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when your Quarry senses that you realize how special he is, he is ready for the big guns, killer compliments.

Skilled praise is a powerful magnet. People react powerfully to praise, especially from someone they have just met. Explorations of couples who broke up prove that compliments from a new admirer carried a lot more clout than those from a current love3r.6 If you are currently in a relationship, the competition is tough. Your Quarry becomes immune to many of your casual compliments and wearies of them if they are inappropriate. Taken one for one, a strong on-target compliment from a new admirer is a much more stunning blow.

The same study showed that insults and digs from current lovers, spouses, and friends are more damaging than those from strangers. Because they hold more of a capacity to hurt or offend, current lovers play double jeopardy in the game of love. This is good news for you if you are the newcomer on the scene. Use your advantage. Strike while the iron is hot. If your Quarry is currently in a relationship which is in trouble, your compliments can be a salve to soothe sagging spirits and make your Quarry turn to you for a renewed self-image.

Let us now proceed on the step-by-step plan to make your Quarry feel that he or she has, at long last, found the person with the potential to giveunconditional love.

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Let Your Body Do the Praising

A wise sage once said, "Love is the irresistible desire to be desired irresistibly." When you first meet your Quarry, your body should shout, "I desire you irresistibly. My conscious mind may not know it yet, but see how my body is responding to yours."

Your first praise should be unspoken. You can silently praise your Quarry by showing instinctive body language deference. Upon first spotting him or her, you can even let your eyes do a subtle double take. Look once. Look away. Then let your eyes snap back as though they had a mind of their own.

Whiletalking,maintainprofoundeyecontactwiththiente nsegazetechnique.Use BedroomEyes to make your pupils grow large with appreciation. UseSticky Eyes to make your Quarry feel you

can't take your eyes awayβ€”even during silences.

Make sure your body focuses upon your Quarry's and that you are smiling, leaning slightly forward, and nodding in approvsaol f(ten ).

In short, use the body language techniques we previously discussed. During this crucial initial conversation with your Quarry, make sure you maintain your own confident posture.

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Force any thoughts of "How am I doing?" out of your mind. Your total concentration must be on Page 127

your Quarry and your discovery of how wonderful he or she is. Your demeanor should express, "I'm OKβ€”

and youare wonderful!"

TECHNIQUE #32:

BODY PRAISE

When you meet your Quarry, give the subliminal sense that you are irresistibly drawn to him or her through deferential body language.

Choose from the earlier selection of eye and body techniques to express how he or she has captivated you.

18

"I Can Identify with That!"

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As your Quarry is speaking, the next step is for you to imply rapport. Let your Quarry know you understand and agree with what he or she is saying.

Accomplish this by sprinkling noises or phrases of empathy, understanding, and sympathyβ€”and occasionally your Quarry's nameβ€”throughout your conversation.

You can make simple sounds such as "Um, hum" or a purring "mmm-mmm." Or you can mouth supportive phrases like ' I can understand how you felt," "I can identify with that,'' "I sympathize with you," "I can imagine," or "I'd have done the same thing in your shoes." Use your Quarry's name at well-timed moments. It punctuates the conversation and serves as a potent empathizer.

Here is a conversation, slightly exaggerated, which employs empathizers and well-timed use of your Quarry's name. Let's say you are discussing tennis with a Potential Love Partner to whom you've just been introduced at a party.

Quarry: "No, I haven't played tennis in years. I love tennis, but I broke a couple of fingers in a car accident."

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You: "Oh, that's heart-breaking [empathizer]. You must miss tennis a lot [another empathizer]." Quarry:

"Yeah, I really do. I used to play every week."

You: "Oh, I understand how you feel [empathizer].

It's awful to want to do something so badly and not be able to. Have you found anything to replace your tennis?"

Quarry: "As a matter of fact, yes. Now I do a lot of in-line skating. And I love itβ€”especially the speed."

You: "Oh, that's great, John [using your Quarry's name]. I can identify with that because I love speed, too [more empathizers]."

Obviously you wouldn't use empathizers in nearly every sentence, as the overanxious Hunter above did.

In moderation, however, powdering your

conversation with them soothes your Quarry's ego and makes him or her want to tell you more.

A word of warning. You do not want to come across as a fawning supplicant. Good body language is your insurance policy against that. Be sure to maintain your own poise and assured body position while you empathize with your Quarry.

TECHNIQUE #33:

EMPLOY EMPATHIZERS

Sprinkle empathetic phrases throughout your conversation with your Quarry. Dust your first discussion with phrases like "I see what you mean,"

"Yes, you were right," "I can relate to that,'' and the all-time favorite, ''I understand."

Many men think, early in a relationship, they must impress their female Quarry by telling her something wonderful, unique, interesting, or original about themselves. They try to captivate her with an interesting story, an amazing fact, a hilarious joke.

Even today, most men feel they must display more insights or show more knowledge to boost their status in a relationship.

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No, gentlemen. Early in a relationship it is more effective by far to show empathy with her if your goal is to have her love you. Traditionally, women are not accustomed to having the focus on themselves when they are talking with a new man.

Your Quarry will find you very special if you keep the spotlight on her. (Don't worry, gentlemenβ€”you will have your chance to shine. A woman's instinct is to turn the warm rays around to you.)

In a new friendship, the smallest

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