Myth 13 - Myth Alliances by Asprin, Robert (ebook reader online free .txt) π
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βWe do not wish to be late, Master Skeeve,β Gubbeen reminded me, watching through the window as the sun climbed with distressing rapidity up the eastern edge of the sky.
βThen I won't waste your time,β I said. βI'm ready to fulfill the deal we made, but to succeed I am going to need your help.β
βUs! W ... w ... well, you're the one Wensley hired,β Ardrahan protested.
I raised an eyebrow. βHow badly do you want these Pervects out of here?β
βEr,β Gubbeen thought about the question for a mo?ment, βa lot?β The others nodded their heads vigorously. That seemed to be the general consensus. They were will?ing to agree upon that concept.
βEnough to risk your life?β I inquired, pushing a little harder.
βUh,β Cashel gulped, βwell, now that you mention it, not really. It hasn't been so bad with them here now, you know ... new things to do, new industry getting started ...β
I interrupted him. βDo you want to end up in a bottle like Wensley?β
βNo!β the Wuhs protested. He began to back out, but there wasn't room in the crowded inn. βI mean, if it's not necessary, but they have their own opinions on how they want to deal with us, you know. Everybody has his or her own style, and who am I to condemn that, right?β
βWell, here's the good news,β I told them. βI need your help, and it won't be fatal or painful at all. How about that?β The Wuhses looked surprised. I had begun with the worst possible scenario, and dropped the level of threat un-
til it was under their threshold of panic. I did my best to keep from smiling as they discussed the matter between themselves, but I wasn't going to wait long for their an?swer. βWell?β
βI believe,β Gubbeen began, βthat the risk assessment is favorable to our continued comfort. All in favor of assist?ing Master Skeeve ... ?β
βYah. Ya-βa-βaaah. Yaaaah,β the others bleated in agree?ment.
βOpposed.β
They all looked at one another. That was the biggest reason I had not approached each Wuhs privately. In pub?lic, they had to hang together, or face peer pressure to ac?cede. I was right.
βSheep,β Tananda muttered.
I rubbed my hands together. βGood. Now, here's what I want you to do. One week from today ...β
I now had to undertake the most intense course of study in my life, more difficult even than when I was trying to learn Dragon Poker in a week. Montgomery lent me a small, un?used root cellar as my study, since we didn't want an inkling of what I was doing to circulate. The Wuhses were terrified of the Pervects, but they loved to talk among themselves. A secret which they crossed their hearts and hoped to die before telling was open knowledge before the next round of drinks was on the table. I watched it happen over and over again. Therefore, Gubbeen and the others were on a need-βto-βknow basis only, as far as the specific details of our upcoming attack were concerned.
It was easy for me to say I could break down the com?ponents of die anti-βmagik spell and figure out how it worked, but since it did dampen any magikal probe that I threw at it, it made it harder to figure out what made it tick. Zol offered me his assistance.
βWe can employ statistical analysis and field emissions to discover what sets it off,β the Kobold stated, setting up his computer at the far end of the table. We discovered that inside a certain range the stone prevented either his notebook or Bytina from operating in this dimension. Bunny kept her little PDA at a protective distance from the sample.
βWhat puzzles me is what our source told Tananda,β Zol reminded me. β 'It makes more of itself.' What can that mean?β
βI don't know.β I peered at the rock more closely. I had had plenty of time to study the walls during my incarcera?tion, but I had not seen the bricks reproducing. βMaybe we have to give it something to reproduce with.β
We tried soaking the stone in water, wine, oil, and sev?eral less savory fluids. We fed it sugar, plant food, even people food, but it continued to sit there. I went back to Klah for the grimoires Garkin had left me. Everything in his books was oriented toward channeling power, not get?ting rid of it.
βMaybe it's like yeast,β I suggested. We broke it up into little pieces. We mixed it with dirt, then gravel, then chunks of rock. We heated it in fire, cooled it in ice, added practically every ingredient I could think of. I surrounded it in a field of magikal energy, then let it dissipate. Nothing happened until we mixed the wall parts with sand. The chunks of rock started making a hissing noise. A lather be?gan to gather on top. I reached out a finger to touch it, but Zol yanked my hand back.
βDon't touch it!β he cautioned me. The sizzling noise got louder. βI believe it's working!β
βBut why sand?β I asked, watching as the foam covered the mass and enveloped it in a seething, heaving, glowing lump. Heat blasted outward from it, singeing our eyebrows. We retreated to
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