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not like

ibid, 24 July 1938

It was all to me

ibid, 21 August 1938

You arenโ€™t going

ibid

I shrink under

ibid, 3 September 1938

315

Lord what a jam

ibid, 30 August 1938

He is an hysteric

RH to ES, 13 September 1938 (Texas)

317

the pain of her

UVT Daybook, 15 November 1938 (Texas)

In the weeks

ibid, 23 December 1938

a brown saucer

ibid, 24 December 1938

35 The rain pours down, the icy wind howls

318

The fat

UVT Daybook, 11 January 1939 (Texas)

Una wonโ€™t

ibid, 21 January 1939

Johnnie would

ibid, 22 January 1939

319

You have held

RH to ES, 3 March 1939 (Texas)

Something very

ibid, 5 February 1939

unless you do

ibid, 9 February 1939

320

Jews, Yes

ibid, 22 March 1939

We are clear of

UVT Daybook, 2 July 1939 (Texas)

321

that slug of

UVT Daybook, March 1939 (Texas)

He told me

Sandra Tealdi to Evguenia Soulina, 27

May 1939 (Monica Still)

322

I refuse in

UVT Daybook, 16 May 1939 (Texas)

Whatโ€™s the good

RH to ES, 9 July 1939 (Texas)

The flat is in

ibid, 19 July 1939

Oh Piggie

ibid, 6 June 1939

323

I suspect

UVT Daybook, 24 July 1939 (Texas)

I knocked

ibid, 26 August 1939

325

But for Mr Eden

ibid, 11 September 1939

alias Florence

ibid, 20 September 1939

326

You fool

ibid, 7 October 1939

327

The rain pours

ibid, 30 October 1939

My suspicions

ibid, 17 October 1939

36 At the Wayside

328

horrible spectacle

UVT Daybook, 7 January 1940 (Texas)

I may despise

ibid, 5 February 1940

329

languidly served

ibid, 15 January 1940

Suppose you had

RH to ES, 28 April 1940 (Texas)

331

As Evguenia

UVT Daybook, 10 May 1940 (Texas)

The implication

ibid, 26 February 1941

331

As Evguenia The implication Are you a nurse

ibid, 22 September 1941

332

This woman has

ibid, 14 February 1941

So there goes

ibid, 19 April 1941

We demurred

ibid, 12 June 1941

333

After all,

ibid, June 1941

Henceforward

ibid, 22 June 1941

I advised John

ibid, 15 August 1941

334

I write daily

ibid, 29 August 1941

I am sorry Miss

ES, autobiographical notes (Texas)

335

I was happy

ibid, 24 September 1941

336

we Bolshevists

UVT Daybook, 27 October 1941

May I ask

ibid, 6 November 1941

Then follows

ibid, 17 November 1941

337

She sat there

ibid, 10 November 1941

I simply prayed

ibid, 1 December 1941

so as to avoid

ibid, 9 December 1941

37 Johnโ€™s Calvary

338

The bitch

UVT Daybook, 15 January 1942 (Texas)

339

I told her

ibid, 29 January 1942

She is terribly

UVT to ES, 5 February 1942 (Texas)

These are grim

RH to ES, 6 February 1942.

340

Donโ€™t you remember

ibid, 30 March 1942

Oh how weary

ibid, 21 February 1942

the dreadful creature

UVT Daybook, 6 April 1942 (Texas)

I think it only right

UVT to ES, 6 April 1942 (Texas)

342

And all because

UVT Daybook, 12 August 1942 (Texas)

I have had very many

RH to ES, 24 December 1942

343

There a veritable

UVT Daybook, 25 February 1943

The memory of

ibid

344

I sealed my mouth

ES, autobiographical notes (Monica Still)

345

When you began

UVT Daybook, 30 December 1945

346

I saw your eyes

ibid, 25 December 1943

347

My John is dying

ibid, 29 September 1943

You must be friends

ES to UVT, 29 July 1950 (Monica Still)

Youโ€™ll be good

UVT Letters to John, 27 March 1944

348

There was never

UVT Daybook, 9 March 1943

She looked up

ibid, dated 21 June 1943, but written four months later

I said that she had

Naomi Jacob, Me and the Swans (Kimber 1963)

Ivory clear and pale

UVT Daybook, 7 October 1943

349

resting together

ibid

MY JOHN, MY JOHNNIE

38 Mine for ever

353

would have the

UVT Letters to John, May 1944

strength

I feel I must

ibid, 27 January 1944

354

Such a decision

The Life and Death of RH

There is nothing

UVT Letters to John, 18 January 1949

My diary shows

2 January 1944

355

You are with Him

ibid, 6 February 1944

It wonโ€™t matter

ibid, 23 June 1944

Cards on the

ibid, 27 February 1944

356

after all my precious

ibid, 6 February 1944

Itโ€™s all horrible

ibid, 28 March 1944

grave provocation

UVT, statement to the executors of her will, 23 September 1944

357

Your letter

Harold Rubinstein to Horatio Lovat

Dickson, 14 February 1975

I would only be

UVT Letters to John, 3 November 1944

358

I wear your poplin

ibid, 12 January 1944

nothing ever for a

ibid, December 1944

359

nothing can hurt

ibid

She showed me

Maria Visetti to Jane Caruth, 13 October 1943

all these years

ibid

360

If I comply

ibid, 11 February 1944

361

Truly your mantle

UVT Letters to John, 6 March 1945

darling little

ibid, 1 February 1944

will never in this

ibid, 23 June 1945

362

I think such solemn

ibid

The answer of course

ibid, 22 February 1945

363

I certainly donโ€™t

ibid, 21 March 1945

I have done for

ibid, 14 April 1945

on a larger scale

ibid, June 1944

364

I will not have

ibid, October 1944

That is a result

ibid, August 1945

I hung on to

ibid, 14 September 1945

365

It was all settled

UVT Letters to John, 5 July 1946

This marriage

ibid, 14 August 1946

39 He is my occupation

366

I canโ€™t remember

UVT Letters to John, April 1945

367

a ghastly wreck

ibid, 26 January 1944

I will not let her

ibid, 27 January 1944

They want me

ibid, 25 January 1944

368

I am not really

Peter Davies to Sir Oscar Dowson, 15 June 1946 (PRO)

the impression that

memorandum from Chuter Ede to F. H. Logan, 19 June 1946 (PRO)

From the Home Office

memorandum from F. H. Logan to Chuter Ede, 22 June 1946 (PRO)

369

in case the priestโ€™s

UVT Letters to John, December 1946

If only she didnโ€™t

ibid, 25 June 1948

I simply canโ€™t

ibid, 5 May 1948

I am not rising

ibid, 31 August 1948

371

I am deeply

ibid, 14 May 1948

I beg of you

ES to UVT, 12 April 1950

She canโ€™t be

UVT Letters to John, 15 April 1950

372

My dear Evguenia

UVT to ES, 4 August 1950

374

When we were alone

UVT Letters to John, February 1957

He looks so beautiful

ibid, 29 January 1956

375

Nika asked me

ibid, February 1956

There is the usual

ibid, 11 October 1956

Her decision that

ibid

376

After all, the money

ibid, 3 February 1957

I am willing

ibid, 6 September 1957

377

I think that being

RH to ES, 7 September 1934

My poor sweet

UVT Letters to John, 6 October 1957

378

It would not even be

UVT Daybook, February 1944

INDEX

NOTE: Writings by Radclyffe Hall appear directly under title; works by others appear under authorโ€™s name

Acosta, Mercedes de, 147, 159

Adamโ€™s Breed (RH; earlier Food; novel), 138โ€“47, 159, 167, 171, 197

Adcock, Sir John, 135

Agate, James, 195

Albania, 320

Amherst, Jeffery, 240

Amyat, Katinka, 360, 363

Anderman, Dr, 327โ€“8, 330โ€“2, 344

Anderson, Sir John, 190

Anderson, Sherwood, 228

Annie (maid), 313, 324

Annunzio, Gabriele dโ€™, 122, 261, 266, 285, 316

Arbuthnot, Father, 253

Arlen, Michael, 135

Arrowsmith, J.W. (publisher), 126โ€“7, 134

Asbury, Herbert, 228

Attkins, Susan, 33, 43, 48

Atwood, Tony (Claire), 241, 254, 305, 363

Bagnoles de lโ€™Orne, 258, 261

Baird-Douglas, Lillian, 320

Baker, Mrs (Evgueniaโ€™s

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