The Trouble With Never. by M. C. Lyden (if you liked this book TXT) 📕

I looked up from my new novel as the street lamps flickered. That's when I saw him standing there.

Leaning against the lamp post looking straight at me, was an angel.

Literally. For one moment, I thought I'd died and gone to heaven. No one should be that physically flawless.

He was tall, with short dirty blond hair, wearing light blue jeans, a fitted black t-shirt, and a dazzling smile once he caught me looking back. Not to mention, he had the most amazing peircing blue eyes.  Completely mesmerized, I smiled back.

"You know, it isn't safe for a girl to be out alone at this time of night", he said as he started walking towards me.

"True. But then again, most girls have nothing on me."

I turned my eyes back to my book, keeping him in my peripheral vision the entire time. I don't trust guys, particularly hot ones. They seem to all have an agenda...  

"Are you alright?"

Damn, he's got a really sexy voice. Ughhhhhhhh.

 I looked up to see him standing next to my bench. My heart started thumping loud and fast in my chest. I must have been too lost in thought to notice his approach. Until I realized the reason I hadn't heard him approach was because he hadn't made a sound. I mentally slapped myself for being so careless and thought a way to nonchalantly leave. I smiled at him.

"Oh yeah, I'm fine. I just realized i'm late to pick up my brother." I lied unhesitantly.

I grabbed my purse, hastily stuffed by book inside, and started walking away.

Then I heard footsteps catching up to me.

Oh nooooo!

"Hey, hold up! I didn't mean to chase you away."

I turned back to look at him. He stopped walking towards me and smiled.

"I was just going to ask you what you were reading."

I debated walking away again but decided not to. He seemed nice, and not in an overly interested and creepy kind of way.

I looked at him and let a small smile through, I could talk about books all day long.

"I'm currently reading The Last Battle of the Icemark, it's the last in it's series. I wasn't sure if I would like them but I haven't been able to put it down. They have a little bit of everything, Humor, Romance, Action, a fantastic plot. Have you read them?"

"No, you just seemed to be really enjoying it… and it was an excuse to approach you."

He looked so sheepish as he admitted this, that I couldn't help but laugh. He seemed so confident and sure of himself that I wouldn't have thought someone like him could be nervous. I wouldn't have thought anyone so beautiful would feel the need to be nervous.

"Thanks for being honest. I'm sorry I…well…tried to ditch you..."

Now it was my turn to look sheepish. 

 "Are you kidding? I would have thought you strange if you hadn't tried to leave when some random guy walked up to you at night. That reaction is actually quite normal."

He had no idea how much I needed to hear that. Even though it's not true. To be normal was all I wanted sometimes. I'm different. I'm different and no can ever know.

I realised I wasn't normal on my 15th birthday. The day my parents... died. My brother, Peter, and I have been on our own ever since. He had just turned 18 a few months before that day. We were all each other had.  He told me I was different, like him, not that I hadn't figured that out though. Peter was away at college when Mom and Dad were killed. He wasn't there to explain what was happening to me. He wasn't there.. to stop it all from happening.

~ Two Years Ago ~

"WHY should anyone have to read this book?! it doesn't make any sense!"  

Pacing around my purple and grey bedroom, i thought up every excuse I could possibly use to get out of reading A Tale of Two Cities by Charlse Dickens. I came up with a grand total of zero excuses. I lauched myself onto my bed with a huff of frustration. I closed my eyes for what seemed like a minute until my phone rang. I slowly picked myself up off the bed and made myself walk over to the desk where I had left it.

"Hello?"

I waited for the person on the other end to acknowledge me.  

"Hello, is this Kelly Sullivan?"

"Yes, this is she."

"Are you of any relation to a Micheal and Stacy Sullivan?"

I couldn't help but wonder what lady was getting at.  

Should I hang up on her?

"Yes, I'm their daughter. Why?"

"I'm sorry. Your parents were involved in a mugging earlier today. They are in critical condition."

No. Not Mom and Dad. They're fine, they have to be...

~

"Hello-o? Coming back to earth anytime soon?"

My eyes turned back to the man in slowly.

"I'm sorry, but i really need to get back."

 I turned on my heel and started walking away, for the second time that night.

"Hey!"

I could hear the beautiful man trying to get my attention, but I kept walking.

Mom. Dad. Thank you... You guys always know when I'm getting too close to the edge.

 I quickly ran through the events of my life since my parents passed. It always reminded me that relationships never ended well, especially with the opposite sex. That reminder was always the only thing I needed to slam on the brakes.

I walked around aimlessly for a minute, making sure i wasn't being followed, then started home. The apartment complex came into view and I immidiately knew I was in trouble. Not REAL trouble, just the kind of bullshit you get from your over-protective older brother when he finds out you snuck out at night.

He was watching my approach through a window. I looked up at him, knowing I could rile him up even from so far away. I smirked and waved enthusiastically. I laughed as I watched Peter stomp out of my field of vision.

He is soo predictable!

 With a grin plastered on my face, I jogged up the three flights of stairs to our apartment and opened the door. I stepped inside and scanned the kitchen and living room for my brother.

Our apartment wasn't huge. It was a two bedroom, complete with a fair sized bathroom my brother and I shared. Peter's job at the hospital afforded us a few luxeries, such as the flat screen TV in the living room, my extensive book collection, and a steady supply of hot water. Other than that, Peter claimed that his wages would be put to better use elsewhere. I still hadn't found out exactly where the rest was going, but I knew it was only a matter of time before I figured it out.

When I saw that Peter wasn't waiting on the sofa pretending to watch TV, like he usually would when he was going to rip into me for bad behavior, I shut the front door and cautiously walked to his bedroom door. I knocked hesitantly. 

"Come in" 

I winced inwardly at the poorly veiled venom in Peter's voice.  I opened the door, gazing into the dark room, and finally made out Peter leaning against the wall, staring out of the only window in the room.  

"So, should I turn the light on or something? Don't tell me you're trying out the vampire lifestyle. I've heard that the diet kinda sucks." 

I felt my confidence shrivel as Peter turned away from the window to give me freezing cold stare.

Oh come on, that was a good one!

"Laugh it up, Kelly Anne.  Something tells me that you won't find everything so amusing when you need my help getting rid of a body. You know that's where you'll find yourself if you keep this up."

"Peter, relax! I was only gone for an hour, and I stayed close to home. I just- I just needed some time to myself." I tried to look as confident as sounded, but even I  knew that my decision had been rash.

Peter just grunted angerly and turned back to the window. We stood in silence for a moment before he turned back and started slowly crossing the room toward me.

"Why do you insist on making my life difficult? Ever since The Accident you haven't listened to a word I've said. All you do is rush headlong into situations that could ruin people's lives! Stop thinking about yourself and start thinking about the damage you could do to other people if you aren't carefull!" 

His words made me cringe. He was right. It was selfish of me to put my own wishes ahead of te welfare of all those innocent people. One misguided touch and a life could end. 

 ~ Two Days After The Accident ~

I stood on the sidewalk, watching as the taxi pulled up along the curb by our house. Normally, I would be completely ecstatic that Peter was finally back from college. This time, though, I dreaded seeing his face. I knew what expressions I would find there. I knew that seeing Peter would carve the past days in stone. There would be no more hope of denial. No more waking up and hoping that it had all been a dream. I knew, that when I looked at Peter, his eyes would be mirroring the anguish in my own.  I stared at the cracks in the sidewalk as I started fidgiting anxiously with the strings on my hoody.  My ears were straining to hear the muffled conversation from inside the car.  I felt a small prick of annoyance that he was taking so long.

I mean, really? How long does it take to pay a cab driver?

I heard the cab door open and then close. I glanced up.  Looking at Peter, I suddenly started to cry.  I tried to hold them back, but the more I tried, the more desperate the tears were to escape.  I covered my face with my hands and turned around, about to bolt for my room. Suddenly I felt Peter's arms around me, wrapping me up in a ferocious hug.

"Hey now, there's no need for that Kells. I mean I know you missed me, but aren't the waterworks a bit much? I would have settled for a nice welcome home buffet or something. The airport places were ridiculously expensive. Not to mention, they lacked a certain appeal.  Though, it may have been the scruffy employees that attributed that... But point being, I'm completely starved."

I glanced up sharply at him. 

Is he really thinking about his stomach right now? Seriously? So typical.

One glance at his face and I realized. He was trying to make me feel better. I could see it plainly. He had on that  super annoying smirk, but it didn't reach his eyes. Peter was being strong so I wouldn't have to. He was concealing it well, but he was heartbroken, just like me. 

 ~Present~

   Simply remembering that day sent an overwhelming sense of guilt shooting through me.  Peter has given up so much for me.  He's always been worrying about me, trying to fix every mistake that I make. The least I can do is follow the rules he sets. Even more so, because I know that he's right. 

I stared