The Fall of Alice Brown by Alice Brown (a book to read txt) 📕

Uwwaaa.....

Oh, a new life has been born into the world. Mummy and daddy are so happy.

The doctor was nowhere to be seen. Must have fallen somewhere. So, the nurse take over. Her nametag read 'Teefall'. She grabbed the baby gracefully. But her legs weren't as graceful as her legs. She slipped and down she went. With me in her hands.  Thus, there goes my first fall in  in my first fall. Mummy used to say that I fell like the brown leaves outside the hospital window. Geez, does that mean  I fell gracefully. No, but she like to say it like that. Because she said it sound like a good opening sentence for a book. Whatever does that mean.

Well, enough about my first fall.  I think I already exhausted myself describing it. Oh, but I only wrote one paragraph. I t felt like an hour had passed since i wrote the first sentence.  Maybe what mummy said is true. I need to use her 'good-opening-sentence'. Let's start again, shall we.

I fell like the brown leaves outside the hospital window. Oh, so gracefully.

Nurse Teefall quickly cushioned my fall with her strong (and graceful) arms. Mummy shrieked, 'Oh, my baby!!!! Oh, dear. I think I'm gonna faint, honey.' The 'honey' she referred to is daddy, who apparently has fainted and was lying on the floor. Mummy said she was so used to hug daddy's arm for comfort that she, without thinking, bent down from the bed to reach daddy's arm...and yep, she fell. 

So, that's pretty all about my first day on Earth. Everyone in my family just fell the minute I arrived here, including Nurse Teefall. And by that, I mean they just fell in love with me at first sight. So, that's how Nurse Teefall slipped. She couldn't take her eye off me.

Alice Brown 

"Smart, active, friendly, alway cheerful. Has  a great smile. Always giving feedback in groups activities (even when not needed... must control that a little bit so she won't annoy people for the rest of her life without knowing it). Helpful and quick to offer a lending hand to those in need. And she's cute -innocent looking."

And that, my friends, is the comment that my first grade teacher wrote in my report book. 

But...

That is not all. For she had scribbled the last sentence (not crossed out -but scribbled...literally). And she even took the trouble to put some nice looking stickers over that last sentence. When asked why, she said it was some kind of reward. 

Mummy was so proud to hear this. Daddy too was so proud. He kept dabbing his eyes with a tissue -it was like he was watching a very sad drama. 

Out of boredom (while mummy and daddy kept saying 'ooohhh...look at all that stickers...aren't they adorable), I picked out one of the report books that were stacked on the teacher desk. I started flicking throuh it. There's no stickers in this one. I looked through another one. No stickers too.

Seeing this, my parents also began starting to flick through the stacks of reports books. But they did it in such a flurry of haste that the neats stacks began to tumble down. My first grade teacher's face turns a bright red. Oh, how I wish I hadn't start flicking that report books. I've seen that face bright red face countless of time and it's only a matter of seconds before it turns a deep red. And believe me, you don't wanna be around when that happen. I must make a clean exit out of this before anything ugly happens. A simple and a quick thank you (and apologizing for taking her time -but, you know what we're really apologizing for) will do the trick.

I stand up pretty fast and meaning to bow after that...but before I could bow, my leg caught the chair's leg. And down I went. Head first into the stacks...I mean, the piles of report books. BAM!

And in that process, I managed to knock down her favourite mug break. CRASH! So, now her mug break does literally break. The coffee spilled all over the report books. Every pages the coffee touched turns a delicious brown. Yeah, now everyone can have their report book and a sample of teacher's favourite coffee. Way to go, Alice. Sarcastic laugh.

As on cue, mummy and daddy looked at each other and nodded their head as in agreement. Mummy stashed my report book into her handbag -which unbelievingly was the only one that hadn't turn brown...in spite of my last name. And together they hauled me off the teacher's desk, mumbled something to the now deep-red-face teacher and out they sailed through the door. In just a few minutes, I was safely buckled to my seat and heading home. 

In the car, mummy said something about celebrating with Dominoes and daddy kept hitting the honk accidentally in his attempt to break off from his shock -now and then he muttered 'I flicked through all that report books and not one had a sticker, much less a row of stickers.' 

Yeah, I noticed that too. Why is that? Something smells fishy. I'm not the smartest kid in class so there should be no reason for the stickers that is only in my report book. In fact, no one seems to take me seriously as I am too clumsy it make me look stupid.

Daddy dropped me and mummy at home while he go out to pick some Dominoes -he doesn't believe in the delivery-service. While mummy was busy in the kitchen, I took out the report book from her handbag in the living room and ran upstairs to my bedroom.

There, I peel off the neat row of stickers over the scribbled last sentence one by one painstakingly -making sure not to tear any scratch of the paper. In my 7 years old's mind, it was like operating for a surgery where one small mistake can send the poor old man to Heaven. I was sweating furiously. I started to wish there was a nurse beside me -wiping my foreheads tenderly. 

Then, I switched on my study lamp and held the paper to it. Now it was like a CSI scence. I look very closely at the scribbled last sentence. Slowly but surely, I made out the letter A-n-d-w-h...

After a full 10 minutes gone by, I was lying flat on the floor because I tripped myself trying to rush out the door and tell mummy about the-secrets-behind-the-oh-so-adorable-stickers.

You wanna know what she wrote?

"And what I mean by that is she looks rather dumb falling all the time like that. Seriously, who fall down all the time...oh, no, what have I written!!!"

So, seeing that I have fallen down now...I don't think I should tell mummy. Or anyone else. 

 'WAAARRRRGGGGHHH!!!!'

'Daddy!!! Its hurt....make them stop...daddy, please...'

But I should have known better not to look for him at time of distress because he always fainted already at a time like this. Well, you can't blame me. No one can think clearly when your leg is twisted the wrong way. Mummy was in the other room -calling for an ambulance. She sound furious.

'What do you mean you can't get here immediately??? You got no ambulance left??? What??? The last ambulance was sent for a pregnant woman??? Why do you bother about a life that doesn't exist yet??? Get here now!!! AND STEP ON IT!!!'

And you double can't think clearly when your only child's leg is twisted the wrong way. A baby that isn't born yet (wich is called a feutus) already had a beating heart. So, the ambulance was right to bother about the-not-yet-born-life-but-does-still-exist. I heard mummy slammed the phone down.

She must be upset because our plan to go to the new shopping mall in town was ruined by my greatest fall so far. Crap, why do I have to fall down today out of all day. Well, actually..there's no use complaining why it's today because I fall everyday. 

Suddenly, mummy lifted me and tucked me into the car. I shrierked a little as mummy accidentally hit my bad leg on the car door.

'Oh, sorry, darling. We're in a hurry!' Her face was set. Determination. And...sometimes a bad sign.

'Mummy, where we're going? What about daddy?' I asked. Panicking because I know her driving skill well enough. And in her state, it will only get worse. She'll be sending us to our graves sooner than we think.

'Yes...daddy,'she seemed to be dazed for a minute before snapping out of that. She marched right up to daddy and slapped him hard in the face. No mercy shown. My lips unwillingly turned up a little at the corner. Yeah, that's one scence you don't get to see everyday. 

Text: Alice Brown
Images: Bookrix
Editing: Alice Brown
Publication Date: 12-08-2014

All Rights Reserved

Dedication:
to alice bown, of course (which alice brown? figure that out yourself)