled his scream and slid off into the woods.
He then realized the seriousness of his situation. He had 2 bullets and 3 hostiles closing in on his position. One of the three appeared to be the leader as he shouted instructions to his men and they ran off and flanked his position. He was determined to survive this incident and had to think fast! He removed his ghillie suit and placed it on top of a small bush. He rolled into a nearby ditch and targeted the leader, taking him down with a head shot. He slid back deep into the bush and waited for his next target.
Another soldier spotted his ghillie suit and dropped down and crawled towards it. He was less that 6 feet away from his target and readied his handgun. Just as he was about to squeeze off his shot he was struck down by Leonard and he crawled forward to retrieve the fallen handgun. He grabbed the handgun just as the last enemy soldier approached and he rolled over and fired. The man dropped to his knees and fell forward.
Leonard lost conscious momentarily and when he awakened, he tied off his wounded knee with a shred of his ghillie suit and crawled to the warm campfire. He helped himself to the water and other provisions left behind and drifted off to sleep under his ghillie suit with his rifle across his chest and the handgun in his hand. At least he thought that he was sleeping when in all actuality he passed out until the extraction helicopter was heard in the morning. He awakened in the infirmary and his wife was there smiling as he opened his eyes.
He climbed into the shower after reliving those painful memories. The most painful memory being that of seeing his wife’s face, looking at him when he was in pain. He would have taken a dozen bullets in exchange for being there for her when she died.
***
Leonard sat in the living room looking out if the bay window waiting for his guest to arrive. At eight o’clock in the evening a dark blue government vehicle pulled into the driveway. Captain Cowen exited the car holding a briefcase and walked to the front of the vehicle. He wore an eye patch indicative of the injury that he had sustained almost a month earlier. A chaplain also exited and Cowen shook his head and he sat back down in the vehicle. Leonard stood and walked over to the door assisted by his cane. He placed his cane next to the door and opened it quickly.
Captain Cowen saluted and Leonard half-heartedly returned the salute and he entered the house.
“Leonard, I wish that I had dropped by for a regular off the record visit. But, you’ve delivered a few of these yourself…”
“Not many!” Leonard’s tone was cold and firm.
“I stand to be corrected Sir. I know that you’ve only lost one or two men while in command…”
“Captain, I’ve lost no men who were under my command!”
“Okay…you know, we…tried to stop her…we tried to stay, but our position was almost overrun…”
“Almost overrun, but not overrun! When I completed my last mission, I was in command of the unit and I stayed behind while my men got away safely. I stayed in those woods for one night and my men were back there at first light to extract me!! It took you almost one week to return? What were you doing during that time?”
“Leonard, I tried to get back there but I couldn’t get the authorization to return…you know there’s paperwork…there’s…”
Leonard walked away from the conversation and into the living room as Captain Cowen stood there speechless.
“Uncle Ron!”
Mikal ran over and gave the Marine a big hug.
“What’s up Mikey?”
“Nothing, just waiting for Mommy to come home! And don’t be mad at Daddy, he’s just mad about everything that’s happened but God said that it’ll be alright!”
“Yes, it’ll be alright!”
Cowen walked over to the couch and sat down in the chair next to it. He handed Leonard an envelope and he promptly opened it. He pulled out the ring first and then the charred cover of his wife’s small bible. He fought back the tears as he pulled out a stack of photographs and started reviewing them one by one. There were several photographs of the surrounding area and a final photograph in a sealed envelope marked “CLASSIFIED.” There was a photo of his wife’s dog tag and another of a portion of her finger with the wedding band still on it.
Leonard dropped the envelope and photographs and tried to hold back the tears. He was silent for a moment and then he looked directly into Cowen’s eye.
“I know that it’s not your fault. I said a few things out of anger but nothing that I can say can bring Manuela back home to me. You can go and we’ll be okay – trust me, I’m not going to do anything destructive, I know that she’d want me to live again, although I don’t know how that’s possible.”
“Leonard, I know that you’ll be okay, but I’m also here off the record to make a proposition. We are in need of your services.”
“What do I have to offer? More training manuals? A little consulting?”
“No Leonard, we need you out in the field. The photographs…”
Cowen picked up the photos and went through them and presented a few to Leonard.
“Do you recognize this area?”
Leonard took the photographs and sat down on the couch again.
“Yes, in the nineties I gathered intelligence in this region. There used to be several structures in a village just over this ridge. Man, just give me some time and I can gather my thoughts and draw up a map. Don’t they have the original maps that I submitted back then?”
“I wish that it was that easy, but those missions were classified, you were never really there. I’ll do some digging and see what I can find.”
“But what’s the point, none of this will bring Manuela back!”
“Leonard, we’ve been getting ambushed in that same area almost every week and we’re sick and tired of it! We need to know where the insurgents are coming from and how they seem to disappear at a moment’s notice. They’ve got something going there and we need to find out what it is. Look, just call me in the morning if you want in on this. I’ll understand if you want to distance yourself from this, but the truth is, we need you! To date you are one of the best non-deployed operators and you have a familiarity with that area. We’ve tried twice unsuccessfully to enter that area to gather intelligence but those guys always seem to find us and chase us away.”
“I’m all that Mikal has at this time and I don’t want him to be an orphan…”
“Daddy, we can go to Quantico! Don’t we have family there?”
Leonard smiled at Mikal and looked at Cowen.
“I’ll call you at zero six hundred hours to let you know.”
Cowen smiled at Leonard and shook his hand. Leonard pulled him close and embraced him.
“Thank you for stopping by!”
“No, thank you Leonard for letting me in. God Bless! See you later Mikey!”
“Bye Uncle Ron!”
Captain Cowen walked out of the house and the vehicle pulled out of the driveway.
“Alright Mikal! It’s bedtime!”
***
That night Leonard tossed and turned as his dreamscape filled in with various memories. The Iraqi terrain, the village, a door in the ground…all images that did not make sense at the time. Leonard was awakened suddenly and he went down to the kitchen. While drinking a bottle of water he walked over to the couch and sat down. He organized the photographs of the terrain on the top of the table. He looked at the gruesome picture of his wife’s finger. He examined the inside of the bible cover, reading the inscription to himself.
"Give Your Impossibilities to Jesus!"
He sat on the couch staring at the photographs until 6 o’clock in the morning. He picked up the phone and called Cowen.
“Cowen, we need to get to Quantico!”
***
Several hours later a government vehicle arrived at the front door of the Thomas residence. Leonard and Mikal got into the vehicle and they were whisked away. Less than 20 minutes later they arrived at a small airport and boarded a military helicopter.
“Cowen, meet me at the Pizza shop! I have something to show you!”
He then dialed another phone number and waited patiently for it to be answered.
“Hello, General – It’s Leonard; we’re flying in this afternoon. Yes, I took the mission. If Manuela is out there, I promise to bring her home! Yes, Mikal can’t wait to see you. Yes Sir, I’ll be at Velazio’s place by thirteen hundred hours! I look forward to it too Sir, I mean Dad, I’ll see you soon!”
At exactly one o’clock Leonard and Mikal arrived at the pizza shop and Mikal ran to his great uncle and gave him a hug. Leonard greeted his extended family and excused himself as Cowen sat in a booth wearing his civilian attire. He leaned into his cane and walked towards the table.
“Major…I mean Leonard; I’m glad that you’ve agreed to this!”
Cowen extended his hand and Leonard shook it.
“You knew that I would!”
“Actually, I did…”
“Good, I have a theory.”
Leonard placed the photographs on the table and started speaking.
“When we were in the area last I remember a gate near the border of the village. It was always under heavy guard. Well, I made it over there one day and looked down from the tree line. There was a hatch on the floor and every so often a group of men would enter or exit this hatch carrying several weapons. Well, being the good Marine that I was, I slipped into that hatch one night and it ran for about a quarter of a mile and do you know where it ended?”
Cowen shrugged his shoulders and replied, “The head?”
“No, it ended up right here!”
Leonard tapped one on the photos and Cowen picked it up.
“That
He repositioned himself several branches higher in the tree and waited patiently for his shot. He lined up his targets in his scope, made a few minor adjustments and squeezed off four shots and descended the tree quickly, sprinting to a perch slightly closer to the enemy camp site. As the enemy soldiers arrived at his previous location, he dropped 3 more and began to descend the tree when a bullet passed through his knee cap. He stifled his scream and slid off into the woods.
He then realized the seriousness of his situation. He had 2 bullets and 3 hostiles closing in on his position. One of the three appeared to be the leader as he shouted instructions to his men and they ran off and flanked his position. He was determined to survive this incident and had to think fast! He removed his ghillie suit and placed it on top of a small bush. He rolled into a nearby ditch and targeted the leader, taking him down with a head shot. He slid back deep into the bush and waited for his next target.
Another soldier spotted his ghillie suit and dropped down and crawled towards it. He was less that 6 feet away from his target and readied his handgun. Just as he was about to squeeze off his shot he was struck down by Leonard and he crawled forward to retrieve the fallen handgun. He grabbed the handgun just as the last enemy soldier approached and he rolled over and fired. The man dropped to his knees and fell forward.
Leonard lost conscious momentarily and when he awakened, he tied off his wounded knee with a shred of his ghillie suit and crawled to the warm campfire. He helped himself to the water and other provisions left behind and drifted off to sleep under his ghillie suit with his rifle across his chest and the handgun in his hand. At least he thought that he was sleeping when in all actuality he passed out until the extraction helicopter was heard in the morning. He awakened in the infirmary and his wife was there smiling as he opened his eyes.
He climbed into the shower after reliving those painful memories. The most painful memory being that of seeing his wife’s face, looking at him when he was in pain. He would have taken a dozen bullets in exchange for being there for her when she died.
***
Leonard sat in the living room looking out if the bay window waiting for his guest to arrive. At eight o’clock in the evening a dark blue government vehicle pulled into the driveway. Captain Cowen exited the car holding a briefcase and walked to the front of the vehicle. He wore an eye patch indicative of the injury that he had sustained almost a month earlier. A chaplain also exited and Cowen shook his head and he sat back down in the vehicle. Leonard stood and walked over to the door assisted by his cane. He placed his cane next to the door and opened it quickly.
Captain Cowen saluted and Leonard half-heartedly returned the salute and he entered the house.
“Leonard, I wish that I had dropped by for a regular off the record visit. But, you’ve delivered a few of these yourself…”
“Not many!” Leonard’s tone was cold and firm.
“I stand to be corrected Sir. I know that you’ve only lost one or two men while in command…”
“Captain, I’ve lost no men who were under my command!”
“Okay…you know, we…tried to stop her…we tried to stay, but our position was almost overrun…”
“Almost overrun, but not overrun! When I completed my last mission, I was in command of the unit and I stayed behind while my men got away safely. I stayed in those woods for one night and my men were back there at first light to extract me!! It took you almost one week to return? What were you doing during that time?”
“Leonard, I tried to get back there but I couldn’t get the authorization to return…you know there’s paperwork…there’s…”
Leonard walked away from the conversation and into the living room as Captain Cowen stood there speechless.
“Uncle Ron!”
Mikal ran over and gave the Marine a big hug.
“What’s up Mikey?”
“Nothing, just waiting for Mommy to come home! And don’t be mad at Daddy, he’s just mad about everything that’s happened but God said that it’ll be alright!”
“Yes, it’ll be alright!”
Cowen walked over to the couch and sat down in the chair next to it. He handed Leonard an envelope and he promptly opened it. He pulled out the ring first and then the charred cover of his wife’s small bible. He fought back the tears as he pulled out a stack of photographs and started reviewing them one by one. There were several photographs of the surrounding area and a final photograph in a sealed envelope marked “CLASSIFIED.” There was a photo of his wife’s dog tag and another of a portion of her finger with the wedding band still on it.
Leonard dropped the envelope and photographs and tried to hold back the tears. He was silent for a moment and then he looked directly into Cowen’s eye.
“I know that it’s not your fault. I said a few things out of anger but nothing that I can say can bring Manuela back home to me. You can go and we’ll be okay – trust me, I’m not going to do anything destructive, I know that she’d want me to live again, although I don’t know how that’s possible.”
“Leonard, I know that you’ll be okay, but I’m also here off the record to make a proposition. We are in need of your services.”
“What do I have to offer? More training manuals? A little consulting?”
“No Leonard, we need you out in the field. The photographs…”
Cowen picked up the photos and went through them and presented a few to Leonard.
“Do you recognize this area?”
Leonard took the photographs and sat down on the couch again.
“Yes, in the nineties I gathered intelligence in this region. There used to be several structures in a village just over this ridge. Man, just give me some time and I can gather my thoughts and draw up a map. Don’t they have the original maps that I submitted back then?”
“I wish that it was that easy, but those missions were classified, you were never really there. I’ll do some digging and see what I can find.”
“But what’s the point, none of this will bring Manuela back!”
“Leonard, we’ve been getting ambushed in that same area almost every week and we’re sick and tired of it! We need to know where the insurgents are coming from and how they seem to disappear at a moment’s notice. They’ve got something going there and we need to find out what it is. Look, just call me in the morning if you want in on this. I’ll understand if you want to distance yourself from this, but the truth is, we need you! To date you are one of the best non-deployed operators and you have a familiarity with that area. We’ve tried twice unsuccessfully to enter that area to gather intelligence but those guys always seem to find us and chase us away.”
“I’m all that Mikal has at this time and I don’t want him to be an orphan…”
“Daddy, we can go to Quantico! Don’t we have family there?”
Leonard smiled at Mikal and looked at Cowen.
“I’ll call you at zero six hundred hours to let you know.”
Cowen smiled at Leonard and shook his hand. Leonard pulled him close and embraced him.
“Thank you for stopping by!”
“No, thank you Leonard for letting me in. God Bless! See you later Mikey!”
“Bye Uncle Ron!”
Captain Cowen walked out of the house and the vehicle pulled out of the driveway.
“Alright Mikal! It’s bedtime!”
***
That night Leonard tossed and turned as his dreamscape filled in with various memories. The Iraqi terrain, the village, a door in the ground…all images that did not make sense at the time. Leonard was awakened suddenly and he went down to the kitchen. While drinking a bottle of water he walked over to the couch and sat down. He organized the photographs of the terrain on the top of the table. He looked at the gruesome picture of his wife’s finger. He examined the inside of the bible cover, reading the inscription to himself.
"Give Your Impossibilities to Jesus!"
He sat on the couch staring at the photographs until 6 o’clock in the morning. He picked up the phone and called Cowen.
“Cowen, we need to get to Quantico!”
***
Several hours later a government vehicle arrived at the front door of the Thomas residence. Leonard and Mikal got into the vehicle and they were whisked away. Less than 20 minutes later they arrived at a small airport and boarded a military helicopter.
“Cowen, meet me at the Pizza shop! I have something to show you!”
He then dialed another phone number and waited patiently for it to be answered.
“Hello, General – It’s Leonard; we’re flying in this afternoon. Yes, I took the mission. If Manuela is out there, I promise to bring her home! Yes, Mikal can’t wait to see you. Yes Sir, I’ll be at Velazio’s place by thirteen hundred hours! I look forward to it too Sir, I mean Dad, I’ll see you soon!”
At exactly one o’clock Leonard and Mikal arrived at the pizza shop and Mikal ran to his great uncle and gave him a hug. Leonard greeted his extended family and excused himself as Cowen sat in a booth wearing his civilian attire. He leaned into his cane and walked towards the table.
“Major…I mean Leonard; I’m glad that you’ve agreed to this!”
Cowen extended his hand and Leonard shook it.
“You knew that I would!”
“Actually, I did…”
“Good, I have a theory.”
Leonard placed the photographs on the table and started speaking.
“When we were in the area last I remember a gate near the border of the village. It was always under heavy guard. Well, I made it over there one day and looked down from the tree line. There was a hatch on the floor and every so often a group of men would enter or exit this hatch carrying several weapons. Well, being the good Marine that I was, I slipped into that hatch one night and it ran for about a quarter of a mile and do you know where it ended?”
Cowen shrugged his shoulders and replied, “The head?”
“No, it ended up right here!”
Leonard tapped one on the photos and Cowen picked it up.
“That
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