Amber by Heather Burnside (fb2 epub reader .txt) 📕

night out wasn’t a success. Loretta had felt ill at ease in the pubs that Debbie took her to. They were full of dubious characters and, at first, she found she couldn’t settle, expecting trouble at any minute. It was only when she had drunk a great deal that she finally relaxed.

Despite the experience, Loretta wanted to go out with Debbie again; she’d just make sure that they avoided the haunts Debbie had taken her to last time. As she sat there, guzzling wine, she reflected on their last conversation.

‘Do you fancy another night out?’ asked Debbie. ‘I’m hoping that guy called Andy will be in the pub again. He was gorgeous and I wouldn’t mind hooking up with him.’

Loretta recalled the man and how loud and foul-mouthed he had been, and she suppressed a shudder. ‘I wouldn’t trust him if I were you. According to his friend he’s already seeing someone and they’re quite serious.’ She noticed Debbie’s glum expression and quickly added, ‘Actually, I was thinking, Debbie, I know somewhere I could take you where there are loads of lovely men, and they’ve all got plenty of money too.’

‘Oh yeah, where’s that?’

‘It’s near to where I used to live.’

‘What, in bloody Cheadle? That’ll cost us a fortune.’

‘Not necessarily. We can have a few drinks before we go out, use public transport to get there and then hopefully find some nice men who will buy a few rounds for us.’

‘Ooh, you’re not daft, are yer?’ said Debbie. ‘Count me in.’

Loretta smiled to herself as she thought about their forthcoming night out. Not only would it give her a break from her daily routine, but it would also serve another purpose. When she’d mentioned the rich men, it wasn’t just because she wanted to tempt Debbie, it was because she wanted that for herself too. Loretta was still relatively young and with her shiny blonde hair and slim figure she knew men found her attractive.

After two years living here, Loretta had had moments when she began to despair of ever escaping. But then she thought about her former friend Yvette’s words two years ago, “You’ll meet a nice man one day from the same background as you and remarry. Then you’ll be able to get out of this place.”

The more Loretta thought about it, the more it made sense. After all, she couldn’t think of a better way. She didn’t have any skills with which she could get a job and she wouldn’t have wanted to leave her children while she went out to work anyway. Meeting a rich man was the only way she would be able to raise her children to a better way of life.

And now, Loretta was going to make it her mission.

8

September 1995

Loretta was at Longsight Market with Debbie. It had been a trek getting there as they’d had to get two buses, but Debbie had raved about it for so long that she’d finally given in to her. Besides, Loretta and the children needed some new clothes and she could no longer afford to shop at the upmarket stores and boutiques where she used to shop.

‘I can’t spend too much on myself,’ she said as soon as they got off the bus. ‘The kids need new pyjamas and underwear.’

‘What’s wrong with the ones they’ve got?’

‘Well, some of their pyjamas are ripped, their socks have got holes in them and a lot of their underwear got dyed in the wash.’

‘Oh, you mean when they go a bit grey?’

‘Yeah, that’s right.’

‘Well, it’s no biggie,’ said Debbie. ‘It’s not like your kids are old enough to worry about what colour their underwear is. And who else sees it anyway?’

‘Yeah but, what about the other stuff with holes in it?’

Debbie tutted. ‘Have you never heard of a needle and thread? Bloody sew them. For fuck’s sake, Loz, you don’t have to rush out buying them new gear every time they get a little rip in summat. D’you really think your kids will notice the difference?’

Loretta shrugged.

‘There you go then. Save your fuckin’ money. You’ll have more to spend on yourself, and you do want some new gear, don’t you?’

‘Yeah, but…’

‘But, nowt. Haven’t you sewn anything before?’

‘Not recently, no.’

‘OK, well if you want a needle, I’ve got plenty. I can lend you some cotton too. Right, now let’s have a look what they’ve got here,’ said Debbie, approaching a stall with women’s garments hung on display.

Loretta went over to the stall with Debbie and, following Debbie’s lead, she started rummaging along the rails while the stallholder hovered in the background. She pulled out a nice top and held it against her but as she touched it, she noticed that it was damp from when it had rained earlier.

‘Actually, I think I’ll give it a miss,’ she said, walking away.

Debbie put down a dress she had been admiring then rushed to catch up with her. ‘What the bloody hell’s wrong? I thought you liked that top.’

‘I did but it was wet.’

‘So?’

‘Well, it’ll probably smell of damp.’

‘Will it, buggery. Just sling it in the wash when you get home. It’ll be fine. Right, watch this.’

Debbie went back to the stall leaving Loretta no choice but to join her as she wasn’t familiar enough with the area to wander round on her own. She watched as Debbie picked up the same dress she had been admiring earlier then spoke to the stallholder.

‘Can I try this on?’

The stallholder nodded to a makeshift changing room at the back of the stall, which was really no more than a curtain used to partition off a small area.

‘You stand guard,’ said Debbie.

Loretta did as she asked but she didn’t like the fact that she could see Debbie in her underwear through a gap in the sides of the curtain. She had no doubt that if she could see her then so could the stallholder who was hovering even closer and leering at her.

After a few minutes of fumbling around in the tiny curtained-off area,