REMORSE by Taylor Pinderson (read a book txt) 📕

I sit in my strangely quiet,
Beaten up car.
Silent,
The passengers it held have long since left.
I am alone.

Silent.
Like the midnights of a frozen winter month.
And not even the radio wants to play,
For me.
My heart pains with remorse.

I look over at the passenger side.
The familiar dent of your body,
Once indented into the worn leather
Is now gone.
And I am alone.

When I come to a fork in the road,
I decide to go left or right,
Alone.
No backseat driver in my backseat.
And again my heart pains with remorse.
I fear I have pushed the eject button
one too many times.

I sit in the car I’m driving,
Watching my tiny clock
Tick
Tick
Ticking
As I bump down this moguled road,
Wishing I had taken the straight and narrow path.
And again my heart pains with remorse.

I’ too busy watching my time
Tick away,
Unfocused.
I miss my turn
and veer off a cliff.
Alone.
And nobody hears my scream
Or maybe,
Nobody cares

I’m falling
Falling
Falling
Alone as I spiral to the ground.
My tiny clock is ticking,
Louder, faster
In my ear

I stretch my arm out,
Reaching for the little dial
On the back of my clock
That resets the time.
It’s sitting there
Just out of reach.
Taunting me.

If I could take back time I would.
I would swallow the nasty words in my throat.
And tell you instead that I loved you.
And I know you would be here.
I wouldn’t be falling.
You would have seen the cliff.

But I didn’t and you’re not.
I’m still falling,
Still alone.
And my heart still pains with remorse.

I’m waiting.
Heart still hopeful I might land on that fluffy cloud
You waiting on it,
The words I forgive you
Lingering on your lips.

But I’m still falling,
And it’s not coming.
I guess I pushed away
One too many times.
And this time, you don’t want to come back.

Text: Taylor Pinderson
Images: Taylor Pinderson
Publication Date: 06-27-2012

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