David Copperfield by Charles Dickens (good novels to read in english .TXT) 📕

“No, Copperfield!⁠—No communication⁠—a⁠—until⁠—Miss Wickfield⁠—a⁠—redress from wrongs inflicted by consummate scoundrel⁠—Heep!” (I am quite convinced he could not have uttered three words, but for the amazing energy with which this word inspired him when he felt it coming.) “Inviolable secret⁠—a⁠—from the whole world⁠—a⁠—no exceptions⁠—this day week⁠—a⁠—at breakfast-time⁠—a⁠—everybody present⁠—including aunt⁠—a⁠—and extremely friendly gentleman⁠—to be at the hotel at Canterbury⁠—a⁠—where⁠—Mrs. Micawber and myself⁠—Auld Lang Syne in chorus⁠—and⁠—a⁠—will expose intolerable ruffian⁠—Heep! No more to say⁠—a⁠—or listen to persuasion⁠—go immediately⁠—not capable⁠—a⁠—bear society⁠—upon the track of devoted and doomed traitor⁠—Heep!”

With this last repetition of the magic word that had kept him going at all, and in which he surpassed all his previous efforts, Mr. Micawber rushed out of the house; leaving us in a state of excitement, hope, and wonder, that reduced us to a condition little better than his own. But even then his passion for writing letters was too strong to be resisted; for while we were yet in the height of our excitement, hope, and wonder, the following pastoral note was brought to me from a neighbouring tavern, at which he had called to write it:⁠—

“Most secret and confidential.

“My Dear Sir:⁠—

“I beg to be allowed to convey, through you, my apologies to your excellent aunt for my late excitement. An explosion of a smouldering volcano long suppressed, was the result of an internal contest more easily conceived than described.

“I trust I rendered tolerably intelligible my appointment for the morning of this day week, at the house of public entertainment at Canterbury, where Mrs. Micawber and myself had once the honour of uniting our voices to yours, in the well-known strain of the Immortal exciseman nurtured beyond the Tweed.

“The duty done, and act of reparation performed, which can alone enable me to contemplate my fellow mortal, I shall be known no more. I shall simply require to be deposited in that place of universal resort, where

“Each in his narrow cell forever laid,
The rude forefathers of the hamlet sleep,

“⁠—With the plain Inscription,

“Wilkins Micawber.”

By this time, some months had passed since our interview on the bank of the river with Martha. I had never seen her since, but she had communicated with Mr. Peggotty on several occasions. Nothing had come of her zealous intervention; nor could I infer, from what he told me, that any clue had been obtained, for a moment, to Emily’s fate. I confess that I began to despair of her recovery, and gradually to sink deeper and deeper into the belief that she was dead.

His conviction remained unchanged. So far as I know⁠—and I believe his honest heart was transparent to me⁠—he never wavered again, in his solemn certainty of finding her. His patience never tired. And, although I trembled for the agony it might one day be to him to have his strong assurance shivered at a blow, there was something so religious in it, so affectingly expressive of its anchor being in the purest depths of his fine nature, that the respect and honour in which I held him were exalted every day.

His was not a lazy trustfulness that hoped, and did no more. He had been a man of sturdy action all his life, and he knew that in all things wherein he wanted help he must do his own part faithfully, and help himself. I have known him set out in the night, on a misgiving that the light might not be, by some accident, in the window of the old boat, and walk to Yarmouth. I have known him, on reading something in the newspaper that might apply to her, take up his stick, and go forth on a journey of three or four score miles. He made his way by sea to Naples, and back, after hearing the narrative to which Miss Dartle had assisted me. All his journeys were ruggedly performed; for he was always steadfast in a purpose of saving money for Emily’s sake, when she should be found. In all this long pursuit, I never heard him repine; I never heard him say he was fatigued, or out of heart.

Dora had often seen him since our marriage, and was quite fond of him. I fancy his figure before me now, standing near her sofa, with his rough cap in his hand, and the blue eyes of my child-wife raised, with a timid wonder, to his face. Sometimes of an evening, about twilight, when he came to talk with me, I would induce him to smoke his pipe in the garden, as we slowly paced to and fro together; and then, the picture of his deserted home, and the comfortable air it used to have in my childish eyes of an evening when the fire was burning, and the wind moaning round it, came most vividly into my mind.

One evening, at this hour, he told me that he had found Martha waiting near his lodging on the preceding night when he came out, and that she had asked him not to leave London on any account, until he should have seen her again.

“Did she tell you why?” I inquired.

“I asked her, Mas’r Davy,” he replied, “but it is but few words as she ever says, and she on’y got my promise and so went away.”

“Did she say when you might expect to see her again?” I demanded.

“No, Mas’r Davy,” he returned, drawing his hand thoughtfully down his face. “I asked that too; but it was more (she said) than she could tell.”

As I had long forborne to encourage him with hopes that hung on threads, I made no other comment on this information than that I supposed he would see her soon. Such speculations as it engendered within me I kept to myself, and those were faint enough.

I was walking alone in the garden, one evening, about a fortnight afterwards. I remember that evening well. It was the second in Mr. Micawber’s week of suspense. There had been rain all day,