The End is Where We Begin by Maria Goodin (open ebook .txt) 📕

I reach out and gently tuck a stray piece of hair behind her ear. I hold her face between my palms, her scar against mine.

And for the third time in our lives we share our first kiss.

Chapter 28

Goodnight

From the top of the hill, you could see out over the park, above the kids’ playground and right across town. We sat on the grass gazing out at the lights of Timpton’s houses, pubs and restaurants shining brightly in the darkness.

“I think that’s Orion,” I said, pointing up at the sky. “Or maybe not. I dunno. Apparently, it’s easier to see in winter. Or where there’s less light pollution.”

The others looked up.

“Where d’you learn that?” asked Max.

I shrugged and smiled to myself. “Libby taught me.”

“Libby seems to be teaching you a lot of things,” piped up Tom, “apart from what to do with your—”

“Shut up, Tom,” I interrupted bluntly.

“Yeah, shut up, Tom,” agreed Michael.

“What?” asked Tom, in mock innocence. “I’m just saying—”

“Well, don’t,” Max told him abruptly.

Tom sighed. “Anyway, talking of girls—”

“Which we weren’t,” said Max.

“—talking of girls, we need to decide who to invite to Max’s party next month.”

“I’m not having a party.”

“’Course you are,” Tom corrected him, “it’s your sixteenth. You’ve gotta have a party. Parties are a great opportunity for getting it on with birds.”

Max clucked like a chicken. Tom ignored him.

“Seriously, there are some fit birds at school who are just waiting for an opportunity to get me alone and—”

“Turn you down?” teased Max.

“Punch you in the face?” suggested Michael.

“Kick you in the balls?” I offered.

“Anyway, who exactly are all these girls who are queuing up for a piece of you?” Max enquired. “Jessica Miller, who called you a knobhead in science last week? Lucy Walker, who told you she wouldn’t go out with you if you were the last male on earth?”

Michael and I sniggered.

“No,” tutted Tom, “just… other girls. Anyway,” he said, looking towards Michael and myself, “you two divs must have some fit girls at your school you could invite. Rich girls really know how to look after themselves. And they act all innocent, but I’ll tell you what they really want—”

“For you to stay as far away from them as possible?” I suggested.

“Exactly the opposite, my friend. Posh girls like a bit of rough,” said Tom.

“Not that rough,” I told him.

“Yeah, not Allenbrook rough,” added Max.

“Plus, you do remember we’re at an all boys’ school, don’t you?” asked Michael. “Funnily enough that means there aren’t that many girls.”

“But you said there are girls in the sixth form. So invite some of them.”

“Why would sixth-form girls from a private school want to come to the sixteenth birthday party of some comp boy they’ve never met?” scoffed Max.

“Because I’ll be there!” Tom replied.

“That’s definitely not a bonus feature,” I told him.

“What about that girl you mentioned the other day?” Tom asked me. “Helen someone.”

“Who? Oh, Hellie… God, no. We’ve only spoken to her, like, two or three times—”

“I don’t think Hellie Larsen’s going to come to a party with us,” Michael smiled at me. “I think girls like her have much better things to do.”

I nodded.

“Is she fit?” asked Tom. “That’s all that really matters here.”

“I’m not even sure why she talks to us,” said Michael. “She probably wouldn’t give either of us the time of day outside of school.”

“God, you two are useless,” Tom moaned, “what’s the point of you being at a posh school if you can’t provide the posh totty.”

“Right, I can’t wait any longer, I need a piss,” said Max standing up. “Anyone coming?”

“Coming for a piss with you?” asked Michael, sounding disgusted.

“Why would we want to do that?” I frowned.

Max pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose and peered into the darkness.

“Are you scared of going for a piss on your own?” laughed Tom.

“Oh, come on, it’s pitch black,” Max complained.

“You’re joking,” I groaned.

“What do you think is possibly going to happen to you in the park?” asked Tom. “This is Timpton, not some gangland in South London. I don’t think people are just lurking in the darkness waiting to jump you.”

“My eyesight’s bad in the dark, I can’t see a friggin’ thing!”

“Oh, come on, you big wuss,” groaned Tom, standing up, “although if you’re gonna whip your dick out, I pray I can’t see a friggin’ thing.”

Once they’d disappeared into the darkness, Michael sighed.

“God, Tom can be irritating at times.”

“Yep,” I agreed. “It’s all just talk though. Especially all the chat about girls. It’s a load of crap. And that stuff about losing his virginity on a camping holiday in Cornwall is bollocks.”

“And he needs to lay off with his comments about you and Libby. It’s none of his business.”

“I’d never tell him anyway. I mean, when me and her do… you know… I’m not gonna just spout off about it. I mean, I’d tell you, but that’s it.”

“Me?”

“Yeah. ’Cause I think I’d wanna tell someone, and you… well, you’re different. I can trust you. I know you won’t be a dick about it.”

We fell silent for a moment, gazing out at the lit-up town.

“So what about you?” I asked. “Are there any girls you fancy? I mean, I know we’re not exactly spoiled for choice at St John’s, but what kind of girl would you go for?”

Michael looked up at the sky, chewing his lower lip.

“Can I…?” he started and then hesitated. “If I told you something, would you promise to keep it quiet?”

I shrugged. “Yeah, ’course.”

He took a deep breath. “It’s just… I think maybe… that maybe I’m…”

“He pissed on my shoes! He actually pissed on my fucking shoes!”

Tom emerged, fuming, from the darkness. Max, doubled-up with laughter, was following behind him.

“I wasn’t even that near him and he just swung round and aimed the bloody thing right at me! My new trainers! I’m never wearing these again!”

Max clutched his belly and staggered towards us, laughing uproariously. He flopped down next to Michael.

“I didn’t… I didn’t mean to!” he gasped,