Amber by Heather Burnside (fb2 epub reader .txt) 📕

Amy noticed his menacing tone and she listened while he elucidated. ‘No more presents for you or your mum, that’s what. And your mum wouldn’t be happy with you if I stopped bringing presents, would she? Not to mention all the other nice things I do for her. In fact, she’d probably blame you and you’d be in big trouble.’

His words hit home when she thought about how happy her mother was whenever Cliff was around and how he made sure the family never wanted for anything. Then she thought about how sad her mother had been when the relationship with Dale had ended. Her thoughts relayed a distressing medley of scenes:

Her mother’s sorrow after Dale’s last phone call. Finding her unconscious one day after school. The neighbours’ reactions to Loretta’s suicide attempt. Being rushed to her grandparents’. Sitting in their house worrying whether her mum was going to be alright.

She didn’t say anything, but she lay still in the bed, her body foetal with Cliff wrapped around her, as she unwillingly accepted her fate.

When she felt his hands graze her breasts, she flinched but he carried on. This time he delved deeper, his hands travelling down her body and his fingers probing as he explored her nubile flesh. She could feel his penis pressing ardently against the back of her. Amy had heard about the things men did, and she feared that it might be about to happen to her.

She shut her eyes and pretended it wasn’t happening, her mind numb and her body stiff and unresponsive. Amy was glad when it was over and relieved that he hadn’t tried to put his thing inside her.

As he got up from the bed, he issued a warning, ‘Not a word of this, do you hear?’

Amy nodded her head, feeling the sting of tears.

‘Right, I’m going now but I want you to be ready for me next time I come. And no crying. You’re a big girl now. I need you to do as you’re told and no squealing to anyone or you know what will happen, don’t you?’

He waited for Amy to nod again before he added, ‘Your mother will be furious with you!’

When he left the room, tears flooded her eyes. She felt invaded, dirty, ashamed, and for a long time she lay there reliving her ordeal, sobbing desperately and unable to sleep.

Seeking comfort, she grabbed at her favourite teddy, Barney, and pulled him into the bed with her, clinging to him and stemming her tears against his mangy fur. He was old and ragged, but he was also unthreatening and at this moment Amy needed to feel safe.

33

October 2015

It was late at night and Amber was standing in her usual spot having decided that she’d service another client before going home. She had been fearful ever since being attacked by Cora and Jack a few weeks previously. But, following Cora’s death, she was even more frightened. Ideally, she could have done with making some extra cash but the longer she stayed out the more afraid she was, and it was becoming increasingly difficult to carry on working.

As she stood there, she felt persistently jumpy. Every car that stopped, every person who passed by and every sound presented a threat. In fact, she didn’t know which was worse: standing at the mouth of the secluded railway arch or getting in a car with a complete stranger. With all those anxieties whirling around inside her head she was glad that it was almost the end of the night for her.

Apart from being frightened, Amber was hungry. As usual her mother hadn’t bothered getting any shopping in, so she had come out to work with hardly any food inside her, promising herself that she’d call at the late-night kebab shop before she went home.

She comforted herself with the thought that not only would she soon be able to leave the red-light district for the night, but she’d also get something to eat even if it was yet another kebab.

She saw a group of young men walking towards her. They looked animated, possibly a bit drunk, and she prepared herself to do battle. As they advanced, she gazed intently at them, trying to gauge the opposition. She saw them approach another street girl and a verbal exchange took place, but they didn’t hang around.

They were drawing closer and the other street girl had since got into a punter’s car. To Amber’s consternation, there was nobody else around apart from two people who she could just about spot far off in the distance. She couldn’t tell whether the couple were male or female, but they were heading towards her. She realised, however, that it would be a while before they drew level.

The young men were now only a few metres away and she noticed how they glanced at her and then chatted and giggled amongst themselves. It wasn’t a good sign and instinct told Amber that they would be a problem.

She counted five of them altogether. At the front of the group was a short, stocky lad and next to him was one of average height with ginger hair. These two looked more animated than the rest of the group and she guessed that they would be the chief troublemakers.

Even as they approached, she was thinking of witty put-down lines she could use. This often helped to switch the focus of the group from herself to the men who she was ridiculing, rather like a comedian dealing with hecklers in the audience.

As she had predicted, the short man was the first to make a move. He broke away from the group and walked nearer to her, grabbing his crotch and bending his knees as he put each foot forward in turn, like a parody of a primitive dance.

‘Fancy a bit of this love?’ he asked.

‘Not if that’s all you’ve got to offer,’ quipped Amber.

His mates roared with laughter, but the stocky man came back at her: ‘I’ve got a good