SICK HEART by Huss, JA (non fiction books to read .TXT) 📕

fantasizing about what I might be allowed to cook tomorrow when we celebrate the end of our first test on the Rock.

CHAPTER TWENTY - CORT

 

The last night of the boring, disgusting if-I-never-eat-this-again-I-won’t-miss-it rehydrated chicken and rice dinners is spent up on the top platform, as usual, but we eat all together tonight, instead of in small groups. The kids are sitting next to each other in a loose circle. Not talking or signing, of course. They want to, and they are so close now, they can taste it. But they are as disciplined as kids their age can be, so they feign patience.

They were told what to expect before they got here on the Rock. So there is a general excitement in the air, mixed in with their natural apprehension and nerves over the first test that will happen tomorrow.

One day. Twenty kids, ten tests.

Even Anya looks excited and I’m pretty sure she has no clue what’s coming.

Oh, she’s heard of the test. Maart and Rainer have been talking about it non-stop for the past four days. But she doesn’t know what it means, how it will play out, or what happens after. So her excitement is more about anticipation than expectations.

I watch her as I force myself to choke down dinner. I cannot wait until tomorrow night. We will have a feast. I want beef so bad, I almost moan just thinking about it. Rainer is standing next to me. We’re both leaning up against the mechanical room wall, while Maart keeps his distance and sits on the beam with Irina and Paulo, his two favorites.

We all know Paulo is gonna make it. He’s like a mini-Maart on the mat. And Irina is great. For a girl. But the chances of her fighting another girl in real life are almost zero. She might be the only thirteen-year-old girl in the program alive at the moment.

It’s going to be a boy. It could even be Paulo.

We hope not, but if it is, it’s out of our hands and we just have to deal.

Rainer elbows me. “Stop it, she’ll be fine.”

I ignore him. I’m not really that worried about Anya. She seems to like the training. And she did well today. But Jafari is a little kid. There is no chance Maart is going to pair her up with Jafari. She knows him too well and that’s rule number one. When you test, you need to be challenged.

Jafari is fucked too. Because he’s been training with a much bigger opponent this past month. And that means Maart will probably make him fight one of Rainer’s boys. Or maybe his girl Rasha.

But I’m not really worried about Jafari. He’s going to do fine.

It’s Anya. And it’s Maart.

He hates her. He hasn’t said it out loud, but I can tell. I know him. I don’t need words to hear his thoughts.

“Jesus Christ,” Rainer mutters. “Will you stop already? He’s going to be fair. You know he’ll be fair.”

I shoot Rainer a dubious look, then sign, You know who it is. Tell me.

He smiles, which means he does know, then shakes his head, which means he’s not gonna tell me.

Is it Budi? Please tell me it’s not Budi.

Budi is a scrappy little Indonesian boy who was born into a Muay Thai camp and started training at the age of two. We didn’t get him until he was five. Udulf isn’t usually inclined to let me in on his selection process, but he took me with him to purchase Budi. He was my pick from over eighty boys who were bred at that camp for the fights and he is worth far more than the seventy thousand dollars Udulf paid for him. He will earn out that seventy grand by the time he’s ten. He will make it to Ring of Fire. He might even earn his freedom, he is that good.

“It’s not Budi.”

I let out a relieved sigh. I know it will be one of Rainer’s kids. Someone better than Anya and someone older than Jafari. I doubt it will be Evard. Maart goes easy on Evard because he knows Evard is out of here when we leave the Rock. Evard doesn’t need to worry about fighting for his life. So Maart will pair Evard up with Raffie because Raffie sucks and there’s really no way that kid lives through his next real fight. He’s done.

So that leaves Rasha—our middle girl—or Oscar.

Anya and Jafari are in the same situation, I guess. It’s going to be Oscar for Anya. He’s better than Rasha. So he needs the challenge of Anya’s much bigger size to take him to the next level. Rasha will wash out with Raffie.

I let out another long breath and start feeling better about tomorrow.

Anya will do fine. It’s doubtful she will win, but who cares if Anya wins? She’s not a fighter. Udulf is going to take her home with him the minute Rock camp is over. He’ll probably be waiting at the village when we get there. And then… that will be that.

Easy come, easy go.

Hmm. I consider that for a moment. Because Anya didn’t actually come easy. I earned her—hell, I earned all of them, but she was the only one I was allowed to take with me when the fight was over. And that part was easy, so—

“For fuck’s sake,” Rainer growls. “Stop thinking so fucking loud. Maart is gonna do the right thing. He always does the right thing for the kids.”

That’s true. Maart take his responsibilities as ajarn seriously.

But Anya isn’t one of the kids. Anya, as far as he’s concerned, is a total distraction. And possibly even some kind of trap.

He’s suspicious like that. And he thinks that Udulf isn’t gonna let us go. He thinks Udulf will fuck us all over at the last minute.

I’m not inclined to agree.

I’ve known Udulf my whole life. He might, in fact, be my actual biological father. And even though he’s been tough on me, he’s mostly