You Will Remember Me by Hannah McKinnon (best sales books of all time txt) 📕

her lips together, looking like she might cry. “But I don’t want you to remember everything. I mean, I wish I could forget the pain of losing Mom and Brad. You don’t have any of that anymore, why would you want it back?”

“I don’t think it works that way. How can I leave who I am behind?”

She looked at me with her big, unblinking eyes, and gave me a small nod before getting up. “I’ll be back in a minute,” she said, and headed upstairs where I heard her close her bedroom door softly behind her. It seemed she needed to retreat and regroup as much as I had.

I turned and stared at myself in the hallway mirror, still feeling like I was looking at a stranger. My face seemed to have regained some of its color, and after a good shave I no longer appeared quite so disheveled, but as I examined my features in the reflection, I couldn’t stop my brain from wandering back into dangerous territory.

Was this the face of someone who’d harmed two women? Keenan believed I was responsible for something, but Celine had run away—she’d even left a letter for her family—and the police had ruled Kate’s death an accident. Maya had said I’d been cleared of all suspicion, but no wonder the authorities had wanted to speak to me on both occasions. Had that been why I’d freaked out when I’d seen the cruiser near the beach? Was my anxiety because I’d been subjected to their questioning twice already? I looked away, not wanting to see my expression change as I silently admitted it wasn’t anxiety I’d experienced when I’d come across the police vehicle as much as it had been blind terror.

“Because you felt so messed up,” I whispered, my head snapping up, gazing into my own eyes as I tried to convince myself. “That’s why you panicked, there’s nothing more to it.”

My mind continued to torment me. What if Maya was wrong and I was a bad person, an evil one? Right now, I felt like there was a stranger within, but what would happen if I discovered a monster instead? Surely if I’d hurt Celine in some way to make her leave town or had something to do with Kate’s death, I’d know. Then again, I didn’t remember either of them. Not their names, faces or the sounds of their voices, so how could I be sure? I could tell my anger wanted to resurface so I forced it down.

A little while later I joined Maya in the kitchen, hoping she’d tell me more about Celine and Kate now that we’d both had the opportunity to calm down. She had her back to me, and as she poured something into a sizzling pan, I heard her humming a tune. A song I instantly recognized.

“That’s the White Stripes,” I said, and saw her back stiffen for a second. “‘Seven Nation Army,’” I added, her eyes widening as she turned around, and I felt the need to explain. “There was a T-shirt in the trailer. I remembered the band, but this image of a younger girl kept coming to me... I think...I think it was you.”

Her face lit up, her apparent confusion transforming into a broad smile. “Ash, this is incredible. You remembered something from our past. You remembered me. Meg White was my hero. I dressed up as her three Halloweens in a row.”

The relief I felt from retrieving a memory, something clear but unthreatening, sent a rush of adrenaline through my body. Before I had time to think about it again or change my mind, I said, “You’re right, I should see a doctor. I need to know what’s going on.”

She gasped, put a hand to her throat. “Really? You’ll go see Dr. Adler?”

My initial excitement waned a little but held firm. There was no backing out of this now. “Yeah. Things are coming back and maybe he can help make it happen faster.”

“I’ll come with you. I’ll call him now.”

“No, I’ll do it. If I want to get back to normal, I should start by advocating for myself.”

Maya pulled out her cell, swiped her finger across the screen and handed it to me. As it was the weekend, I didn’t expect Dr. Adler to answer, was preparing to leave a message, but he picked up the phone with a baritone hello.

“Good morning,” I said quickly. “My name is, uh, Asher Bennett.”

“Good morning to you, Mr. Bennett.” His voice rumbled a little, his words neat and precise, measured, and in direct contrast to mine. “How may I help?”

“I need an appointment. I...I’m having trouble with my memory.”

He paused. “What makes you say that?”

“I can’t remember anything before yesterday.”

“Oh, goodness. In that case you’d better come to my practice today.”

We agreed to meet as soon as I could get there and he gave me the address, which I scribbled down before realizing Maya probably didn’t need it. After we hung up, I turned to her, hoping she wouldn’t see how anxious I felt. “We can go now,” I said, “but remember I told you how I felt when I saw the police cruiser? I don’t know why that happened, but...I don’t want to tell Dr. Adler I was in Maryland. Let’s keep that to ourselves for now.”

“Of course. Whatever you say.”

“And when we get back, I want to search for myself online.”

She hesitated, playing with the wooden, seahorse-shaped pendant hanging on a leather strap around her neck. “I spent hours last night doing exactly that when I couldn’t sleep.”

My pulse throbbed in my neck as my throat ran dry. “Did you find anything?”

“No, I’d have told you. Are you sure you came up from Maryland?”

“Yes, that’s where I got in the trailer. Why?”

“Because I ran searches from there to Delaware and New Jersey. Then I added Virginia and the Carolinas, and still nothing. No missing persons, no reports mentioning you and no phone listings, either. It’s as if you’re a ghost.”

“Are you