More Language of Letting Go: 366 New Daily Meditations by Melody Beattie (classic books for 10 year olds TXT) 📕

August 2

InBetween

Sometimes, to get from where we are to where we are going, we have to be willing to be inbetween.

Page 219

One of the hardest parts of recovery is the concept of letting go of what is old and familiar, but what we don't want, and being willing to stand with our hands empty while we wait for God to fill them.

This may apply to feelings. We may have been full of hurt and anger. In some ways, these feelings may have become comfortably familiar. When we finally face and relinquish our grief, we may feel empty for a time. We are in between pain and the joy of serenity and acceptance.

Being inbetween can apply to relationships. To prepare ourselves for the new, we need to first let go of the old. This can be frightening. We may feel empty and lost for a time. We may feel all alone, wondering what is wrong with us for letting go of the proverbial birdinhand, when there is nothing in the bush.

Being inbetween can apply to many areas of life and recovery. We can be in between jobs, careers, homes, or goals. We can be in between behaviors as we let go of the old and are not certain what we will replace it with. This can apply to behaviors that have protected and served us well all of our life, such as caretaking and controlling.

We may have many feelings going on when we're inbetween: spurts of grief about what we have let go of or lost, and feelings of anxiety, fear, and apprehension about what's ahead. These are normal feelings for the inbetween place. Accept them. Feel them. Release them.

Being inbetween isn't fun, but it's necessary. It will not last forever. It may feel like we're standing still, but we're not. We're standing at the inbetween place. It's how we get from here to there. It is not the destination.

We are moving forward, even when we're inbetween.

Today, I will accept where I am as the ideal place for me to be. If I am inbetween, I will strive for the faith that this place is not without purpose, that it ismoving me toward something good.

Page 220

August 3

Owning Our Power in Relationships

So much of what I call my codependency is fear and panic because I spent so much of my life feeling abused, trapped, and not knowing how to take care of myself in relationships.

—Anonymous

No matter how long we have been recovering, we may still tend to give up our power to others, whether they be authority figures, a new love, or a child.

When we do this, we experience the set of emotions and thoughts we call "the codependent crazies" We may feel angry, guilty, afraid, confused, and obsessed. We may feel dependent and needy or become overly controlling and rigid. We may return to familiar behaviors during stress. And for those of us who have codependency and adult children issues, relationships can mean stress.

We don't have to stay stuck in our codependency. We don't have to shame or blame ourselves, or the other person, for our condition. We simply need to remember to own our power.

Practice. Practice. Practice using your power to take care of yourself, no matter who you are dealing with, where you are, or what you are doing. This is what recovery means. This does not mean we try to control others; it does not mean we become abrasive or abusive. It means we own our power to take care of ourselves.

The thought of doing this may generate fears. That's normal! Take care of yourself anyway. The answers, and the power to do that, are within you now.

Start today. Start where you are. Start by taking care of who you are, at the present moment, to the best of your ability.

Page 221

Today, I will focus on owning my power to take care of myself. I will not let fears, or a false sense of shame and guilt, stop me from taking care of myself.

August 4

Vulnerability

I've learned that the more vulnerable I allow myself to be, the more in control of myself I really am.

—Anonymous

Many of us feel that we can only show our strong, confident side. We believe the face we have to show to the world should always be one of politeness, perfection, calm, strength, and control.

While it is certainly good and often appropriate to be in control, calm, and strong, there is another side to all of us—that part of us that feels needy, becomes frightened, has doubts, and gets angry. That part of us that needs care, love, and reassurance that things will be okay. Expressing these needs makes us vulnerable and less than perfect, but this side needs our acceptance too.

Allowing ourselves to be vulnerable will help us build lasting relationships. Sharing our vulnerabilities helps us feel close to people and helps others feel close to us. It helps us grow in selflove and selfacceptance. It helps us become healing agents. It allows us to become whole and accessible to others.

Today, I will allow myself to be vulnerable with others when it's safe and appropriate to do so.

Page 222

August 5

Attitudes Toward Money

Sometimes, our life and history may be so full of pain that we think it totally unfair that we have to grow up now and be financially responsible for ourselves.

The feeling is understandable; the attitude is not healthy. Many people in recovery may believe that certain people in particular, and life in general, owe them a living after what they've been through.

To feel good about ourselves, to find the emotional peace and freedom we're seeking in recovery, we need healthy boundaries about money—what we give to others, and what we allow ourselves to receive from others.

Do we feel that others owe us money because we cannot take care of ourselves? Do we believe others owe us because we do not have as much money as they do?

Do we consciously or