An Old-fashioned Girl by Louisa M. Alcott (book club suggestions TXT) π
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feeling that something was coming and rather glad to have it over and done with.
"Nothing particular. Trix treats Tom shamefully, and he bears it like a lamb. I tell him to break his engagement, and not be worried so; but he won't, because she has been jilted once and he thinks it 's such a mean thing to do."
"Perhaps she 'll jilt him."
"I 've no doubt she will, if anything better comes along. But Trix is getting passe, and I should n't wonder if she kept him to his word, just out of perversity, if nothing else."
"Poor Tom, what a fate!" said Polly with what was meant to be a comical groan; but it sounded so tragical that she saw it would n't pass, and hastened to hide the failure by saying, with a laugh, "If you call Trix passe at twenty-three, what shall we all be at twenty-five?" "Utterly done with, and laid upon the shelf. I feel so already, for I don't get half the attention I used to have, and the other night I heard Maud and Grace wondering why those old girls 'did n't stay at home, and give them a chance.'"
"How is Maudie?"
"Pretty well, but she worries me by her queer tastes and notions. She loves to go into the kitchen and mess, she hates to study, and said right before the Vincents that she should think it would be great fun to be a beggar-girl, to go round with a basket, it must be so interesting to see what you 'd get."
"Minnie said the other day she wished she was a pigeon so she could paddle in the puddles and not fuss about rubbers."
"By the way, when is her uncle coming back?" asked Fanny, who could n't wait any longer and joyfully seized the opening Polly made for her.
"I 'm sure I don't know."
"Nor care, I suppose, you hard-hearted thing."
"Why, Fan, what do you mean?"
"I 'm not blind, my dear, neither is Tom, and when a young gentleman cuts a call abruptly short, and races after a young lady, and is seen holding her hand at the quietest corner of the park, and then goes travelling all of a sudden, we know what it means if you don't."
"Who got up that nice idea, I should like to know?" demanded Polly, as Fanny stopped for breath.
"Now don't be affected, Polly, but just tell me, like a dear, has n't he proposed?"
"No, he has n't."
"Don't you think he means to?"
"I don't think he 'll ever say a word to me."
"Well, I am surprised!" And Fanny drew a long breath, as if a load was off her mind. Then she added in a changed tone: "But don't you love him, Polly?"
"No."
"Truly?"
"Truly, Fan."
Neither spoke for a minute, but the heart of one of them beat joyfully and the dusk hid a very happy face.
"Don't you think he cared for you, dear?" asked Fanny, presently. "I don't mean to be prying, but I really thought he did."
"That 's not for me to say, but if it is so, it 's only a passing fancy and he 'll soon get over it."
"Do tell me all about it; I 'm so interested, and I know something has happened, I hear it in your voice, for I can't see your face."
"Do you remember the talk we once had after reading one of Miss Edgeworth's stories about not letting one's lovers come to a declaration if one did n't love them?"
"Yes."
"And you girls said it was n't proper, and I said it was honest, anyway. Well, I always meant to try it if I got a chance, and I have. Mind you, I don't say Mr. Sydney loved me, for he never said so, and never will, now, but I did fancy he rather liked me and might do more if I did n't show him that it was of no use."
"And you did?" cried Fanny, much excited.
"I just gave him a hint and he took it. He meant to go away before that, so don't think his heart is broken, or mind what silly tattlers say. I did n't like his meeting me so much and told him so by going another way. He understood, and being a gentleman, made no fuss. I dare say he thought I was a vain goose, and laughed at me for my pains, like Churchill in 'Helen.'"
"No, he would n't; He 'd like it and respect you for doing it. But, Polly, it would have been a grand thing for you."
"I can't sell myself for an establishment."
"Mercy! What an idea!"
"Well, that 's the plain English of half your fashionable matches. I 'm 'odd,' you know, and prefer to be an independent spinster and teach music all my days."
"Ah, but you won't. You were made for a nice, happy home of your own, and I hope you 'll get it, Polly, dear," said Fanny warmly, feeling so grateful to Polly, that she found it hard not to pour out all her secret at once.
"I hope I may; but I doubt it," answered Polly in a tone that made Fanny wonder if she, too, knew what heartache meant.
"Something troubles you, Polly, what is it? Confide in me, as I do in you," said Fanny tenderly, for all the coldness she had tried to hide from Polly, had melted in the sudden sunshine that had come to her.
"Do you always?" asked her friend, leaning forward with an irresistible desire to win back the old-time love and confidence, too precious to be exchanged for a little brief excitement or the barren honor of "bagging a bird," to use Trix's elegant expression. Fanny understood it then, and threw herself into Polly's arms, crying, with a shower of grateful tears; "Oh, my dear! my dear! did you do it for my sake?"
And Polly held her close, saying in that tender voice of hers, "I did n't mean to let a lover part this pair of friends if I could help it."
CHAPTER XV BREAKERS AHEAD
GOING into the Shaws' one evening, Polly found Maud sitting on the stairs, with a troubled face.
"Oh, Polly, I 'm so glad you 've come!" cried the little girl, running to hug her.
"What's the matter, deary?"
"I don't know; something dreadful must have happened, for mamma and Fan are crying together upstairs, papa is shut up in the library, and Tom is raging round like a bear, in the dining-room."
"I guess it is n't anything very bad. Perhaps mamma is sicker than usual, or papa worried about business, or Tom in some new scrape. Don't look so frightened, Maudie, but come into the parlor and see what I 've got for you," said Polly, feeling that there was trouble of some sort in the air, but trying to cheer the child, for her little face was full of a sorrowful anxiety, that went to Polly's heart.
"I don't think I can like anything till I know what the matter is," answered Maud. "It 's something horrid, I 'm sure, for when papa came home, he went up to mamma's room, and talked ever so long, and mamma cried very loud, and when I tried to go in, Fan would n't let me, and she looked scared and strange. I wanted to go to papa when he came down, but the door was locked, and he said, 'Not now, my little girl,' and then I sat here waiting to see what would happen, and Tom came home. But when I ran to tell him, he said, 'Go away, and don't bother,' and just took me by the shoulders and put me out. Oh, dear! everything is so queer and horrid, I don't know what to do."
Maud began to cry, and Polly sat down on the stairs beside her, trying to comfort her, while her own thoughts were full of a vague fear. All at once the dining-room door opened, and Tom's head appeared. A single glance showed Polly that something was the matter, for the care and elegance which usually marked his appearance were entirely wanting. His tie was under one ear, his hair in a toss, the cherished moustache had a neglected air, and his face an expression both excited, ashamed, and distressed; even his voice betrayed disturbance, for instead of the affable greeting he usually bestowed upon the young lady, he seemed to have fallen back into the bluff tone of his boyish days, and all he said was, "Hullo, Polly."
"How do you do?" answered Polly.
"I 'm in a devil of a mess, thank you; send that chicken up stairs, and come in and hear about it," he said, as if he had been longing to tell some one, and welcomed prudent Polly as a special providence.
"Go up, deary, and amuse yourself with this book, and these ginger snaps that I made for you, there 's a good child," whispered Polly, as Maud rubbed away her tears, and stared at Tom with round, inquisitive eyes.
"You 'll tell me all about it, by and by, won't you?" she whispered, preparing to obey.
"If I may," answered Polly.
Maud departed with unexpected docility, and Polly went into the dining-room, where Tom was wandering about in a restless way. If he had been "raging like a bear," Polly would n't have cared, she was so pleased that he wanted her, and so glad to be a confidante, as she used to be in the happy old days, that she would joyfully have faced a much more formidable person than reckless Tom.
"Now, then, what is it?" she said, coming straight to the point.
"Guess."
"You 've killed your horse racing."
"Worse than that."
"You are suspended again."
"Worse than that."
"Trix has run away with somebody," cried Polly, with a gasp.
"Worse still."
"Oh, Tom, you have n't horse whipped or shot any one?"
"Came pretty near blowing my own brains out but you see I did n't."
"I can't guess; tell me, quick."
"Well, I 'm expelled."
Tom paused on the rug as he gave the answer, and looked at Polly to see how she took it. To his surprise she seemed almost relieved, and after a minute silence, said, soberly, "That 's bad, very bad; but it might have been worse."
"It is worse;" and Tom walked away again with a despairing sort of groan.
"Don't knock the chairs about, but come and sit down, and tell me quietly."
"Can't do it."
"Well, go on, then. Are you truly expelled? Can't it be made up? What did you do?"
"It 's a true bill this time. I just had a row with the Chapel watchman, and knocked him down. If it was a first offence, I might have got off; but you see I 've had no end of narrow escapes, and this was my last chance; I 've lost it, and now there 'll be the dickens to pay. I knew it was all up with me, so I did n't wait to be turned out, but just took myself off."
"What will your father say?"
"It will come hard on the governor, but the worst of it is" there Tom stopped, and stood a minute in the middle of
"Nothing particular. Trix treats Tom shamefully, and he bears it like a lamb. I tell him to break his engagement, and not be worried so; but he won't, because she has been jilted once and he thinks it 's such a mean thing to do."
"Perhaps she 'll jilt him."
"I 've no doubt she will, if anything better comes along. But Trix is getting passe, and I should n't wonder if she kept him to his word, just out of perversity, if nothing else."
"Poor Tom, what a fate!" said Polly with what was meant to be a comical groan; but it sounded so tragical that she saw it would n't pass, and hastened to hide the failure by saying, with a laugh, "If you call Trix passe at twenty-three, what shall we all be at twenty-five?" "Utterly done with, and laid upon the shelf. I feel so already, for I don't get half the attention I used to have, and the other night I heard Maud and Grace wondering why those old girls 'did n't stay at home, and give them a chance.'"
"How is Maudie?"
"Pretty well, but she worries me by her queer tastes and notions. She loves to go into the kitchen and mess, she hates to study, and said right before the Vincents that she should think it would be great fun to be a beggar-girl, to go round with a basket, it must be so interesting to see what you 'd get."
"Minnie said the other day she wished she was a pigeon so she could paddle in the puddles and not fuss about rubbers."
"By the way, when is her uncle coming back?" asked Fanny, who could n't wait any longer and joyfully seized the opening Polly made for her.
"I 'm sure I don't know."
"Nor care, I suppose, you hard-hearted thing."
"Why, Fan, what do you mean?"
"I 'm not blind, my dear, neither is Tom, and when a young gentleman cuts a call abruptly short, and races after a young lady, and is seen holding her hand at the quietest corner of the park, and then goes travelling all of a sudden, we know what it means if you don't."
"Who got up that nice idea, I should like to know?" demanded Polly, as Fanny stopped for breath.
"Now don't be affected, Polly, but just tell me, like a dear, has n't he proposed?"
"No, he has n't."
"Don't you think he means to?"
"I don't think he 'll ever say a word to me."
"Well, I am surprised!" And Fanny drew a long breath, as if a load was off her mind. Then she added in a changed tone: "But don't you love him, Polly?"
"No."
"Truly?"
"Truly, Fan."
Neither spoke for a minute, but the heart of one of them beat joyfully and the dusk hid a very happy face.
"Don't you think he cared for you, dear?" asked Fanny, presently. "I don't mean to be prying, but I really thought he did."
"That 's not for me to say, but if it is so, it 's only a passing fancy and he 'll soon get over it."
"Do tell me all about it; I 'm so interested, and I know something has happened, I hear it in your voice, for I can't see your face."
"Do you remember the talk we once had after reading one of Miss Edgeworth's stories about not letting one's lovers come to a declaration if one did n't love them?"
"Yes."
"And you girls said it was n't proper, and I said it was honest, anyway. Well, I always meant to try it if I got a chance, and I have. Mind you, I don't say Mr. Sydney loved me, for he never said so, and never will, now, but I did fancy he rather liked me and might do more if I did n't show him that it was of no use."
"And you did?" cried Fanny, much excited.
"I just gave him a hint and he took it. He meant to go away before that, so don't think his heart is broken, or mind what silly tattlers say. I did n't like his meeting me so much and told him so by going another way. He understood, and being a gentleman, made no fuss. I dare say he thought I was a vain goose, and laughed at me for my pains, like Churchill in 'Helen.'"
"No, he would n't; He 'd like it and respect you for doing it. But, Polly, it would have been a grand thing for you."
"I can't sell myself for an establishment."
"Mercy! What an idea!"
"Well, that 's the plain English of half your fashionable matches. I 'm 'odd,' you know, and prefer to be an independent spinster and teach music all my days."
"Ah, but you won't. You were made for a nice, happy home of your own, and I hope you 'll get it, Polly, dear," said Fanny warmly, feeling so grateful to Polly, that she found it hard not to pour out all her secret at once.
"I hope I may; but I doubt it," answered Polly in a tone that made Fanny wonder if she, too, knew what heartache meant.
"Something troubles you, Polly, what is it? Confide in me, as I do in you," said Fanny tenderly, for all the coldness she had tried to hide from Polly, had melted in the sudden sunshine that had come to her.
"Do you always?" asked her friend, leaning forward with an irresistible desire to win back the old-time love and confidence, too precious to be exchanged for a little brief excitement or the barren honor of "bagging a bird," to use Trix's elegant expression. Fanny understood it then, and threw herself into Polly's arms, crying, with a shower of grateful tears; "Oh, my dear! my dear! did you do it for my sake?"
And Polly held her close, saying in that tender voice of hers, "I did n't mean to let a lover part this pair of friends if I could help it."
CHAPTER XV BREAKERS AHEAD
GOING into the Shaws' one evening, Polly found Maud sitting on the stairs, with a troubled face.
"Oh, Polly, I 'm so glad you 've come!" cried the little girl, running to hug her.
"What's the matter, deary?"
"I don't know; something dreadful must have happened, for mamma and Fan are crying together upstairs, papa is shut up in the library, and Tom is raging round like a bear, in the dining-room."
"I guess it is n't anything very bad. Perhaps mamma is sicker than usual, or papa worried about business, or Tom in some new scrape. Don't look so frightened, Maudie, but come into the parlor and see what I 've got for you," said Polly, feeling that there was trouble of some sort in the air, but trying to cheer the child, for her little face was full of a sorrowful anxiety, that went to Polly's heart.
"I don't think I can like anything till I know what the matter is," answered Maud. "It 's something horrid, I 'm sure, for when papa came home, he went up to mamma's room, and talked ever so long, and mamma cried very loud, and when I tried to go in, Fan would n't let me, and she looked scared and strange. I wanted to go to papa when he came down, but the door was locked, and he said, 'Not now, my little girl,' and then I sat here waiting to see what would happen, and Tom came home. But when I ran to tell him, he said, 'Go away, and don't bother,' and just took me by the shoulders and put me out. Oh, dear! everything is so queer and horrid, I don't know what to do."
Maud began to cry, and Polly sat down on the stairs beside her, trying to comfort her, while her own thoughts were full of a vague fear. All at once the dining-room door opened, and Tom's head appeared. A single glance showed Polly that something was the matter, for the care and elegance which usually marked his appearance were entirely wanting. His tie was under one ear, his hair in a toss, the cherished moustache had a neglected air, and his face an expression both excited, ashamed, and distressed; even his voice betrayed disturbance, for instead of the affable greeting he usually bestowed upon the young lady, he seemed to have fallen back into the bluff tone of his boyish days, and all he said was, "Hullo, Polly."
"How do you do?" answered Polly.
"I 'm in a devil of a mess, thank you; send that chicken up stairs, and come in and hear about it," he said, as if he had been longing to tell some one, and welcomed prudent Polly as a special providence.
"Go up, deary, and amuse yourself with this book, and these ginger snaps that I made for you, there 's a good child," whispered Polly, as Maud rubbed away her tears, and stared at Tom with round, inquisitive eyes.
"You 'll tell me all about it, by and by, won't you?" she whispered, preparing to obey.
"If I may," answered Polly.
Maud departed with unexpected docility, and Polly went into the dining-room, where Tom was wandering about in a restless way. If he had been "raging like a bear," Polly would n't have cared, she was so pleased that he wanted her, and so glad to be a confidante, as she used to be in the happy old days, that she would joyfully have faced a much more formidable person than reckless Tom.
"Now, then, what is it?" she said, coming straight to the point.
"Guess."
"You 've killed your horse racing."
"Worse than that."
"You are suspended again."
"Worse than that."
"Trix has run away with somebody," cried Polly, with a gasp.
"Worse still."
"Oh, Tom, you have n't horse whipped or shot any one?"
"Came pretty near blowing my own brains out but you see I did n't."
"I can't guess; tell me, quick."
"Well, I 'm expelled."
Tom paused on the rug as he gave the answer, and looked at Polly to see how she took it. To his surprise she seemed almost relieved, and after a minute silence, said, soberly, "That 's bad, very bad; but it might have been worse."
"It is worse;" and Tom walked away again with a despairing sort of groan.
"Don't knock the chairs about, but come and sit down, and tell me quietly."
"Can't do it."
"Well, go on, then. Are you truly expelled? Can't it be made up? What did you do?"
"It 's a true bill this time. I just had a row with the Chapel watchman, and knocked him down. If it was a first offence, I might have got off; but you see I 've had no end of narrow escapes, and this was my last chance; I 've lost it, and now there 'll be the dickens to pay. I knew it was all up with me, so I did n't wait to be turned out, but just took myself off."
"What will your father say?"
"It will come hard on the governor, but the worst of it is" there Tom stopped, and stood a minute in the middle of
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