Diary of an Ugly Duckling by Langhorne, Karyn (general ebook reader .txt) 📕

5 a.m. in California, and the

young producer seemed to take calls on her cell

phone no matter what the hour.

“Hi Audra.” She sounded sleepy, but not even a

little annoyed. “What’s up?”

“I’m sorry to wake you . . . but . . . there’s some-

thing I want you to do for me, if you can,” Audra

said softly into her cell phone. “Someone else, I

want involved with this show. Someone other than

family I want on my contact list . . . and to be invited

to the Reveal—”

“Shouldn’t be a problem,” the woman said pertly,

and Audra could imagine her dark curls waving

over her face as she nodded. “Go.”

“His name is Art Bradshaw . . .” she said, sud-

denly hesitant. “He’s a guy I work with—another

corrections officer—”

“Consider it done,” Shamiyah said, and Audra

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could almost see her scribbling away in that note-

book that seemed to be joined to her body at the

binding. “Bradshaw . . . sounds familiar. Didn’t you

mention him in your audition tape? Wasn’t his

daughter the one who—”

“Yes,” Audra interjected before they could go

tripping down that path again. “But it turns out

there’s a whole lot more to that story. But I’m sure

it’s way too early—”

“Never too early for you, Audra,” Shamiyah said,

sounding fully awake. “Tell, tell, girl. I want to hear

it all.”

With a sigh of relief, Audra spilled the story from

start to finish, sparing no detail. She spent some

time describing the picture of a much heavier

Esmeralda—she felt like she’d memorized every

detail of the woman now—to Art’s compliments, to

his last remarks about getting together. Shamiyah

listened, interrupting only for questions of clarifi-

cation, and when the story was told in its entirety,

she absorbed it in silence for a long moment before

asking, “Anything else?”

Audra hesitated. “Tell me I’m doing the right

thing again,” she said, a little surprised by the

plaintiveness of her own voice. “Tell me I’m doing

the right thing . . . by becoming an Ugly Duckling.

Maybe . . . maybe . . .” Audra struggled with the

words. “Maybe I’m okay the way I am . . . maybe I

shouldn’t be doing this after all.”

There was a second’s hesitation on the other end

of the phone, then Shamiyah said, “Why? Are you

having second thoughts?”

“Well, yes,” Audra admitted. “I mean, he said I

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was beautiful. He said I had grace and humor. Me!

Maybe—”

“You’re doing the right thing,” Shamiyah said re-

assuringly. “You’re building yourself a brand new

future, Audra. I mean, look at the confidence you’ve

gained already. A few weeks ago, would you have had

the nerve to invite this Bradshaw guy to the show?

Would you?”

Audra considered. “I don’t think so . . .” she said

at last. “No.”

“See what I mean? The changes you’re making on

the outside are giving you the courage to make

changes on the inside!” she enthused. “Imagine what

you’ll be like when you’ve completed the whole pro-

cess. You’ll be a powerhouse, Audra! An absolute

powerhouse!” Audra imagined her nodding so hard,

her head full of springy curls were dancing a jig.

“Don’t let any of this stuff he said confuse you.”

“But maybe he’s right. I mean, I have lost weight.

It’s been really hard, but I know I look better. Be-

sides . . .” She swallowed. “This lightening thing

makes me nervous. Maybe I’ve done enough al-

ready. Maybe I should just quit.”

“All because some guy said you were ‘beautiful

just the way you are,’ ” she said, pitching her voice

in a mincing imitation that made the words sound

shallow and lifeless. “Come on, Audra. That one’s

right up there with a ‘good personality.’ It’s code for

‘not my type.’ ”

Audra frowned. “But he asked if he could call me

sometime—”

“He asked you to his daughter’s party, too. Had

he talked to you since? No.” Shamiyah answered

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herself before Audra could get her mouth around

the word. “Heck, he wasn’t even looking for you to-

day. You said yourself he just happened to work a

double shift. If it hadn’t been for that, you still

wouldn’t have heard a word from him—”

“But he’s been dealing with a lot of family prob-

lems. With Esmeralda and—”

“Yeah, yeah. You’ve got some things to learn about

men, Audra.” Shamiyah sounded like she was

rolling her eyes. “Let me lay some knowledge on you,

sister girl.” She paused for dramatic effect, using the

silence as well as in any movie scene. “When a man

is really into you, he can find his way to your tele-

phone and your workplace and your front door. It

doesn’t matter what else is going on his life. When

he’s really interested, he’ll find a way to make sure

you know it.” She let that sink in a second before

adding in her worldly, know-it-all way, “I bet when

he first met Esmeralda, she didn’t have to spend

three months guessing what was going on with him.

I bet she didn’t have to wait until she happened to run

into him at work. No way. I bet he was sniffing

around after her with his nose wide open!”

“What you’re saying makes sense, Shamiyah,”

Audra agreed. “It’s just . . . I don’t know. I believed

him, I guess—”

“You believed him,” Shamiyah repeated the

words, her voice heavy with skepticism. “Well, I

guess we’ll just have to wait and see what he does

next, then, right? We’ll have to see if he calls. He’s

got your phone number, right?”

Audra squirmed a little. “I don’t know,” she ad-

mitted. “I don’t think so.”

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“Let me get