Shifters: A Samantha Reece Mystery Book 1 by Jaime Johnesee (libby ebook reader txt) 📕

break ours?" Okay, so apparently subtle wasn't going to be the way I went about this.

I suppose I hadn't really made the decision I spoke about earlier until I blurted it out on my own.

"There are no such things as sire bonds. They’re not real."

"No, but you don't understand. This isn't right. The way I feel about you aren’t my feelings. There must be a sire bond at play. Don't you feel it?"

"What I feel is the same thing I felt for you the first time I saw you in the park, attraction. Can't you just believe we are meant to be? Does there really have to be something like a sire bond for you to have feelings for me?" Ben slid his hand up my arm to my shoulder and crouched in front of me on the couch.

"Yes, dammit."

"Am I that awful to you?" He looked hurt.

"No, it's just.... Look, I know how to control my emotions and I can't with you. Things are so messy and insane with you and I can't just shove them away like I usually can. When you add in the fact that, no offense, I sort of hate you for blowing up my life, it sounds wholly supernatural to me."

There, argument made.

Go me.

I expected him to step back, but he just smiled and said softly, "That's not a sire bond, that's a soul mate bond."

"Ben." I scooted down the couch to get a bit of breathing room between us.

"Sam, are you never going to give in to those feelings because you, wrongly, think they're fake?"

"Possibly. Look, all you need to know is that, right now, I can't do this. How about we stay on separate chairs and try and keep it friendly until my relief gets here. We may even be able to pull protective detail from you tonight. We don't think Grisly saw you as a threat. He'd have been here by now if he did."

"So, you're just going to ignore all this chemistry between us?"

“Until it goes away, or I find a way to break it, you bet I am.” My jaguar seemed to be laughing at me with equal measure disdain and superiority.

She liked Ben and seemed to think I should, too. The problem was I didn’t want to like Ben. I wanted to go back to being able to control my feelings. I’m not a fluffy feelings kind of chick.

Too much pain has forced me to really take a look at the people I surround myself with. I didn’t want to end up losing everything on something where the only basis was that we were part time panthers.

“Fine. Just know this, Sam, feelings like we have don’t just go away. No matter how badly you wish they would.” He leaned forward on the couch and stared into my eyes as he spoke.

Then he promptly stood up, walked over to, and sat down on the recliner across the room. Once he was seated I flicked my foot rest up. I needed that distance to keep myself from doing something I very much wanted to do but knew I’d regret later.

Stupid fucking sire bonds.

“Maybe they do, maybe they don’t. I won’t know until I find out more about sire bonds. Maybe all I need to do is a quick spell and once it’s over perhaps we won’t even like each other.”

“Then why was I so attracted to you when you were human? Why were you so attracted to my jaguar in the park?”

“I don’t know. Look, I’m not a romantic. It’s not in my nature. What is going on only has one explanation and it’s got to be supernatural in origin.”

“You don’t believe in soul mates, so, in your point of view, this connection we both feel has to be a bond from us being shifters?”

“In a nutshell, yeah.”

“God, that’s a sad way to live.”

“Well, it’s gotten me this far in life and I suspect it’ll get me much further.”

“Point taken.”

“Good.” I nodded, crossed my feet, and leaned back in the recliner.

“Want to watch Wheel of Fortune?”

“Sure, why not?”

In my opinion, watching a game show was about the least sexy thing you could do with another being. Unless you were really into that stuff, and I wasn’t. Though that big wheel held promise.

Stop it, Sam! I had to get myself out of that way of thinking. It didn’t help that I was in the midst of a three year dry spell.

While I’d dated some, I hadn’t slept with any of them because of my cat. None of them were deemed worthy enough in her eyes and so she wanted nothing to do with any of the choices I’d laid out for her. When she wasn’t interested I didn’t feel interested, either.

It had been a long three years.

Of course she would be interested in the one guy I wanted nothing to do with. But that wasn’t completely true; I did want something to do with him. He intrigued me in a way that had nothing to do with my jaguar and everything to do with him as a person. He seemed fairly genuine in his apologies and I was starting to think that he wasn't really that much of a pompous ass the more time we spent together.

"Cheeseballs?"

“What?”

“Would you like some cheeseballs?”

“Like actual balls of cheese or the puffy cheese-dust covered things?”

“The latter.” Ben grinned and my jaguar melted a bit.

Did he have to be so good looking? It was like someone had set a delicious chocolate fudge cake right in front of me by mistake, instead of the poached salmon with wild rice I’d actually ordered.

As much as I wanted to give in and eat the fudge cake, I knew I’d regret the sugar crash that came later. It was best if I just quit while I was ahead. I enjoyed the little boost my ego was getting from his attraction to me. My jaguar enjoyed his company as well. That would have to be good enough for me.

I should