Myth 18 - MythChief by Asprin, Robert (good non fiction books to read .TXT) 📕

“I would never do anything like that.” I protested. “I never saw your displays. In fact. I have spent the last week trying to deal with the damage you did to me and MY cli-​ent. Poor Hermalaya hasn't been so embarrassed in her life. People ate calling her a phony. She's the most genuine person in the world! She used to be a respected head of state, and now she's an action figure. I fee! responsible for setting her up-​for putting her in a position where some-​one i used to trust more than anybody could make her feel like a fool.”

“Used to trust?” The veins in Aahz's eyes burst into re-​lief. "Listen, you Klahdish pip-​squeak

A piercing whistle burst in my eardrums. Both of us stopped talking. Bunny removed two fingers from her mouth.

“Gentlemen! If I may use that term without bursting into cynical laughter. You.” she pointed at me. “I already heard from you. You!” she pointed at Aahz. “What is Skeeve supposed to have done to you?”

Aahz glanced sideways at Matfany, who was holding himself aloof from interacting with any of us. He looked pretty disgusted, not that I cared what he thought. I was glad that Hermalaya wasn't safely back in Possiltum.

“I . . . made deals with a number of prominent busi-​nessmen who would take an interest in Foxe-​Swampburg in exchange for financial consideration. It involves a cer-​tain amount of visible advertising on local landmarks.”

“Glaring, vulgar displays,” Matfany added.

“Yeah, it all depends on how you look at it!” Aahz snapped. I could see the honeymoon was long over between the two of them. “I conceded to local interests to . . .”

“... Tone them down a little,” Tananda put in, when Aahz had hesitated too long. “Yeah! They were toned down!”

“To a dull roar,” Matfany put in. “Let me finish!” Aahz bellowed. Bunny held up a thumb and forefinger and brought them together Everybody else closed their mouths. “Go on,” she said to Aahz.

He frowned. “From that point, they should have been fine. Then, all of a sudden, the images started fading right off the rocks and buildings. Whole billboards disappeared overnight! Salamanders started going out, or they lost their grip and fell. The Firedrakes' Union steward complained to the Geek, and he came to me. Matfany's guards ques-​tioned the protesters ...”

“Protesters?” I asked.

“Shut up,” Aahz said. “They didn't have anything to do with it. The whole mess smacked of magikal interference.” He glared at me. “And who has the greatest interest in see-​ing me fail? Skeeve!”

“I didn't do anything!” I said. "Bunny, you have to be-​lieve me. I haven't been in Foxe-​Swampburg. I never got near any of his arrangements. What about Matfany? From what i hear, he's underhanded enough to cause trouble! Look what he did to Hermalaya''

The Swamp Fox was outraged. “Sir. you have no right to make such accusations.” “He's just trying to misdirect you,” Aahz said. Typical behavior of someone who is guilty,"

“How could you, Skeeve?” Tananda asked, woe in her dark green eyes. “Attacking someone you don't even know. It's just so unlike you.”

“It's unlike me because it wasn't me! I mean, I thought about it. Who wouldn't, after everything started to go wrong with our plans?”

“Your plans went wrong because you set them all up wrong,” Aahz said, with grim glee. “Everything I ever taught you about exploiting a situation to the fullest, you seem to have forgotten. Sitting in that inn seems to have rotted your brain. Such as it is Klahds just don't have a lot of basic intelligence.”

The whistle called time-​out on our argument again.

“Enough with the personal remarks,” Bunny said. “Some of the rest of us are Klahds, too, you know”

“No offense,” Aahz said.

“I didn't sabotage anything,” I said. “How can I prove that? I can't prove a negative. Look, I have been with Massha, Nunzio, Chumley, or Hermalaya almost every minute I haven't been in here.”

Chumley raised a forefinger. “I say, he's right, but it doesn't take long to upset the apple cart, what? I have to be fair, Skeeve, old boy. I know you did dash in and out a few times. I'd be very disappointed if you were going off to interfere with the other side, what?”

I felt more alone than I had ever been before. “I don't know how I can convince you. I didn't do anything wrong. You have to believe me. I give you my word I wasn't in-​volved in anything Aahz did failing.”

Aahz was gloating. “If that's your story, then I didn't do anything wrong, either.” “All right, all right,” Bunny said, holding up her hands. "Then, here's the new ground rules: both of you

stay away from the other. You don't interfere in what the other one is doing. You don't go near each other anywhere except here. Any conversations you have from now until the end of this contest will be held in front of witnesses, preferably in this office. Any more bad behavior means you automatically concede the contest to your opponent. Do I make myself clear?"

Very grudgingly, I choked out a yes. So did Aahz.

“Good. Both of you go away. You've been in here too long. Help your clients. Stay out of trouble. That's all. Beat it.” Bunny sat down at her secretary desk and opened her copy of The Princess's Diary.

We all looked at each other. Aahz gave me a smirk. BAMF! He, Matfany, Tananda, and Guido