Pieces of Me by Pua Ramona (small books to read txt) 📕

she wanted me to hear them? Did she really just fucking say that she wished it was Marino instead and not me that night at the fucking gas station? My heart feels like she literally just ripped that shit right out of my chest.

Reese hands me a beer and says “Here, before your head starts fucking with you let’s go out back and sit for a bit. Let the girls catch up ‘cause I’m sure Sina has a lot to get off her chest, and your crazy ass needs to get some air.” I take the beer from him and drink most of it down in one. “Slow down man, I don’t need you to get yourself all worked up for no damn reason. So grab your ass another beer then let’s go out back” Reese warns me.

I grab another beer then look over my shoulder and see that she’s watching me with no emotion on her face. I feel my heart ache a little but I make sure she doesn't see my feelings. I walk out to the back patio and take the seat on the opposite side of Reese. I want to face the water. Oh, did I mention that my backyard is connected to the lake? I fell in love with this place because it’s away from everything and I bought the house the very next day after viewing it. I love it because it was in a quiet area, but now my thoughts right now are of me getting married and raising my kids here. But, I don’t want any of that if it’s not going to be with Sina. When I said she was it for me, I meant it. Hearing her tell Lei that she wished things were different between us hurt, but what killed me was hearing her tell Lei that she wasn’t sure about us anymore.

“Talk to me man,” Reese says.

I sit there for a few minutes and offer up, “I fucked up huh?”

“Define fucked up?” Reese questions. I take another sip of my beer and look over at him. “I think I missed my chance with her. I fucked up.” Reese doesn’t say anything so I keep talking. “I don’t think I can be without her man, not after everything we’ve been through. She’s the mother of my son Reese, I can’t lose her now.”

Reese takes a sip of his beer then looks at me and says “Is it because you don’t want to be by yourself and Becca doesn’t want you anymore. So you want Sina to fill in that empty void?”

I look at him and say “Are you serious right now? Did you really just ask me that shit?” Reese gives me a smug look and I want to punch him in the damn mouth.

“All I’m saying is that if you don’t want to lose her then you’re going to have to fight harder for her. In other words, be her fucking friend. And that means you can’t fuck her every time your dick gets hard. You have to make her your first priority and I know it’s hard for you, but your dick stays in your pants” he says. “Do you love her? Or are you in love with her?”

“I’m in love with her. When I’m not with her I have to fight for air. The thought of her with another man makes me see red, the thought of her carrying another man’s child hurts my soul. If I lose her now man, then I feel like I don’t have a fucking reason to do better. I know I sound fucking stupid but it’s how I feel.” I confess.

“Then what are you going to do about it?”Reese pushes.

“I’m going to forget what I heard tonight and show her that I can be her friend, and if she decides that she wants me to be more than just that, I’ll do better for her. I’ll love her through it all. It’ll break my heart if that’s all we’ll ever be, just friends, but I need her in my life man.” I sigh.

Reese rolls his eyes and says “Alright, alright. Quit your fucking crying I believe you.”

“What does that even mean?” I ask.

He chuckles and says “I’ve never heard you cry over a girl before, not even over Chrissy, or Becca. So I believe you. I’ll help you get Sina back if you promise not to treat her like shit anymore, and I mean it.”

My chest feels a little lighter but not too much. “I swear on everything I love that I won’t hurt her again.”

He drinks the rest of his beer then says “All this shit talking you do about her and she’s got you wrapped around her little pretty finger. Or should I say she has you pussy whipped.”

What an asshole.

“Fuck you, man.”

He starts laughing and says “You should’ve seen your face when she said she wanted Marino over you. You looked like you were about to shit a fucking brick then cry like a little fucking bitch.”

I throw the rest of my beer in the trash can. “Can you see yourself without Lei?” I ask.

Reese’s shoulders fall just a little then he says, “Without her half of me wouldn’t be this alive.”

“If I lose Sina now, breathing would be pointless” I tell him.

He looks at me and says “I get it E, just promise me that you’re done fucking with her heart.”

I look past his shoulder and see Sina in the kitchen leaning against the counter crying. My heart aches. She wipes her face with a piece of paper towel and I know she can feel me watching because she turns to look out of the window straight back at me. She gives me a sad smile and walks out of the kitchen with a glass of water. I look back at Reese and vow, “You have my word; I will make it right.”

He drinks the rest of his beer and says “Take all the time