Poetry of the Ages by Kaitlin Chenoa Humphries (the dot read aloud txt) 📕

field
the red and yellow roses
both stand tall and taller
wanting to show who they are
who they can be.

The roses
they have let themselves be free.


Unnerved

To the world
so harsh, so cruel
understand my mental attitude.

I am of one
one mind,
one body,
and two different images given by few.

I know your thoughts
are edgy and unkempt.
Thinking I am one of plenty
who’ll give in to your rant,
about what I am made,
and who you think me as.

But to tell the truth,
I don’t care.
I am my own,
and live to find happiness and truth.
I love all,
and hate few.

You can speak behind my back
for no matter what you say or do..
I am one boat
in a murderous storm
that rages and makes waves,
so rough and mean,
to destroy me.

But on this boat
is where I stay
never tipping or turning over
to give it satisfaction of defeat.

Never giving in...
and when the storm is done
it’s rampage faltered...
there I stand calm and serene
unbothered and unnerved.

Forever sailing onward
through cruel storms and unfaltering whirlpools
that wishes to draw me into
the depths of the sea
to pummel and destroy my very being.

But here I stand unmoving and firm
not in a boat,
but on land...
not sea that wishes to destroy me, but people
whose words do others harm.

But not to me.
These words don’t touch me
they are just droplets falling
touching but never harming
sinking into the ground
where they are sucked in
to be repeated when thought needed.

So speak harsh world
continue your cruel rattle
your banter of falseness
cause I’ll stand strong and never fall
from the words that sear.
Cause fear that you send in others
will not touch me here.


Void

I feel that pang form in my heart
told to love myself before I can love another.
I look in the mirror
reaching up to brush a finger over my face
my eyes they are not mine
not any longer.

Brown eyes filled with pain
shining always with the threat of tears
A frown,
not mine,
lay always on my face.

I see a girl of torment
pushed to the brink of her existence
thrown away because of insecurities
Insecurities bred by the ones
who had told her they loved her.

As I look upon this girl in the mirror
not able to believe she is me
the pain she has this could not be me
but I felt the tears start to fall
and the girl in the mirror followed suit.

Miserably I crumbled
and to a ball I curled
I was nothing more than a broken girl
and in this I heard the words of past echoing.

Was there no saving me from such darkness?
Was I stuck to feel short happiness
the be dragged back
slapped in the face
and abandoned like I was nothing.

I was a girl of pain and hurt
a girl only worth a short time of love
to be tossed aside the moment something better arrives.

Realizing such I fell into myself
the girl in the mirror exposed
my heart bleeding at my feet
torn from my chest
to never beat.

I was stuck in a void of pain
and never would I think
I could crawl out again.


Fate

Their love was intertwined
by the giving of the tides
there was no breaking
what could not be broken
when fate herself
has laid out the path.

They had many lives
to try and find each other
a lot of life
and a lot of death.

In the time of pharaohs
the two lovers were madly in love
where she thought she would spend eternity
he thought he would have her hand
in secret they had met
till her father, cruel ruler
stabbed him in the head.

She sobbed as he fell dying,
no longer did she have him to her
and so she died herself
unable to live on.

To another life fate brought them together again
lovers till the day they died
courting, laughing enjoying
till a murderous man came
and both were slaughtered lying hand in hand.

In every life it was the same
each dying by anothers hand
and nothing fate did seemed to keep them together
till finally
a life many years later
a life time of searching
a life time of pain
they finally met each other once again.

Though in this life was impending doom
their love was set
they would finally gather more than moments
a family
a life
till death finally comes for him.

But fates course had finally finished
the love that they had struggled for
finally was met
and the man he died in peace
not to be reborn
but to wait for his lover
in eternity.


If You Were in Love

If you were in love
Would your stomach flutter,
The butterflies woken from slumber by embrace?
Would your heart skip a beat from their kiss,
Then constrict in pain from the loss of their arms around you?
Would they invade your dreams
Be the knight on the majestic white horse,
Battling dragons and ogres to protect you;
Or the princess
whom you've come to rescue?
Would he make you smile just by being in their presence
or seeing their face?
Would they make you want to cry every time they leave?

If you were in love,
would you cherish every moment you had?
Never blink an eye for fear to lose it?
Would you tell them you love them every day
and hold them every chance you get?

If you were in love,
Would you regret it while standing over your lovers death bed?
Would you curse the day they first made you laugh?
Would you hate them for that first kiss;
For that first embrace?
Or would you thank them for giving you a chance to know true love?
If you were in love...


The Facade

Do you really see this person standing before you?
Can you really see me as me?
What is it you must be thinking
to see this girl
speaking so clearly before you?

You must think I'm confident
brave and even strong willed.
But that is a facade I present
a wall built to hide the true me.

Why do I hide behind my walls?
The same reason I keep this bit of hair infront of one eye
the same reason some of you wear hats
or refuse to talk or express
to hide my insecurities.

I have many more than some would think
most people have had hardships in their past
then there are those
who has experianced and seen more than anyone
there are those whose past
is something they do not speak easily about.

Am I one of those?
Or am I one who just understands?
That is something very few figure out.
I stand before you
not as the girl who you see
but as the girl behind that wall
who is trying to express
trying to get people to see
to understand.

I do not trust those around me easily
though you may think I do,
I do not like attention
and I do not enjoy being loud.
But this is my facade
the fake me who is hiding the real me.

The true me is a little girl
who still dreams
who is afraid of the world
afraid of herself.
The true me is over emotional
the true me will grow horribly attached
if you can obtain my complete trust
the true me would die for a stranger
the true me would cry for another persons lost
someone I don't know
but someone i understand.

The person you see before you
speaking so clearly
expressing so easily
this is not me
this is not who I am
but this is who I show
because it is the only way to survive this world.

I've learned that shyness
quietness and timidness
only get you hurt.
You get mutilated from words
from expressions and thoughts.
Those who find you weak will feed on it and tear you apart.


Motherhood

I was asked
how can you see yourself
as a mother at so young an age.

I get chastised
told I am too young
told I do not know what I want
that I am a child
just starting to reach her adulthood
that I am one who still has yet to know
what she wants in life.

But is it truly a matter of age
that decides wether or not
you truly know what path you want?
Can you really be too young
to see right where you belong?

I may be young
You may think me naive
but I can look at the mothers
the grandmothers
and the people in the city around me
with the screaming children
who are tossing toys off of shelves
who are spanked or slapped in the middle of a store
and see what it is the parent is doing wrong.

People often wonder
how it is those who are younger
can sometimes be amazing parents
almost as great as those who are older
those who have more than 60 years under their belt.

What is it about some of us
who are supposed to be naive
who are supposed to do nothing but party
drink and make mistakes
who instead decide to take a course
for a future we see so clearly
that people seem to think of nothing but children still.

I find myself wishing
rather than school
that I was home
with a round belly
so far to term
that I could feel the baby kicking.

I find myself in a dream
of little feet running across wood floors
toys scattered
food in places you wouldn't imagine.

I can see myself in the arms of a man
who just pours love into me from a simple look
from a simple touch.

But this is what people only think of as a dream
something people say I am too young for
that I have a life to live
things to see
time to experiment.

But I do not find myself wanting a life of parties
no
I can not only care for myself
not when it is our jobs
to raise the future of our lives
not when you see how fragile life is
and i wanna begin these steps towards happiness.
This is me
my want to be a mother
my first step into motherhood.


Bird Without Purpose

I let you use me
I let you abuse me
I let my mind wander
I let it fracture, and my hopes fall to pieces.

My future became dreams that I could never reach
dreams that you worked so hard to lock away.
I stood before you
expressing these thoughts out
telling you my future
wanting to write
wanting to smile
but you tore them apart
told me they weren't worth while.

I allowed you to chain me down
beat my dreams from my mind
till you turned them from dreams to nightmares
to things that I wasn't allowed
things that could hurt me, that could kill me.

I was a bird without purpose, without life
my wings were clipped
I was confined by the cage you locked me in.
I became your doll, your toy
Molded to your wants and needs
my mind was not my own
I kept silent let you run my life
till this useless bird began to die.

I