Poetry, Advice, Quotes, Etc., Etc. by Rebecca K. (color ebook reader .txt) 📕

Can anybody hear me?
Or...
Am I talking to myself?

My mind is running empty,
In this search for something else.

Because it seems I've crossed the line again,
For being nothing more than who I am.

And...
I keep searching for something,
Something...
That I never seem to find.

Now...
Take a good look at me.
Do you still recognize me?
Am I so different inside?

And I tear my heart open.
But I sew my self shut.
My weakness...
Is that I care;
Too much...

And my scars remind me
That the past is real...

Because...
I've been to a place so cold.
It steals your soul.
It takes more than hope.
It takes its toll...

And...
I've been beat up and broken
Down.
I've been there a thousand
Times.

I may have walked
Through the worst in Hell
My friends.

And...
We all got our
Reasons why.
That's why...
I...
Was built
To last...

So...
Just give it one more try,
To a
Lullaby...

And...
When I lose my way,
And I forget my name,
Remind me
Who I am.

Because...
My insides are turned to
Ash...
So slow.
And the waves are
Collapsed...
So cold.

So...
Where'd you go?
Where's your home?
How'd you end up...
All alone?
Can you hear me,
Now?

And...
If today was your last day,
And tomorrow...
Was too late,
Could you say good bye...
To yesterday?

Because...
The secret side of me...
I'll never let you see.
I keep it caged...
But I can't control it.

I feel it...
Deep within.
It's just...
Beneath the skin.

I must confess...
I fell
Like a monster.

But...
This is the last night you'll
Spend alone.

Look me in the eyes,
So I know you know...
I'm everywhere
You want me to be.
Look me in the eys,
So I know you know...
I'm everything
You need me to be.

But...
That doesn't mean much.
It doesn't mean anything
At all...
Because the life I've left
Behind me...
Is a cold room.
Sweet surrender...
Is all I have to give.

But...
Listen to your heart,
When he's calling for you.

Because...
I am just another
Number...
Stack me up I'll
Crumble...
And
Drift along...

I made a wrong turn,
Once or twice.
Mistreated,
Misplaced,
Misunderstood...
Miss 'knowin' it's all good'...
It didn't slow me
Down...

Mistaken.
Always...
Second guessin'...
Underestimated
But look!
I'm
Still
Around!

Because...
What doesn't
Kill
You...
Makes you
Stronger...
Stand a little
Taller...
What doesn't
Kill
You...
Makes
A fighter...


Stanza 1-2: Astronaut, Simple Plan
Stanza 3: Bully, Shinedown
Stanza 4-5: Monster You Made Me, Pop Evil
Stanza 6-7: Scars, Papa Roach
Stanza 8-11: Built to Last, Redlight King
Stanza 9: Lullaby, Nickelback
Stanza 10: Remind Me Who I Am, Jason Gray
Stanza 11: Valentine's Day, Linkin Park
Stanza 12: Hear Me Now, Hollywood Undead
Stanza 13: If Today Was Your Last Day, Nickelback
Stanza 14-16: Monster, Skillet
Stanza 17-18: The Last Night, Skillet
Stanza 19: Sweet Surrender, Sarah McLachlan
Stanza 20: Listen to Your Heart, Kent Moran
Stanza 21-22: Drift, Emily Osment
Stanza 23-24: Perfect, P!NK
Stanza 25-26: Stronger, Kelly Clarkson


I feel lost.
I hide in a world of dark.
Nobody sees the truth,
I act happy,
I say I'm okay.
When on the inside I'm breaking apart
I remain silent
Nobody asks me to speak.
That's okay.
I don't really feel like talking anyways.
I look around and see so many things;
Happy people,
Groups of friends.
All of them so oblivious,
So oblivious to my feelings.
They ask me if I'm okay.
I say I'm fine.
And they accept that.
But it's not true.
I know it's not.
And then after they've asked,
And I've said that I'm okay,
They leave me alone and I ignore them.
This is because I don't want to face the truth.
I don't want to tell them that everyday I look.
I look for someone.
Someone to see past the lies.
Look past all the fake smiles.
I don't want to tell them that I wish.
That I wish for somebody who won't ask.
Just somebody to say that they'll be there.
But I know that this will never happen.
They don't want to deal with this stuff.
Never will.
Never have.
They just won't...
Darkness, Rebecca Kinnaman

I run and I hide.
I think and I cry.
To be recognized, I have to threat a manic ride.
They look at me like nothing's wrong.
This is because I try to be strong.
Even though it won't be long,
Before I completely lose it all.
I go and I lie.
An dI, I try.
But try as I might
I just can't find a light
That might help me with this fight.
Completely alone
I find a stone.
It's deep in my heart
And I feel like it's tearing me apart
Running away is starting to fray.
And as much as I would like,
I just can't find a way out of this plight.
And as I slowly come undone,
They don't even begin to ask
If I'm getting ready to run.
This, too, is slowly tearing me apart.
And I just can't help but think...
They're playing a part.
A part of my fucked up life...
Playing a Part, Rebecca Kinnaman

You look at me with sorrow in your eyes.
And all you ask is why.
Go look inside.
You might find an answer.
But until then, I don't want your pity.
And I don't want your sympathy.
All I want is for you to see.
One day you'll try to find me,
But I won't be there for you to find.
I will have left this bitter life behind.
You may want me, and you may cry.
But remember all the times you said
That you would be there for me.
And then you weren't.
All the times I needed you.
But you ignored me.
You don't look at me
Like I might have something to say.
You just ignore me.
You want me to speak.
And then when I do
You tell me to be silent.
I do not know what truth is anymore.
I do not know what is right.
What I do know, though, is that I am afraid.
I wish to not just be noticed.
I wish to be seen.
I do not wish to be heard.
I wish to be understood.
But I do not wish to hurt.
I only wish that you would see me hurting
I wish you could see what was lying behind my mask.
You only see my surface.
You see my happiness,
But not the fakeness.
You hear my laugh,
But not the force behind it.
You no longer dig.
You only mar the surface.
That's it.
I am left with more hurt and more scars.
You think I am okay.
You believe me when I say that I'm fine.
You believe me when I say that nothing's wrong.
When in my broken heart and weary mind,
There are so many thoughts.
I have so many emotions running rampant.
They are slowly getting out of control.
I don't know what to do with them.
I only know what they want and need.
But not why they are there or what they mean.
All I know is that I do not want them.
They only cause me hurt and discomfort.
I just want them to end.
That is all I wish for
Is that too much to ask for?
Or am I not lucky enough
For these memories to quit consuming me?
Death.
Pain.
Hurt.
Scars.
They overwhelm me like a tidal wave
I am swept over by them.
They take control and hold me
Until I am too hurt and paranoid to move.
That is all they serve me.
That is all they ever serve...
Hurt, Rebecca Kinnaman

You comfort me when I cry.
You catch me when I fall.
Even if I'm lost in the dark,
You are still there for me to call.
I don't have to pretend.
You let me be myself.
You laugh.
Even when I'm acting stupid.
And if I say something stupid,
You push it aside without question.
I know you're not perfect.
But that's okay;
Neither am I.
That's how it is.
I don't care what others say.
You tell me you feel useless,
I say I can always use you
To put a smile on my face.
You say you feel like a failure?
I tell you that you never fail
To make me laugh.
Even if you feel like everyone
Wants you dead,
Remember I am here.
I'll always the person to tell you:
"Everything is going to be okay."
I don't care if it's two in the morning.
If you need to talk,
Text me.
Call me.
Tell me.
I'll do my best to get you smiling again.
I get the biggest joy when,
Even if it's stupid,
You say you'll listen to my problems.
You don't tell me to suck it up.
You don't tell me to get over it.
And most of the time,
That's all I need.
You're one of the few people,
To just sit there and listen.
You don't judge.
You don't criticize me.
I thank you for that.
But most of all I thank you,