I Love You More Than I'm Afraid (Our Forevers #2) by Rebel Hart (the first e reader .txt) 📕

about her. She’s so perfect and everything comes to her so effortlessly. This stuff that I have to try and try and try at, she does with the snap of a finger. She’s so confident and comfortable with who she is and it makes me angry that nothing I do ever seems to measure up to her.” I buried my head against my legs and started sobbing. “I hate that I won’t ever mean as much to you or to Arden as she does. I love you both so much and it hurts me every day knowing that you’re both slipping from me because of her. But I swear, Tristan, I didn’t mean for her to get hurt. I wanted her to feel some of the pain I felt, but I didn’t want this.”

There was silence in the wake of my confession. I expected that Tristan was angry, but then I heard the chair creak and felt a hand on mine. It pulled and I looked up to see Tristan’s eyes full of tears and anguish. He continued to pull my hand and I relented to his pull, letting him drag me to my feet and eventually into a hug. It was so much more than I deserved for all the pain I caused, but I took it anyway, bawling into Tristan’s chest.

“I’m sorry,” I whined.

“Hannah…” He let out a sigh. “What else could I have done to prove to you how much I love you?”

I stepped back from him, surprised. “What?”

“I tried. I tried telling you and I tried showing you. I went out of my way, I canceled plans with Aria, I was there for you about Arden as much you would let me. Every day I tried to do at least one thing to show you that you were my best friend and mean the world to me. What do you mean you don’t mean as much to me as Aria? Frankly, the only reason that I can’t love you as much as I love her…” He paused and looked into my eyes. “Is because you won’t let me.”

I sucked in air and my hands flew to my mouth. Was that true? I was the problem all along?

“Tristan.” We looked over and Arden was standing just outside the waiting room. “Aria’s awake.”

21

Arden

I was glad to see that Tristan and Hannah seemed to be able to bridge the gap between them given what had happened. When I announced that Aria had woken up, Tristan actually looked conflicted that he had to leave, but Hannah quickly pushed him away from her.

“Go, go, it’s okay. I’ll be here,” she said.

Tristan gave Hannah one final hug and then turned around and started walking in my direction. Just as he was headed my way, Aria’s mom came bolting in through the front door.

“Serene,” I said.

“Is she awake yet?” she asked in a panic.

“She just woke up,” Tristan answered. “I’m going to see her now.”

“I’ll come with.” I thought she was going to run straight past me, but she ran straight up to me and wrapped her arms around me. “Hi sweetie.”

I immediately started sobbing in her arms. Though I knew she had to get to Aria, I couldn’t stop myself from throwing my arms around her back and squeezing tightly. “I’m so sorry!”

“This isn’t your fault,” she said in a soft, motherly voice. “We all make mistakes. You never could have predicted or prevented this.” She leaned away from me and put a hand on my face. “I love you.”

I nodded. “I love you too. Go. I’m sure she’s waiting for you.” She ran between Tristan and I and rushed into the trauma ward and Tristan looked at me, looking as exhausted as if he’d been awake for ten days straight. “I’m sure she’s waiting for you too. You should go.”

He looked over his shoulder at Hannah, who was back to sitting in one of the chairs with her head down in her lap. “The real reason Aria got hurt is because you two are lying to each other and yourselves.”

It was a difficult pill to swallow, but a necessary one. “Yeah.”

“Go talk to her,” he said. “Actually talk.”

“I will,” I replied. “Now go. Let me know when I can come see her.”

He tapped me on my back and followed off after Aria’s mom and I took a deep breath and walked over to where Hannah was sitting. I could see her back lifting and lowering slowly and it broke my heart. I always hated seeing her cry.

Rather than sitting in the chair next to her because I felt like I couldn’t see her well enough that way, I sat on the floor in front of her. I crossed my legs and just watched her for a minute. It’d been so long since I’d had a conversation with Hannah that wasn’t laced with ire that I’d damn near forgotten how to do it. I was so clouded by being angry because of what happened between us that I didn’t see the way my words and actions were whipping up a storm that was swallowing up everything around it.

I hated that it took my best friend getting hurt for me to see it, but Tristan was right, this unfinished business between Hannah and I was the worst kind of toxic. Overhearing her outburst to Tristan put everything into perspective. She was hurting just as much as I was. Even if I didn’t understand, because it was her who ended things to begin with, it didn’t make it any less of a fact.

“Hey,” I started quietly. I lifted my hand to touch her, but stopped, dropping my hand back to my lap.

She sniffled. “Hi.”

“This is bad,” I said.

She nodded her head against her lap. “Yeah.” Then she lifted her head and looked up at me. Her eyes were puffy and red, and the edge of her nose was brimming and looked sore from constant wiping. “I’m so sorry.”

I just shook my