Samantha at the World's Fair by Marietta Holley (ebook and pdf reader txt) đź“•
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- Author: Marietta Holley
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And then there wuz the original copy of the first books relatin' to America, over one hundred of 'em, obtained from the Vatican at Rome, and museums, and libraries, in London, and Paris, and Madrid, and Washington, D.C. They are writ by Lords, and Cardinals, and Bishops, way back as fur as fourteen hundred and ninety-three.
Then there wuz quaint maps and charts of the newly discovered country, lookin' some as our first maps would of Mars, if the United States had made up its mind to annex that planet, and Uncle Sam had jest begun to lay it out into countries.
Then there are the portraits of Columbus. Good creeter! it seemed a pity to see so many of 'em—his enemies might keep right on abusin' him, and say that he wuz double-faced, or sixty or eighty faced, when I know, and they all ort to know, that he wuz straightforward and stiddy as t[Pg 357]he sun. Poor creeter! it wuz too bad that there should be so many of 'em.
[Pg 358]
Then there are models and photographs of statutes and monuments of him, and the very stun and clay that them tall monuments is made of, mebby they are the very stuns that hurt his bare feet, and the clay the very same his tears had fell on, as he'd throw himself down heart-weary on his lonesome pilgrimages. I dare presoom to say that he would lay his head down under some wayside tree and cry—I hain't a doubt on't.
When I thought it over, how much had been said about Columbus even durin' the last year in Jonesville and Chicago, to say nothin' about the rest of the world, it wuz a treat indeed to see the first printed allusion that wuz ever made to Columbus, about three months after Columbus arrived in Portugal, March fifteenth, fourteen hundred and ninety-three. It was writ by Mr. Carvugal, Spanish Cardinal.
In it Mr. Carvugal says—
"And Christ placed under their rule (Ferdinand and Isabella) the Fortunate Islands."
I sez to Josiah, "I guess if Mr. Carvugal was sot down here to-day, and see what he would see here, he would be apt to think indeed they wuz Fortunate Islands."
But as I said that I heard a voice a-sayin'—
[Pg 359]
"Who is Mr. Carvugal, Samantha?"
I recognized the voice, and I sez, "Why, Irena Flanders, is it you? I have been to see you; I hearn you wuz sick."
"Yes," sez she, "I wuz beat out, and I thought I couldn't stand it; but I feel better to-day, so we have been to the Forestry Buildin', and thought we would come in here."
But I see that she didn't feel as I did about the immortal relics, but she kinder pretended to, as folks will; and Elam and Josiah went to talkin' about hayin', and wondered how the crops wuz a-gittin' along in Jonesville. But I kep on a-lookin' round and listenin' to Irena's remarks about her symptoms with one half of my mind, or about half, and examinin' the relics with the other half.
There wuz a little Latin book with queer wood-cuts, "Concernin' Islands lately discovered," published in Switzerland in 1494; under the title it begun—"Christopher Colum—"
It made me mad to hear that good, noble creeter's name cut off and demeaned, and I told Irena so.
And she sez, "That's what little Benjy calls our old white duck; his name is Columbus, but he calls it Colum."
[Pg 360]
She is a great duck-raiser; but I didn't thank her for alludin' to barn-yard fowls in such a time as this.
Wall, there wuz the first life of Columbus ever writ, by his son Farnendo.
And a book relatin' to the namin' of America. I thought it would been a good plan if there had been a few more about that, and had named it Columbia—jest what it ort to be, and not let another man take the honor that should have been Christopher's.
But I meditated on what a queer place this old world wuz, and how nateral for one man to toil and work, and another step in and take the pay for it; so it didn't surprise me a mite, but it madded me some.
Then there wuz the histories of the different cities where he wuz born, and the different places where his bones repose.
Poor creeter! they fit then because they didn't want his bones, and they starved him so that he wuzn't much besides bones, and they didn't want his bones anyway, and they put chains onto them poor old bones, and led 'em off to prison.
And now hull cities and countries would hold it their chief honor to lie about it, and claim the credit of givin' 'em burial. O dear suz! O dear me!
Wall, there wuz one of the anchors, and the canvas used by Columbus on board his flag-ship.
[Pg 361]
The very canvas that the wind swelled out and wafted the great Discoverer. O my heart, think on't!
And then there wuz the ruins of the little town of Isabella, the first established in the new world, brung lately from San Domingo by a man-of-war.
And then there wuz the first church bell that ever rung in America, presented to the town of Isabella by King Ferdinand.
Oh, if I could have swung out with that old bell, and my senses could have took in the sights and seens the sound had echoed over! What a sight—what a sight it would have been!
Ringin' out barbarism and ringin' in the newer religion; ringin' out, as time went on, old simple ways, and idees—mebby bringin' in barbarous ways; swingin' back and forth, to and fro; ringin' in now, I hope and pray, the era of love and justice, goodwill to man and woman.
Wall, I wuz almost lost in my thoughts in hangin' over that old bell. It had took me back into the dim old green forest isles and onbroken wilderness, when I heard a bystander a-sayin' to another one—"There is Columbuses relations; there is the Duke of Veragua."
[Pg 362]
And on lookin' up, I indeed see Columbuses own relation on his own side, with his wife and daughter.
The relation on Columbuses side wuz a middlin' good-lookin' and a good-natered lookin' man, no taller than Josiah, with blue eyes, gray hair, and short whiskers.
His wife wuz a good-lookin', plump woman, some younger apparently than he wuz, and the daughter wuz pretty and fresh-lookin' as a pink rose.
I liked their looks first rate.
And jest the minute my eyes fell on 'em, so quick my intellect moves, I knew what was incumbent on me to do.
It wuz my place, it would be expected of me—I must welcome them to America; I must, in the name of my own dignity, and the power of the Nation, gin 'em the freedom of Jonesville. I must not slight them for their own sakes, and their noble ancestors.
One human weakness might be discovered in me by a clost observer in that rapt hour: I didn't really know how to address the wife of the Duke.
And I whispered to Irena Flanders, and, sez I, "If a man is a duke, what would his wife be called?" Sez I, "She'd feel hurt if I slighted her."
[Pg 363]
And sez she, "If one is a duke, the other would naterally be called a drake."
[Pg 364]
I knew better than that—she hain't any too smart by nater, and her mind runs to fowls, what there is of it.
But my Josiah heard the inquiry, and sez he—
"I should call her a duck;" and he continued, with his eyes riveted on the beautiful face of the Duke's daughter—
"That pretty girl is a duck, and no mistake."
But I sez, "Hush; that would be too familiar and also too rural."
I hain't ashamed of the country—no, indeed, I am proud on't; still I knew that it wuz, specially in June, noted for its tender greenness.
And sez I, "I'll trust to the hour to inspire me; I'll sail out as his great ancestor did, and trust to Providence to help me out."
So I advanced onto 'em, and I thought, as I went, if you call a man by the hull of his name he hadn't ort to complain; so I sez with a deep curchey—I knew a plain curchey wouldn't do justice to the occasion.
So I gracefully took hold of my alpaca skirt with both hands and held it out slightly, and curchied from ten to fourteen inches, I should judge.
I wanted it deep enough to show the profound esteem and honor in which I held him, and not deep enough so's to give him the false idee that I wuz a professional dancer, or opera singer, or anything of that sort.
[Pg 365]
I judged that my curchey wuz jest about right.
[Pg 366]
Imegatly after my curchey I sez, "Don Christobel Colon De Toledo De La Cerda Y Gante," and then I paused for breath, while the world waited—
"I welcome you to this country—I salute you in the name of Jonesville and America."
And then agin I made that noble, beautiful curchey.
He bowed so low that if a basin of water had been sot on his back it would have run down over his head.
Sez I, "The man in whose veins flows a drop of the precious blood of the Hero who discovered us is near and dear to the heart of the new world."
Sez I, "I feel that we can't do too much to honor you, and I hereby offer you the freedom of Jonesville."
And sez I, "I would have brung it in a paper collar box if I'd thought on't, but I hope you will overlook the omission, and take it verbal."
Agin he bowed that dretful perlite, courteous bow, and agin I put in that noble curchey.
It wuz a hour long to be remembered by any one who wuz fortunate enough to witness it; and sez he—
[Pg 367]
"I am sensible of the distinguished honor you do me, Madam; accept my profound thanks."
I then turned to his wife, and sez I, "Miss Christobel Colon Toledo Ohio—"
I got kinder mixed up here by my emotions, and the efforts my curcheys had cost me; I hadn't ort to mentioned the word Ohio.
But I waded out agin—"De La Cerda Y Gante—
"As a pardner of Columbus, and also as a female woman, I bid you also welcome to America in the name of woman, and I tender to you also the freedom of Jonesville, and Loontown, and Zoar.
"And you," sez I, "Honorable Maria Del Pillow Colon Y Aguilera—
"You sweet little creeter you, I'd love to have you come and stay with me a week right along, you pretty thing." Sez I, "How proud your Grandpa would be of you if he wuz here!"
My feelin's had carried me away, and I felt that I had lost the formal, polite tone of etiquette that I had intended to carry on through the interview.
But she wuz so awful pretty, I couldn't help it; but I felt that it wuz best to terminate it, so I bowed low, a-holdin' out my alpaca skirt kinder noble in one hand and my green veil in the other, some like a banner, and backed off.
[Pg 368]
They too bowed deep, and sorter backed off too. Oh, what a hour for America!
Josiah put out his arm anxiously, for I wuz indeed a-movin' backwards into a glass case of relics, and the great seen terminated.
Miss Flanders and Elam had gone—they shrunk from publicity. I guess they wuz afraid it wuz too great a job, the ceremony attendin' our givin' these noble foreigners the freedom of our native town.
But they
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