Apocalypse: Fairy System by Macronomicon (fox in socks read aloud txt) 📕

“I get it,” Jeb muttered, rubbing his chin.

“Seraine Grenore… Is she related to Garland Grenore?”

“That’s his daughter,” Bree said from her desk.

“The man owns half the town,” her keegan coworker said, slapping the bounty. “He can afford to pay more than five bulbs for his own daughter.”

Jeb eyed the bounty for a while, pondering.

The guy was a dick, but his daughter had done right by him. More than right, even. Maybe she hadn’t been able to stand up to her father in the moment, but it was damned kind of her to give Jeb that coin and open Zlesk to the idea that Jeb might be innocent.

I wonder if I’d still be sitting in the cell if she hadn’t showed up.

“…Can I take that bounty?” Jeb asked.

“Do you wanna die?”

“Most days, no.”

Bree sighed and leaned on the desk, giving him a morose look. “We can’t stop you from trying, but keep in mind that there’s a very real chance you’d get the girl hurt too if you rush in there all willy-nilly. That’s on top of the fact that you’re more likely to get yourself killed than anything else.

“Not to mention, if the sand-pirates don’t kill you, but she gets hurt, you’ll probably disappear.”

“It’s just not worth your time. It’s not worth anybody’s time,” the keegan woman said, waving her hand dismissively.

“I’ve got a good feeling about this one,” Jeb said, snatching one of the bounties before he marched out the door, chest puffed out.

“Wai—oh, there he goes.”

Jeb clomped out onto the street, his mind whirling as he tried to concoct a cohesive plan. He needed more information. He needed— “Ah, crap.”

Jeb turned on his heel and went back into the office. “Do you happen to have the individual bounties on Svek Pederson and his crew?” Jeb asked, smiling sheepishly.

Bree rolled her eyes and started separating out no less than eight bounties and handing the small stack to Jeb.

“Those are Svek’s crew with their own bounties.”

“Thank you, ma’am.”

Now I just need to find someone to translate these who isn’t liable to sell me out…. Zlesk comes to mind. If Jeb asked a local to translate for him, he’d be more likely to wind up shot in the head a day’s journey from town, so despite being a less than ideal choice, Zlesk was at least proven to have law and order in mind.

Even if he is an ass.

“Maybe I can catch Zlesk in the office,” Jeb said, glancing at the waning sun. It had taken all day to forge the recommendation, after all. If he got back to the jail when Zlesk was wrapping up his day, he’d be pushing papers at his desk.

“Smartass.”

“Yep?” the fairy asked from where she was gnawing on a pixie stick. It was a small part of this month’s pound of sugar.

“Can you spy on Garland Grenore for me?”

“Why?”

“I want you to get some intel. I wanna know why he’s nine thousand bulbs in debt, and hopefully you can find something sentimental to him. Something that could get me Myst?”

“Besides his money?”

Jeb chuckled. “Pretty much.”

“I charge my standard spying rate,” Smartass said.

“Which is?”

“Standard rate. Just agree to it.”

“Nope. How about five percent of whatever I get from Garland?”

“Hmmm….” The fairy gave him an intense glare. “That could be nothing.”

“It could be a lot if you get me good intel,” Jeb said.

“Five percent of whatever payment you receive from Garland Grenore in exchange for the rescue of his daughter, and whatever bounties you claim in the process. This includes whatever you claim in penalty should he renege.”

“I can do that?”

“Did I not mention that?” Smartass asked.

“Does it still give me Impact?” Jeb asked. “I can just…take something if they refuse to pay?”

“Of course. If you can take something.”

“Is that why fairies are always trying to take people’s firstborn?” Jeb asked. “So when they naturally renege, you can take whatever you want and get Impact that way?”

“You’re a quick study.”

“Hmm…” Jeb began sorting out his plan.

1.       Get info on pirates/Garland.

2.       Offer grandiose verbal agreement Garland is sure to renege on.

3.       Fulfill Jeb’s side of the bargain.

4.       Get double-crossed.

5.       Triple-cross in return.

Just the broad strokes so far, Jeb thought, twisting the thick ring on his finger. I wish I knew what the hell this thing did. He was going to need every advantage he could get.

“Alright. I will pay you five percent of whatever payment I receive from Garland Grenore in exchange for the rescue of his daughter, and five percent of whatever bounties I claim in the process, including whatever I might claim in penalty, in exchange for your assistance in the completion of the task, up to and including spying on our soon-to-be client.”

“Hmm…” Smartass squinted at him.

“You know you’d be tacitly obligated to help with a percentage anyway. This is just more explicit.”

“And binding. Add a clause that frees me of the arrangement should Garland Grenore refuse to agree to any deal whatsoever.”

“Done.”

Jeb recited the entire bargain, and the two of them shook on it before the palm-sized fairy zipped off into the sky, presumably heading for the home of one of the richest men in the city.

I really hope the guy doesn’t have fairy roach motels, Jeb thought idly as he headed to the jail.

Jeb managed to catch Zlesk just before the harried sheriff left his desk, slapping the papers down in front of him with a grin.

“Can you translate these?”

“No,” Zlesk said, putting on his overcoat before grabbing Jeb’s arm, hauling him bodily toward the exit. Jeb desperately tried not to fall over, hopping and clacking across the room as he was half-dragged