Ranting Me by Lilly W. (the beach read txt) 📕

course. I really liked him He was there for the four years of high school and.......

I'll tell you later, that's a story for another time. I might even let you know what happened and how it ends. 

But I could go on and on. For the reasons that I like him. But it was the way he made me feel. Like there were butterflies in my belly. How I would think about him all the time. And the whole time, I didn't know how he felt. All my friends thought it was so cute. But like I said, I'm ugly, even my step mom thinks so

 

 

 

Life and Death 

 

Death is life

We live to die

And we die to live

We live to give life

Only to receive death

We die so more can live

It all starts with life

 

Depression and darkness

Happiness and light

Bright and Bold

Stale and cold

All there to be told

You have a soul

Even if it is like coal

Or if it is bold and not cold

Life is

Gloomy and Golden

Grand and Gray

Ghostly and Gutting

It is Great

 

Death is

Sour and sweet

Sorrow and smiley

Sucky and Saving

It is Sad

We have to learn it’s not all that bad

    
There are so many stories of death. Thats all you ever hear about. What about the life? That you were made to die for more people. We are all heroes. Not just the people that fought in the line of duty. No disrespect, my grandparents fought in that and it forever changer there lives. 

 

 

 

Sad 

 

Past is the past

Like putting on a cast

You can’t see what’s past the cast

When you look into the past

 

It’s a mess

Not like a game of chess

You have to stay on the base

Of sanity

 

I hate me

I don’t like what I see

I don’t know where to be

Maybe I can go die in the sea

That’s a good place to be

 

Hope is not the way to cope

Let it out not let it soak

Sorry to poke

But you look like you’ve lost hope

 

Me being sad really seems to make her mad

Not because she cares but it will make her look bad

Why can’t I be a little sad

That usually makes her glad

 

I can't take all of her glares and hidden glances. She hids them from my dad. And she is the onr thing that can bring me down, and keep me there. There are somethings that people can never overcome. 

 

Bye to the Sky 

 

I wish I could float to the sky

I don’t need to say bye

I just need to lie

And say that I’m fine

 

Put on the fake face

Keep a steady pace

So they don’t see the trace

So they don’t make a case

 

I’m worthless

I’m ugly and useless

I’m a waste of space

And all over the place

 

Could cry in the sky

Tears hitting the kite

Counting the clouds

Radiating to cries

 

Gone in the sky

Lost in the pines

Prepared for the bye

As I float to the sky

 

Life would be so much better if I lived in the sky. I wouldn't have to deal with anything else. No body else. 

 

 

 

Small Things

 

I had a crush. Every time I thought of him, I smiled. If I was in a bad mode. I would think of all the things that he can say to make me feel better. Of all the ways that he helped. I’m sure he didn’t know it.

And I really didn’t know if he liked me. And I’m sure you’ve heard this before. And all that. But this is me and I have to tell you. Okay, so in school I would only have two classes with him. And in one of them, he sat next to me for a while. And guess what?

We talked. And I really liked to talk to him. Then he would look me in the eye.

But, i looked away. WHAT?!?! WHY?!?!
Yeah, it’s stupid, but I was scared that I would give to much away and he would stop

talking to me. It helps that we have lockers next to each other. So I can talk to him a lot.  

We would do this thing. We would pat each other on the head. No we're not dogs or anything. And I’m not sure how it started. And that brings me to one of my favorite quotes.

I look back every day and see the small things that matter. That joined laugh. That small smile. It’s all the things that he probly doesn’t think about. All the things that matter. To tell you the truth. I sound like an old lady. I really do. Oh, make sur you live by the golden rule! Maybe your heart will be golden to.

Yeah, you liked the guy. Move on, so what. How does it end?

That is still for later.

Oh, some on!

You know, never mind, you were most likely getting bored anyway.

My Life of Quotes

 I want you to know something.

I LOVE QUOTES!!!

They are the best. And I understand them, most of the time. So this is a great opportunity to share with you my favorite quotes and what they mean to me.

And some of them are stupid friend and teen quotes. But that's what I grew up with. 

 

 

I held myself back for so many years. Just because I had stupid questions in my head for the longest time.

Why am I me?

What if I mess up?

Will anyone see?

What will they think?
I hit home on every one. They all applied to me. I was so scared of what other people would say or think, I would be stuck in thought. There were many people that were there to show me not to hold everything inside.

But that’s all we ever do, isn’t it?

 

 

 

 

 

 

This makes me think of science. Weird, all the way. 

 

 

I actually had a shirt for that.

Pathetic? Yup, all the way. But that was when I was going through a tough time, and my step mom got it.

I stopped wearing it the day I saw an old woman wearing the same thing. Funny thing is, she noticed to. I ran away before she could saw anything. The thing might as well be dead. Oh! Bad thing to say since that old woman could be to. But that was awhile ago. But it’s still dead to me.

 

 

 

Cheesy as a quesadilla? Yeah, I thought so to. 

But one of my teaches had this quote hanging on her wall. She was the guidance teacher. When ever someone had to go there for some reason, she would always refer to that quote.

Saying:

“You are special for who you are. Many people can take anything they want. They can rip out your heart. They can take way you sight. But they will never take your soul. That is you. It is how you think, how you feel, who you are. Now it’s about time to realize it.”

That was a weird quote at first. It only passed my mind as she passed. She had cancer. It made sense. It made me see the way that she did, and I accepted it all the way. Because she accepted everyone.

 

Plain Spaghetti

 Sorry to tell you this, but I have a very boring life.

If you haven't been able to tell. Well, now I do. I used to think that I had a interestingly weird past.

But right now reminds me of plain spaghetti. Not doing much and yet knowing that I could do better. And it’s gross. I’m not talking about the butter noodles, but plain all by itself. I can’t stand the stuff.

Okay, so like I was saying, I’m spaghetti. When I was younger, I still had my sause. My pizzas, at least that’s what I thought. Okay, so how about you tell me what you think. Okay, I’m going to read your mind right now.

Did you feel that weird tingling? I did, it’s called your imagination. 

Blam, my mind in your head!

Just kidding, I'm not crazy,yet. 

 

 

To start it out, I have to say something about my friends. I have know them for a long time now. Ever since 6th grade. But there was one that I knew a month or so before that. Her name is……

Uhh, let’s go with sky, because her eyes are amazingly blue.

So every summer there is the Vacation Bible School, VBS. And that was the first time I saw her. It was before school even started. And I was like an alien. She had the longest hair I have ever seen. It was blond, of course.

Anyway, we were in the bible study and her sister said that she was the oldest in the class.

You know, when I put it that way, is sounds stupid.

So thinking that she might be older, I hated her. I didn't even know what her name was. All I knew was that she might be older.

So on the last day of VBS, I talked to her. But I just wanted to know her name. And that’s what I asked her

And you know what I found out?

I was older, by two days!

That made my day, and the rest of the summer. But it was a surprise to see that she was in the same grade. Since we were both in 6th grade, we made it fun.

I still tease her about me being 2 days older. She denies that it even counts.

 

 

So like I said, I moved to the school in 6th grade. And on that first day of school, I was