Irresistible Bachelors: Books 1-5 by Landish, Lauren (bts books to read TXT) 📕

can drop his ass to the floor like you’ve never seen, then work it back up nice and slowly until you’re throbbing in your pants.”

Matt laughs nervously. “Hey, what are you trying to say?”

Before I can reply, Byron Smith, one of the top level executives, walks over. His tie is loose around his neck, and his combed-over greying hair gives him sort of a cloudy appearance. He’s tall, and despite his skinny neck, he’s got a big potbelly that’s almost cartoonish over his chicken legs. I have no idea why he hangs around Matt. There’s a huge gap in age, and Byron’s duties have nothing to do with me or Matt. But when the two get together, it’s like two grade schoolers. I swear they’ve swapped fart jokes sometime over the past year.

“Hey, Matt,” Byron says, grinning foolishly. “Have you heard about the new computer password system?”

“No, what about it?” Matt asks, and I roll my eyes. I’ve heard this one before.

“Well, we have to put in new passwords,” Byron says. “Tom down the hall went in and decided that his new password would be Tomspenis. He puts it in, and you won’t believe what the computer told him.”

“What?” Matt asks, grinning.

“It said Try again. Tomspenis is not long enough.”

I try not to roll my eyes or to turn it around on them. Instead, I just gather up my stuff. “That’s my cue to get back to work,” I say. “Talk to you later.”

I leave the two to continue their weird bromance. Their relationship just confounds me.

I walk through the maze and around the corner to my cubicle, glad to have my own little space that I’ve personalized a little. My heels are muted against the tough industrial-grade carpet, and more than once, I’ve considered ditching them for flats, except that the company does have visitors who expect them. I open my computer and login to my desktop, getting ready for the day. Franklin Consolidated was one of the first companies to build this city, and despite being bought in a corporate takeover, it still has prestige. We’re in some of the top floors of our high-rise, and the view out the windows in the break room are breathtaking. Overall, despite it being corporate drudgery, I could be doing a lot worse. Besides dealing with Matt’s bullshit, this place isn’t that bad.

I’m not gonna let that dickhead get me down. I figure I’ll get another promotion soon and move out of this cube-farm and into the outer ring offices, and then I won’t have to deal with him. Really, I’m just nervous about this new Regional President. It’s been hush-hush about who he is, the corporation that bought Franklin Consolidated keeping things quiet. It’s like they want it to be some sort of national security top secret or something. That, combined with knowing I still have Jake’s wallet, is making me a big ball of butterflies.

There’s a commotion going around the room, and as my email loads, I see why. The new boss is going to be in soon and everybody is excited. Or maybe nervous is probably the better word.

“Hey, Roxy, you excited?” Hannah asks. She’s dressed to kill today, with a knee-length pencil skirt that shows off her toned legs and a blouse that is just a little tighter than normal. I guess she’s playing it up some, but she’s certainly got the right to.

“I think I’m holding up well,” I say, flashing an anxious smile. “Just hoping he’s not a huge pain in the ass,” I whisper.

Hannah shakes her head. “I’d be nervous too if I were tabbed to be his assistant. Well, that and worried that the cops could kick down the door any minute. Say, how do you think you’d look in an orange jumpsuit? I hear orange is the new black.”

I hold my scowl for all of two seconds before I can’t help but laugh. “I can’t be pissed with you,” I say, leaning back. Her jokes actually make me feel less anxious. I’d do the same if she were in my position. “By the way, if I’m going to jail, you’re going to jail too as an accomplice. Preferably to be cellies with some six-foot-tall girl named Missy who’s hungry for blondes.”

Hannah laughs. “Come on, that’s why we’re friends. We’re each other’s spirit animal. And I know if I get Missy as my cellie, you and I can alternate days on being her bitch.”

“We are, I agree. Except you’re more of a beast than an animal, and I’m not muff diving for you no matter who it is.”

Hannah laughs. “Glad to see you back to normal.”

“I have Jake’s wallet,” I say after a moment, sobering again. “It’s here in my purse.”

“I’ll go with you after work and we can turn it in at the club,” Hannah says. “I’ll be your backup just in case.”

“Thank you.”

Right then, we hear talking, so Hannah and I stand up to see Tom Powers, the CEO of Franklin Consolidated, at the head of the room. He’s a tall, distinguished man with white hair, dressed as always in his dark double-breasted suit. He’s totally old school, but in a grandfatherly sort of way. I heard that he’s taking retirement with the corporate takeover, and if so, I’m going to miss him around.

“Hello, everyone, if I can have your attention, please?” he says. “Come on up if you’d like, or if you can see just fine, your cubicles are okay. Anyway, I’d like to take a few minutes to thank you all. I know that the rumor mill has been running overtime for the past few months, and . . .”

I tune Tom out a little, thinking about the day. After this, I need to finish checking my emails, then there’s the report from the agribusiness division that I’ll need to get together for my new boss . . . I wonder if he’s nice? I wonder if he’s a he, or maybe a she?

I know who I’d like to