How It Ends by Catherine Lo (classic books for 13 year olds .TXT) 📕
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- Author: Catherine Lo
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I had a feeling things were going to get ugly today. What if they fought in the cafeteria? What if Annie came to me crying? What if she found out that I stabbed her in the back and she confronted me?
Not to mention my panic about the whole anxiety thing getting out. I was sure everyone would be talking about how I barfed all over Courtney after mixing alcohol with my crazy girl medication. Who could resist repeating a story like that?
I spent all night on Facebook and Twitter, searching compulsively for any references to me. Were people laughing at me? Were they saying I’m crazy?
I couldn’t find anything, though. It was as if Saturday night never happened. Which was even freakier, somehow. At least if I’d found evidence, I’d know what to expect.
By the time I got to school, I was a jumpy mess. I tried to put my head down and ignore everyone, but all my senses were heightened. I was aware of every whisper, every averted gaze, and every bout of laughter in the halls. My therapist would say that I was interpreting people’s actions through the lens of my anxiety and that I should use my strategies to remind myself that their behaviors likely had nothing to do with me at all. But my therapist is pretty much full of crap, because she’s never had to walk a high school hallway after being exposed as a freakshow mental case.
The only thing worse than the stares of my fellow students was my worry about the Annie situation. I expected her to be depressed or hysterical or angry. I expected drama. But when I caught sight of her in the hallway, she was walking along with Courtney, laughing.
My first thought was, She hasn’t talked to Scott yet.
My second thought was, What a bitch. Because she should be mad at Courtney for what happened to me at the party. Courtney shamed me and betrayed Annie’s confidence. Why were they walking along like nothing had happened?
So much for Annie’s whining messages about how much I mean to her.
The anger calmed my nerves, and some of my guilt evaporated.
By second period I was slumped in my seat in history, staring at the back of Annie’s head and hating her. She’d been ignoring me the whole class. For someone who claimed to be sorry, she sure wasn’t showing it.
My anger bottomed out and was replaced by cold fear when she suddenly went rigid in her chair and started texting frantically. When the bell rang, she gathered up her stuff and made a beeline for the door.
I swung out of my desk and followed her into the hallway, where a familiar-looking girl stepped into my path, making me trip and drop my books everywhere.
“I’m so sorry, Jessie,” she said, bending down to help me gather my stuff.
“It’s okay,” I muttered, searching up and down the hallway for Annie. I had no idea which way she’d gone.
I took the last of my books from the girl and started toward the cafeteria, hoping to find Annie there, but the girl stepped back in front of me. “Jessie?”
Oh, great, I thought as I recognized her. It was the new girl—Charlie’s girlfriend. “Yeah?”
“Um . . . my name’s Jody. Charlie said he told you about me? I was just wondering if you wanted to sit with us at lunch today.”
“What?” I needed to find Annie, and this Jody girl was seriously starting to annoy me.
“I know you normally eat with Courtney, but I thought you might need someone to sit with today.”
I felt my chest constrict. “Why would you think that?”
She shrugged. “I heard about what happened over the weekend, and I thought you might need a friend today.”
“Thanks anyway,” I said, skirting around her. “I’m good.”
I raced to the cafeteria but couldn’t find Annie anywhere. She wasn’t in line or at Courtney’s table. I scanned the other tables, wondering if she and Scott were sitting alone together, but there was no sign of either of them. Where could they be?
I checked every stairwell, peeked into the bathrooms, and scoped out the field. I was frantic all afternoon. Annie didn’t go to any classes after lunch. I waited outside each of her classrooms until the bell rang, hoping to catch a glimpse of her.
I checked her Twitter account on my phone, but she hadn’t tweeted since the weekend. I even trolled Courtney’s Facebook for any gossip, but there was nothing.
Not even the whispers of freak and psycho I heard in the halls could distract me from my thoughts about Annie. I needed to know what was happening, but I was locked out of her life.
After the final bell rang, I came home and lied about having a big assignment so I could monitor her online activity. But Annie is completely silent. I even tried re-adding her as a friend on Facebook, but she hasn’t responded. No one is saying anything online.
I’ve never been more aware of how isolated I am than tonight. It’s as if I have absolutely no connection to the world outside my head. There are life-changing things happening, but I’m so far adrift that the ripples don’t even reach me.
Annie
You’re being paranoid, I tell myself, hunching my shoulders and scanning the hallway for Scott. I have that ticklish feeling I get on the back of my neck whenever people are staring at me.
I wasn’t ready when I talked to Scott yesterday. Everything came out all wrong. I need to find him this morning and make things right.
I head toward his locker, trying to shake off the sensation that people are whispering about me. No one else knows, I remind myself. Stop freaking out.
I yelp as a hand reaches out of the crowd and grabs me. “Holy shit, Larissa,” I squeak out. “You scared me.”
She searches my
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