Myth 18 - MythChief by Asprin, Robert (good non fiction books to read .TXT) 📕

“Conference, guys!” Tananda announced, taking both huge males by the arms and dragging them into a corner. “Marmilda and Marmel, could we have privacy for a while, please?”

“Certainly,” Marmilda said, taking Marmel by the arm. “Come downstairs. You can help me wash dishes. Let the people do their job. Call us if you need anything.” The two Imps retreated from the room.

My former associates huddled. Tananda spoke in a low voice, eliciting muffled exclamations from Chumley and Guido. I couldn't tell if they were upset or not. I waited nervously. What if they didn't want me in on this project? What would I do? I had a client, too. Then they broke into laughter.

Guido turned to me. “You got the jump on Tanda?” he said, slapping me heartily on the back. I slipped on a pile of multicolored teddy bears and sat down on a heap of shoes. “Dat's more than I can say I ever got.”

“Dumb luck.” I said modestly, picking myself up. In-​side. I was slumping with relief. “No, it wasn't,” Tananda said, smiling at inc. “You've gotten a lot better at magik.” “So have you,” I insisted.

“Not me,'” Tananda said, with a chuckle. She held out her hand and displayed a gaudy knuckle-​duster with a huge green stone in the center. “I borrowed this ring from Massha. We knew we were going up against Narwickius. Couldn't take the chance that he had left one of his bully-​boys on the premises. You've improved a lot without hav-​ing to rely on gadgets.”

“Practice,” I said, modestly. “I'm doing what I can with what I've got.”

“Never denigrate yourself, tiger,” she said, leaning over and giving me a kiss on the cheek. “It would rake most people years to make the progress you have in months ”

“Awright, awright, awright,” Guido said, holding up his hands. "Enough with the mutual admiration society. Tananda said youse agreed to a temporary cooperative venture. We ain't got much time until

zero hour, so all in favor?“ Chumley put up his hand. ”Aye.“ Tananda followed suit. ”Aye."

“'Aye,” Guido added, making it three. “Okay, dat's unanimous. I mean, it's just a formality, Boss... I mean, Skeeve. We hadda decide in a democratic and fair fashion. That's the way we've been doin' things since you been gone.”

“Is everyone upset with me?” I asked. I knew I sounded plaintive, hut I couldn't help it.

“No! We thought you were upset with us.'” Tananda ad-​mitted. “You haven't come around once since the time you dropped in. You didn't invite any of us to see your new of-​fice.”

I hung my head. “It's not much. I thought you wouldn't really want to see it. I felt pretty awkward. I guess I didn't think about what would happen in the future if I came back.”

“Neither did we, what?” Chumley said.

“D'you mind?” Guido said, cutting short the conversa-​tion. “We can have a real powwow later. We got a high roller comin' around in about three hours. We gotta work out a plan to deal with him.”

“And find the will,” I said. “But that can wait until we get rid of the problem. What do you have on Narwickius?”

“Nasty,” Chumley said He plucked a pair of pince-​nez glasses from within a tuft of fur on his purple chest and placed them on his nose. He unfurled a scroll and spread it out for me to read. “Pray skip the police blotter. I assure you it is as complete as I could make it.”

I whistled as I skimmed down the long parchment, over Incidents Precipitated and Alleged Misdeeds. “I admire your research, Chumley,” I said, glancing up. “This guy has caused trouble in over forty dimensions.”

“Yeah, he's tough. It's a shame that he hadda pick on a coupla harmless Imps,” Guido said. “How many people does he have working for him?”

“I was able to discern the employment status of over 250 different mugs, thieves, grifters, shysters, penny-​ante crooks, leg breakers and other miscreants who have been used for jobs small and large,” Chumley said. “He has a permanent staff of eleven. Two are powerful mages, a Vipe and a Pervert.”

“You mean Pervect,” I said automatically. “I say, not this one,” Chumley corrected me. “Read sub-​section three, if you would be so good.”

I scanned the details in the paragraph, and I felt the blood leave my face. “Can you DO that with a camel?”

“I believe there were at least four witnesses,” Chumley said. “The survivors said that the deed was at Narwickius's personal behest.”

“Nasty indeed,” I concurred. “Well, what do we know we can use as leverage?” “Not a lot. Titans move fast, and they carry a lotta fire-​power,” Guido said. "Not to mention their natural

physical shape. You don't wanna get in a clinch with one."

“People who move too fast often make mistakes,” I said thoughtfully, scanning the document again. “Do you think we could bluff him?”

“I would greatly favor it to brute strength,” Chumley said. “He who throws the first punch has lost the war of wits, what? Yet I have heard that nothing deters him.”

“What he said,” opined Guido. “Not that we won't be ready for him. I gotta few things with me that could take out a charging whaleosaurus.” He patted his side pockets. The “things” must have been fairly flat, because nothing distended the perfect cut of his pin-​striped suit coat.

“We don't know how many of his hooligans he might have with him,” Chumley said. “His gang acts as backup, but all decisions I can