Lord of the Far Island by Victoria Holt (free e novels .TXT) 📕

"He always really liked you," I said to comfort her.

"He despises me," she retorted. "Of course I wasn't adventurous like you. You two went so well together. You liked the same things. It's right, I know, Ellen. You'll be ever so happy."

I kissed her. "You are a dear, Esmeralda. Are you sure you don't really love Philip?"

"Quite sure," she answered emphatically. "I was terrified that he would ask me to marry him and I'd have to say yes because that was what Mama wanted. And then it all turned out this way!"

"I don't think your mother is very pleased."

"Well, I am," she said. "Oh, Ellen, I was dreading it."

Cousin Agatha had got over the first shock and was swallowing her disappointment. I wondered whether she was consoling herself that even a Poor Relation's link was better than none.

"Of course," she said, "you will have to have some clothes. We can't have people saying that we kept you short."

I said: "Don't worry, Cousin Agatha. Philip is not concerned in the least with my clothes and perhaps when I'm married he'll buy some for me."

"You talk like an idiot. Don't you realize that from now on you are going to be the cynosure of all eyes? People are going to try to discover what he sees in you." Her nose twitched to imply she could clearly not provide the answer to this conundrum. "You will have to be suitably clad. There will be functions . . . dinner parties and then of course the bride dress."

"We don't want a lot of ceremony."

"You don't want it. You forget you will be marrying into the Carrington family." Again that twitch of the nose. "It's true, he is only a younger son. But, of course, a Carrington. When you are married you will be required to mix in certain circles. I doubt not you will wish Esmeralda, who has been your companion since childhood, to stay with you now and then."

I felt suddenly powerful. It was a marvelous feeling. I couldn't resist smiling benignly on Cousin Agatha and saying graciously that I hoped Esmeralda would be a frequent guest at my house.

I'm happy, I thought. I'm gloriously happy. Everything has changed. Talk about Cinderella! Fancy Philip's being my fairy godmother! I suppose this is being in love.

"I couldn't have people saying that we had not given you of the best," she went on. "This strange thing has happened and unless Philip changes his mind it seems that you will marry into the family. You will always remember of course your amazing good luck and whence it came. No doubt you will feel gratitude towards those who cared for you and but for whom you would never have been presented with this golden opportunity."

I let her talk on. Happiness had made me more generous, and it seemed a small compensation for her disappointment. Fortunately I was never of a vindictive nature and could quickly forget the slights and indignities of my childhood.

"I'm afraid Tilly will not be capable of coping with what we shall need. She could make a housedress or so perhaps. Lady Emily may wish you to go to her couturiere. You will need a very elegant going-away dress and of course there is the wedding dress. I was speaking to your cousin Mr. Loring about it only a short while ago. He is willing to foot the bills so that you may step into your new life with grace. After all, as I said to him, it will reflect on us, and we have Esmeralda's future to think of."

I was scarcely listening. So many exciting things were happening.

Philip was always calling at the house. We rode together in the Row. I had a new riding habit—a present from Mr. Loring, prodded no doubt by Cousin Agatha because riding in the Row made one very prominent. We were constantly being photographed.

"What a bore," said Philip. "Who wants all this? I just want us to get away together."

He was very happy and it was wonderful to know that he was so much in love with me. He teased me and bantered with me just as he always had; and we were constantly engaged, it seemed, in our verbal battle, which was a delight to us both. I was nineteen, he was nearly twenty-one, and life seemed good to us. I don't think he knew very much more of the world than I did, which was precious little. Sometimes, though, it is better to know little of what the future has in store.

It was pleasant to be welcomed by his family. Lady Emily's vagueness was rather charming and she confided in me once that she was looking forward to the little babies we would have. She liked to talk a great deal in a rambling fashion. There had always been boys in the Carrington family, she told me. She had had Rollo a year after her marriage and then there was a long gap before Philip arrived. Two very different boys they were. "Rollo used to frighten me sometimes, my dear. He was so clever. Philip was not like that."

It was a Carrington tradition to have boys, and in view of Rollo's misfortune in marriage Philip and I were to be the ones to produce the all-important male Carringtons. There was a certain implication that Philip and I should not delay too long before producing the first grandson.

The thought of having a baby thrilled me and there was not a cloud in my sky during those first weeks after the dance. I think I really believed it would go on like that forever.

We went down to the country for a week as the Carringtons wanted to celebrate our engagement among their friends there. I had always been attracted by the house from the first moment I had seen it, but now that I was to be a member of the family and it would occasionally