I Still Hate You by Marie Skye (top 100 novels .txt) 📕

He stood up, buttoning up his suit jacket. “Regardless of what you decide, you’re welcomed in our family. You are family, and I’ll make sure everyone knows it. Your choice will never be used against you.” He started for the door but then stopped, pulling a folded piece of paper from his inner jacket pocket. “Walt found this in your room, it was left behind.” He placed it on the counter before giving me a nod and then leaving.

22

Perrie

I didn’t move. I didn’t speak. I just sat there existing. Hours went by and the next thing I knew when I finally turned my head to look at the stove clock, it was almost ten p.m. I finally dared a glance at my phone, seeing the multiple calls and texts from Ash, and also Claire. I didn’t bother with any of that. All I thought about was what Gerald said and also what Gerald left.

Finally getting up, I walked to the counter where Gerald left the folded piece of paper. I knew exactly what it was without even opening it. I traced the edges of the folded lined yellow paper, before gently unfolding it and looking at the words I wrote so long ago to someone that no longer existed.

You left the world today.

I’m trying so hard to understand why. You always said you could do whatever you wanted and laughed and joked. I laughed it off when you said ‘you could leave anytime because you ran your own life.’

You left the world today

You took your own words to heart. You left because you wanted to. Did you think of me? Did you think of what this would do to me? Did you think of me at all?

You left the world today

You were all I had. You were all I fought for. Everything I did was for you.

To make you proud. And why? Because I looked up to you.

You left the world today

And I’m still here.

23

Perrie

“You look thoroughly satisfied.” I raised my head at the smirk Ash was giving me.

I sighed, reaching for my phone to check the time. “Well, you lasted way longer than three minutes, so yes, I would definitely agree on the satisfaction part.” The boyish grin he gave me said it all. The smile slowly faded as he looked me over.

“What do you think about when you look at me like that?” I whispered. He slowly made eye contact with me. After a minute he slowly shook his head. “Anyway, shouldn’t you be asking me some questions or something? You know because of the whole client thing.”

He sat up, sighing. “Do you want me to ask you questions?”

“Don’t you with your other clients?”

“That’s different.” He looked at me thoughtfully for a moment. “Okay, get up, wear something... small. You have one hour.”

I scrambled to my room to get ready. I was oddly excited. I didn’t know if it was a date or what but it didn’t matter. I trusted him, and yet I was a little off guard when he took me to a club. That was when I realized I was overdressed in the simple sundress I was wearing. That is if you compare me to the woman at the next table completely nude if you don’t count the pasties on her breasts, and that’s all.

I leaned toward Ash, as he waved to someone he knew. “Where the hell are we?”

He pulled me closer. “Chicago’s biggest secret. One of them at least.”

A woman came over and placed two glasses down—a small glass bowl of sugar cubes, and a bottle filled with green liquid. Ash went to work placing a cube in each glass before pouring the liquid over it and then handing it to me.

“So, what’s this lesson all about?”

“Confidence.” I looked at the girl dancing across the room. The guy she was with had his hands up her skirt. She surely had a lot of confidence. As the club filled, more people came over to Ash and I just watched. They knew him. They liked him. They respected him. He was king everywhere he went.

We danced, we drank, we laughed. This was a new side of Ash I hadn’t quite seen before. We had just sat back down, and someone came over to whisper something in his ear. He slightly tensed. “I’ll be back,” he said, not even bothering to wait for my response. It was fine with me, I was tired.

Suddenly, the stage I didn’t even know was there lit up. It took a moment before I realized they were about to do some sort of a skit. Kind of weird for a club but whatever. I watched as one of the characters danced with a woman in a historical garment and of course, they spoke French. I was following along, then jumped when Ash appeared beside me and pulled me into his lap.

“Relax,” he whispered in my ear, and I took several deep breaths before finally leaning against him. The scene playing out in front of us was erotic. I closed my eyes as his hands went from kneading my shoulders to traveling down my arms until he reached my hands, placing his over mine. Together our hands moved up and down my sides before finally cupping my breasts. I swear, if being a sex therapist doesn’t pan out for him, he definitely should be a masseuse. The moment his thumbs brushed against my nipples, I gasped, which quickly turned into a moan.

“Spread your legs,” I heard him whisper, at least I thought I did, but surely, he wouldn’t say something like that—and definitely not here, in public. I also had to remind myself this was Ash who made me get myself off in a public bathroom. “Spread your legs,” he said again. My eyes snapped open, ready to end this little game but one of his arms went around my waist holding me still. I looked