Rewrite the Stars by Christina Consolino (books for 8th graders .txt) 📕

friends for so long, she read into my voice like no one else, but I had no plans to inform her I’d made no progress on the suggestion she’d made many Saturdays ago.

“Yeah, well, sure. Call me back when you have a chance.”

The phone dimmed, and I placed it onto my lap, surprised Kate had let our conversation, or lack thereof, go so easily. Kate had never let anything go so simply, ever, and despite my first thought, my mind wondered if she had an ulterior motive in not drawing out the conversation. What was she trying to tell me? Was she still annoyed about the last time we’d seen each other?

That had been a month ago, long after she’d given me advice and at a time when she’d tried to push Theo into seeing a new therapist. Kate was into homeopathic means of relief and sometimes shunned traditional Western medicine. She felt if Theo admitted to a negative mindset, he’d be better able to resolve his issues. I’d often brushed aside what she had to say when it came to medical issues, but the day Kate told me of her negative mindset theory, I had exploded at her and questioned her credibility. We’d exchanged daggers—I’d accused her of making everything about her, and she’d done the same of me—and since that day, our closeness had waned.

Her phone call reminded me to check in with Theo, who would be home from work already.

You home? All okay? I texted.

All good. Thanks. He replied.

With the kids at the arboretum. Will be home soon.

Have fun.

I texted back a thumbs up.

Between the tree limbs, the rays of afternoon sun streamed onto my shoulders, warming them, and the smell of the loamy soil filled my nose as I ambled along the empty path to find Brooke and the kids. November in the arboretum was lovely, thankfully, and the beauty and simplicity of the natural surroundings soothed my mind, which ached with unanswered questions about Andrew, about Theo. About me.

But with the thought of Andrew, a giddiness erupted within me, my heart raced, and tingles broke out all over. All over. And while I was sure now, after his admission, we would go nowhere, the whole scenario was too much to deal with. The muscles of my back and shoulders tightened, and I twisted my fingers into the fabric of my skirt as I cursed myself for being in the same place I was back on Father’s Day. How was I in the exact mental place?

If things had only been different, I thought, and stomped my foot against the damp earth. If Theo hadn’t gone to Afghanistan, then we’d be fine. If Theo didn’t have PTSD, then I wouldn’t be in the middle of what was supposed to be a divorce, and I’d never have noticed Andrew at the grocery store. If I cared about Theo, then I’d be doing more to help him get better. If, if, if. That’s all I focused on these days. I couldn’t live my life inside a bunch of if-then statements; I’d never been good with them anyway.

The tap of a woodpecker narrowed my focus as I wound around a copse of pine trees. A fallen log had formed a nice stopping point, a place where the kids and I liked to rest our weary legs. I sat hard, too hard in fact, and the usual tears pricked against my eyelids, which caused the torrent to begin. The droplets fell to the ground, splashing onto the debris, displacing dust. With nothing left in my heart, I left my head fall forward into my hands, and I sobbed.

A quick beep from my phone alerted me to a text.

Nothing urgent! A message from Kate, which included a smiley face.

I should have asked her if she needed something. I should have apologized for my outburst about the “negative mindset.” Had she been right that day months ago—that I thought it was all about me? Another stink bug caught my eye. Had the one I’d seen earlier crossed from the stick to tree trunk? Was he successful in his quest?

Having no way to know, I imagined he succeeded and crossed into his desired territory. If he could do it, so could I.

Chapter 18: Theo

I had always trusted Sadie to make the right choices, but when she surprised the entire family with her getaway idea, doubts plagued me. Big doubts.

“All right, kids, we’re going on vacation!” Time seemed to stop in the kitchen as Sadie strode in with her arms wide open and cheeks bunched up from smiling.

“What? What do you mean, Mom?” Charlie asked. He hurtled from his seat at the breakfast bar and planted his body in front of his mother. “What about school? Film club? Piano? I’m going to miss a lot...” He looked like I felt sometimes: defeated, his small shoulders slumping, almost imperceptibly. He’d been having fun with school and with everything after school—so I’d been told. It was possible the activity took his mind off everything happening at home.

“Don’t worry, Charlie. Part of this vacation spans Thanksgiving break, so you won’t be missing as much school. If you don’t want to go, we won’t. But you’re a great student, and you’ll be fine.” She put away the few items she had picked up from the grocery store and opened the window an inch. The cool fall breeze slipped in and brought dampness with it. A second later, Sadie cranked the window shut again. Rejected the harshness. To be able to crank my life closed at times.

The last few weeks had been ugly. In the morning, when it was time to get the kids moving and out the door, my usual “Let’s move it, kids! What’s wrong with you?” resulted in a resounding cringe from the kids and a “Really, Theo? It’s more than just your tone!” from Sadie.

She tried to remind me whenever my “tone” was off, which happened most often when it was time for