Deep Water by Mark Ayre (best big ereader TXT) 📕

be okay. I'll save the life or lives and stop some bad people, and that'll remind me why I do what I do. I'll feel fulfilled. Content. Ready to return to my empty existence and do it all over again."

Alice waited, then leaned over and nudged Abbie's shoulder with her own.

"But?"

"But it's always bittersweet." Abbie looked back at the house, then across the road. "Here I am, and we stopped the bad guys, but what am I leaving behind? Louis and Kyle are safe but are they rejoicing? No, they're mourning the loss of a son and a brother, a teenager who had his whole life ahead of him. I saved you, which was the point, but what am I leaving behind for you when I piss off? A child thrown from a cliff, lucky to survive drowning. A child shot, a child abused. A second daughter killed in only a few weeks. The knowledge your husband was a cheat and your grandson his love child. The murder of your youngest daughter returned to the forefront of your mind. You don't only have to come to terms with the fact Angel killed her but also with Ollie's involvement. You went through the condition of everyone in that house but left him out. Fine. You don't have to discuss him with me. You do need to make a decision because you're all he's got. Question is, can you come to terms with the fact he attacked Ariana and called his mum rather than an ambulance?"

"I don't know," said Alice. "Should I even try? Does he deserve it?"

"Not for me to say," said Abbie. "I hope you find a way to forgive him, to help him, but I'm removed from the situation. I never met Aurora, but I did meet Ollie. I understand the damage Angel did. I want to see him get help.”

Alice considered, then nodded. “I’ve decided to blame Angel for what happened to Aurora and how Ollie turned out,” she said. “I don’t know how I’ll do, but I’ll try to treat Ollie as though he were my own. Try to fix the damage my daughter did during his upbringing, especially during the years I was in jail.”

This was brave, commendable, amazing. Abbie wanted to say all of those things or take Alice’s hand or something but found the words blocked.

In the end, she said, “I hope, for both your sakes, you can do it. I think it will be good for you both. Either way, I'll never know because I'm walking away, which brings us back to the crux of the problem."

"Which is?"

"I come to new places to save the lives of strangers, and usually I do. But what do I leave behind? Not happy families but broken homes. Lives left in tatters. How do I keep on with this vicious cycle when nothing ever seems to get better?"

Abbie expected Alice to mull that one over. She did not expect the older woman to laugh, but that's precisely what Alice did.

"This is funny?" Abbie asked.

"It is," said Alice. "I never get to talk about my great love, and you've given me reason to do so twice in one day. Thank you, Abagail."

Great love? Abbie considered Alice's children and her home and her sea view before it clicked.

"Spider-man?"

"That's the one."

"And he's relevant here because..."

Alice patted Abbie's leg. "Peter Parker has suffered some terrible tragedies in his life. Most notably, the deaths of his Uncle Ben and one of his love interests, Gwen Stacey. However, for the most part, and as with most superheroes, his stories have happy endings. He swoops in, fights the bad guy, struggles, ultimately overcomes them, and celebrates. Very rarely does anyone important get hurt, and the collateral damage isn't mentioned. That is fictional heroes. Do you see where I'm going with this?"

Abbie did. Not wanting to rob Alice of the effect of the end of her story, she chose not to answer.

"This isn't fiction," said Alice. "This is real life, and in real life, collateral damage matters. In real life, things are seldom squared away neatly and nicely."

Pause. Behind the house, they could hear the water lapping at the rocks. The cold seemed to deepen by a couple of degrees. Abbie shivered, but Alice did not.

"My youngest daughter died before you arrived. During your mission to keep me alive, Jacob died, though you promised Louis you'd keep him safe. I've already gone over everything that happened to my children. Horrible stuff."

"Thank you for reminding me about Jacob."

Alice waved this away. "But what if you hadn't been here? Jacob would still be dead, but so would Louis and Kyle. That monster you killed would still have raped my daughter, but so would a bunch of his friends. Angel would still be dead, but who else? Do you think Pedro would have stopped with her? Tony and I would never have escaped the balcony. It would have been a simple matter for Pedro to come and gun us down. When Ariana reemerged, he would have got her too."

“Good point,” said Abbie. “Then who would have visited your eldest in prison?”

Alice chuckled. “Well, quite. But you get my point. You're one of the good ones, truly, so you'll carry the pain of the lives you failed to save from this encounter, but you shouldn't. You should examine the situation on its merits and have the sense to realise how much worse things would be if you hadn't turned up. Abbie, you are an honest, true-life hero. I pray you remember that, even if only occasionally."

They took some time. During the silence, Alice took a card from her pocket on which she had scribbled a number. She tapped Abbie's phone.

"Call your contact. I know you want to get everything squared away; you've been waiting for my permission. Well, now you have it. So make your call, but before you do, I'm going to ask something else of you. Something I have no right to ask given everything you've already done."

Though she