The Nurse by J. Corrigan (list of ebook readers txt) 📕

Samira: another poor woman’s dead child.

What Daniel and Abigail did to me and to that woman and her baby is unforgivable. Vile.

But I ask myself: are they any worse than the baser part of me?

59

Theo

20 May 2016

Theo is looking forward to finally seeing Rose again because although Alison Greenwood had given him the green light to visit, Rose had not, saying she needed more time. The past ten days have been excruciating. As he makes his way through prison security it hits him that this is the last time he’ll be sitting on the uncomfortable visits hall chairs, although he’ll be carrying on with the writing classes that are running until July.

He had a call from Don Whiting the previous day. Theo said he’d pop into Don’s office before seeing Rose. Now he knocks on the door, but there’s no answer.

A custody officer he recognises walks by. ‘Don’s off sick today, Mr Hazel,’ he says.

‘Ah.’ Over the officer’s shoulder he catches a glimpse of Cathy. He doesn’t think she’s seen him, as her head is bent forward and she’s looking at the floor, but she’s making her way in his direction.

‘Cathy, don’t you have somewhere you should be?’ the officer says as she approaches.

Cathy’s vacant but pretty face looks at neither Theo nor the officer as she speaks. ‘It’s still free association.’

The officer glances at his watch. ‘Indeed, but you shouldn’t be loitering in the corridors.’

‘I have something I want to give Mr Hazel.’

‘You know that’s not going to happen, Cathy,’ the officer says.

‘It’s my homework, my story. C’mon, I spent ages writing it, and he missed our last class.’

Indeed he did. Theo smiles at her.

‘I’d like to read it,’ he says to the officer.

‘One day, Cathy, you’ll be the cause of my disciplinary hearing.’

She gives her work to Theo.

‘Thanks, Cathy,’ he says. ‘I look forward to reading it, but it could have waited until our next class.’

She shrugs, turns and lopes down the corridor. Theo puts the A4 sheets into his rucksack.

‘Strange ’un,’ the officer says.

‘Good writer, though.’

The officer laughs, his large protruding belly moving in unison with the waves of sound.

Theo makes his way to the visits hall, and to Rose.

Theo has been dreading this moment since Hugo’s inebriated revelation, although he questions whether Hugo was as pissed as he thought at the time. There is so much about this situation that is tragic, and made more so by Marion’s involvement. Marion didn’t question too deeply the events at Bluefields on the day her daughter was taken there to have her baby, and neither did she question activities at the Mount Clinic, where she carried out cash-in-hand cleaning for Daniel Deane.

Marion – Rose’s own mother – as guilty as the Deanes.

He takes a deep breath and swallows. In the most immeasurable parts of his imagination, he can’t conceive Rose’s state of mind. But he knows how he felt on discovering the body of his only son.

Shock, guilt, horror, distress, anguish. Grief. Insufferable and never-ending grief.

He got it all so wrong with Elliot, only realizing his neglect when he untied the camping rope and Sophie’s scarf from the bedroom door handle and laid his dead son on the floor. He cannot get it wrong again with Rose. And he will not.

Rose watches every step he takes as he walks towards the table. The visitor room is strangely empty today, just him and Rose, and another pair on the other side of the room. He wonders if the director has had a hand in this. If he has, Theo is grateful. As Rose stands and takes a few steps towards him, he tries to ignore the warm sweat glazing his face. The officer on duty turns his head away, scrutinizing the other prisoner.

Rose is already a free woman.

She lifts her right hand. He takes hold of it. So soft, so warm, so yielding, but the fine vibrations of her muscles translate to his. He pulls her closer and holds her for a moment. They sit down.

‘I have no words.’

‘It’s okay to say nothing, Theo.’

‘You wanted me to find out about Marion.’ Somehow this feels like safer ground. Rose’s suspicion about her mother was the only reason she agreed to talk with him.

‘My mother’s been a shadow, a ghost on the edge of my dreams.’ She speaks so quietly he can hardly hear.

‘I’m so sorry you turned out to be right about her.’

She lifts her shoulders and tucks that beautiful hair behind her ears. ‘My mother was there the day at Bluefields when I went into labour. She knew something was amiss.’ Fatigue outlines every syllable. ‘But surely she couldn’t have known that Abe was my son… her grandchild?’

Theo’s suspicion is that Marion did know about Abe. She must have put it all together. Rose is still protecting her mother.

She carries on. ‘I buried someone else’s dead child, Theo. That poor woman. That poor baby. Alison Greenwood told me what happened. An immigrant woman from the Mount Clinic was waiting to go into labour with her already dead baby girl. Daniel paid her to be induced, so that he and Abigail could take my live baby boy and give me her dead child in his place. They gave me the opposite drug, a tocolytic, to delay my labour.’

As Rose speaks, there are no tears in her eyes. Like Theo with Elliot, she’s used them all up. ‘I should have known,’ she continues. ‘Alison told the woman what happened to her daughter. She’s been to Samira’s grave to pay her respects. I’ve arranged to meet her next week and we’ll go to the grave together. I called her. They let me call her.’

‘That’s good, Rose. A wonderful idea.’

She’s looking at him, searching his face. ‘A mother who has carried her child for nearly nine months should know whether a baby is hers.’ She tilts her head, finding his eyes.

‘Don’t do this to yourself, Rose.’

She plunges on. ‘If it hadn’t been for you, Theo, I’d never have found out.’