Made For Loving You (Rescue My Heart Book 3) by Kait Nolan (i can read book club txt) 📕

right call for us under the circumstances. I would have made a lousy military wife. Which is a lot easier to say with the wisdom of years. But it didn’t make it suck any less or any easier to let him go. I grieved for a really, really long time.”

“And so, he became your hero archetype.”

Paisley lifted her mug in a toast. “Got it in one.”

“This explains so much about your work.”

“I love me some second chance romance.”

“Seems like you’ve got one. How did that happen anyway?”

“In a moment of glorious symmetry that I couldn’t have plotted better myself, there was your asshole cousin at your reception, and Ty swept in with the exact same ploy, pretending to be my date.”

Chin in hands, green eyes sparkling, Ivy grinned. “Did you kiss him again?”

“I did.”

“And that, it seems, is the end of that. Again.”

“Maybe.”

“You two give off fireworks when you’re in a room together. Why the lack of confidence?”

“We started out doing this whole casual thing.”

Ivy snorted. “There is nothing casual about the way that man looks at you.”

“I know. But this stalker situation pushed him when I don’t know if he was ready to be pushed. I’m deathly afraid that this is Speed Syndrome.”

“It’s what now?”

“Like you’re afraid, when the bus stops, everything will go kablooey?” Harrison supplied as he stepped into the kitchen and made straight for the coffee pot.

“Yes, exactly. And please, let’s educate your wife about one of Keanu Reeves’ best roles.”

“It’s not her fault. She was a toddler when that came out.”

Paisley winced. “I keep forgetting you’re so much younger than me.”

“I think I understand the concept well enough. You think when the threat to you is gone, he’ll balk.”

“It’s what I’m afraid of. This whole situation, combined with our history, has escalated things between us. And I’m not convinced that’s a good thing.”

Harrison and Ivy exchanged one of those married-people looks that told Paisley this was a topic they’d discussed.

“I have a different theory,” Ivy offered.

“By all means, enlighten me.”

“Do you know that before the last few days, I’ve never seen Ty smile?”

She’d heard the jokes but hadn’t thought much about it. “That wasn’t just Sebastian giving him shit?”

“No. I didn’t meet him until he was already out of the service, after Garrett’s death. He took it incredibly hard, as you’d expect.”

“They were brothers, in every way that mattered,” Paisley murmured. “I’ve still got friends back home, so I knew Garrett had died, but haven’t asked Ty about it. I’m kind of afraid to. How bad was it?”

Harrison kicked back against the counter with a fresh cup of coffee. “Depression. PTSD. Suicide watch. He gave me a helluva shiner when I stopped him from taking a header off a bridge.”

She covered her mouth, already feeling tears begin to fall at the thought of it. So much pain and grief. No matter the circumstances, he’d blame himself because protecting Garrett was the whole reason he’d gone in. This was what he’d meant by wounds that would never heal.

“He shut himself off from everything and almost everyone. Getting him into law enforcement helped. It gave him a new purpose, and that brought him back from the brink. But he hasn’t really been living. Everything but the job has been temporary. You’ve seen his place. He could move out tomorrow and you’d never even know he was there.”

Ivy picked up the thread. “But you broke through all of that. And knowing what I do now, I think you’re maybe the only one who could shake him out of that inertia.”

“Me? Why?”

“There’s this whole transition period when you get out of military service,” Harrison explained, “trying to figure out how the hell to be part of the civilian world. We’ve all been through some measure of it, wondering where we fit. For Rangers in particular, we’re accustomed to being part of a tight team, to knowing those men have our six. Being out, without that backup, it’s easy to feel kind of adrift, even when leaving was a choice. With Garrett and Ty being a unit well before they joined up, his has just been a thousand times worse.”

“Without his best friend as a reference point, Ty doesn’t remember who he is. It’s helped, him moving here to be near Harrison and Sebastian, but it’s not the same. You, though. You were part of his life before the Army. Arguably the biggest part other than Garrett. Your very presence reminds him of how to be him. That history, those patterns you established years ago, back when he was still happy, remind him that he can still be happy. I can’t begin to tell you how thrilled I am that his feelings for you are strong enough to overcome the survivor’s guilt and the idea that he doesn’t deserve to be.”

Why did the idea of that feel like a suffocating pressure? “I don’t even know what to say to that.”

Harrison studied her. “For what it’s worth, Garrett never stopped giving him shit for letting you go. Every time we were stateside, he tried to get Ty to look you up. Ty insisted you were better off without him. He never used your name, or I’d have put two and two together when I met you.”

What would she have done if he’d come back to her on his own, not as a matter of chance? Paisley didn’t know. She’d had fantasies of exactly that for years. In some of them, she’d let the hurt win and turned him away, but knowing how she’d felt when she’d seen him in that reception hall, as if the world that had stopped spinning the day he’d gotten on that bus for basic training had started up again, in all likelihood, she’d have thrown herself willingly into his arms and whatever relationship he’d have given her. Exactly as she’d done now. But if it had been before he’d gotten out, she might have lost him all over again to Garrett’s death. Or worse, to death