Life as We Knew It by M. Erin (good book recommendations .TXT) 📕

"And do you have your CVS card on you today?"
"Why yes I do, thank you for asking."
(Beep)
That's all I hear all day. The noise of the scanner picking up bar codes. I guess this is normal now. Work. School. Sleep's out of the question. My social life tends to vary from time to time, depending on how much I can remember.
"Your total is $10.69."
"Okay. How do I do credit? Cancel?"
"Yes ma'am."
I feel my phone vibrate in my pocket. Probably because the battery is about to run out. I have no idea why I carry it. It's not like I can text at work. There's too many cameras.
"Alright. Here's your receipt. Have a wonderful day."
"Thank you doll face. Enjoy this beautiful weather."
Not likely. I'm closing tonight and that means no sun.
"Hi can I help you?"
"A pack of Camel Menthol Silvers. The ones with the 75 cents off."
My day keeps going on like this. It seems like days but in reality its only been 2 hours. Believe it or not, this is me doing better. At least I'm talking to people. I've moved on from it. I'm happy. Fuck whatever everyone else says.
"Hey, Charlie. You want to go on your break?"
I look up to see my manager staring at me. She keeps looking at me.
"Sure," I reply after realizing I was supposed to answer her.
My breaks are usually spent in my car no matter how hot or cold it is. I'd rater listen to music away from other's ears. What I listen to is personal to me. I don't need people to comment on it. And plus I can lay down for 30 minutes in my comfy cute car. My car's the only thing in this world that hold value anymore.
Remembering that my phone's battery was dying, I pull it out to charge it. There's new email sign on screen. It's from Brad. "Charlie. He needs you bad." Underneath the message was a link to the local news station. Opening the link I quickly read it. A tear runs down my cheek.
Fastening my seat belt I drive to the grocery store. Comfort food can fix a soul when its shattered. And right now Todd need comfort food more then anyone else. Publix will forever have my business mainly because they have these awesome recipe card in the front door which is great when you need to make something quick. I don't think my brain can really come up with anything original. Usually I walk around and buy foods that feel like they need to be cooked. Yes,its weird but I've wanted to be a chef since I was 9 years old. Take it from a girl who watched Food Network instead of MTV growing up, food that is inspired by window shopping tastes better then the planned out ones. But right now I don't have time. I have to be back at work in 20 minutes. Speed shopping it is. Not to say that I won't put my own little twist in the note card recipes. Fish sounds good. But there's steak and chicken too. Pasta will hit the spot. I decide to look at the poultry section to see what looks fresh and just go with that. Picking up all the essentials, veggies, spices, flour, and fish, I check out.
(Beep)
There's that sound again. It’s like there's no escaping it. Kind of like how there's no escaping the memories of him and it.
"Hey are you ready to check out?"
Snapping back to the present, I load the belt with all my items. A quick glance at my phone tells me I have 5 minutes before I'm due back at work. Thank goodness the store is close by.
Grabbing the fish out of the car, I hurry back into work. Can't leave the fish in the car. It would spoil so I put it in the break room's refrigerator.
Now I just need to wait until I get off work to go see him, my past. The tears ended a long time ago. I've moved on. My best friend needs me, and memories won't keep me away from him.

Standing in front to apartment B12, my knees start to buckle. I haven't seen Todd in three years. I grew up with this man. He climbed trees with me, watched me catch my first fish, bought me chocolate when my cramps made it too hard to move. Todd. My best friend. Hell, at one point, my only friend.
And I had disappeared on him. I didn't call, text, Skype with him. No pigon mail was sent between us. Todd was there for a lot of my first. Even my first love. And my first funeral.
Taking the fact that Todd always sent me a birthday card to my mom's place as a good sign that he didn't absolutely hate me, I got the balls to ring the doorbell.
"Ding Dong the guests are here. Ding Dong the guests are hereeee."
Despite my terror, I chuckled. Only Todd and Brad would have a song singing doorbell. Two seconds later the door opened. Brad came out wearing a skin tight gray v neck and some basketball shorts. With his chocolate colored hair, his ocean blue eyes, and mile high cheek bones, he would look like a million dollars in a potato sac. Trust me. I've seen it.
The air was filled with stiff discomfort and awkwardness. I felt panic bubbling in my chest.
"You came."
"Long time, no see."
That's all it took. Brad hugged me so tight that I thought I was going to pass out.
"I still love you baby girl. I still love you."
"I love you too teddy bear. More than you know."
Slowly we stopped clinging onto each other. I gave him a small smile. He grinned at me. Picking up a strand of hair he gave me a questioning look.
"Pink and Blue. Really?"
"Plue."
Laughing he swept me up into another bone crushing hug. This time when we parted I saw a tear fall from the corner of his eye. I kissed it away.
"I'm not going to ask how he is because I know the answer already, but will you get some groceries out of the car for me?"
"You’re cooking for us?!?!"
"You bet you fine butt, teddy bear"
He did a fist pump and grabbed my keys.
"Hold on. Which car is yours?"
"The yellow buggy."
"Only you Charlie. Only you." He turns away, shaking his head.
I take a deep breath and charge into the apartment while I still had the gut to. The smell of cheap tequila hit me. The type that you buy to when you want to get hammered really quick . The apartment looked like a bachelor pad. But then again, that's exactly what it was. It was perfect. Big screen plasma. Gaming systems sprawled out all over the living room floor. Shoes by the door. Surround sound. The walls were probably sound proof. I was in love. Mind you, I was raised like a lady by my mother. But corrupted by my friends, who all just happened to be of the xy chromosome.
The sound of plastic rustling jerked me out of my inspection. Brad had come back with all the groceries. Kissing my forehead, he leads the way into the kitchen.
Todd.
And a bottle of tequila.
And what seems to be an overused shot glass.
Beer bottles littered the counters and floors. Alcohol was spilled in puddles all over the island in the middle of the kitchen. And Todd. He looked so deflated and spirit lost. I've only ever seen him like this one other time. When Jason had died.
He looks up at me. Despite his blood shot eyes, lined with dark bags, and his tired skin, the man was still beautiful. My nickname for him has always been Superman or SM because he looks like a better version of the hero. With dirty blond hair and his icy blue eyes, he looked good enough to eat. Something’s never change.
Before I know what's happening, I find myself pinned to the refrigerator with Todd standing over me.
"Leave," he commands.
I start to push past his arm to do just that. He pins me back into place.
"Brad, get the fuck out."
I realize that he's not talking to me, but to Brad instead. Brad looks like he's deciding between saving my sorry ass and feeding me to the wolves. Or in this case Todd.
"You want me to tell Marcy what you did when we were 16 at Jones' party."
And just like that I was thrown to the wolves aka Todd.
Brad shoots me a glance as if to say sorry.
"Don't fucking come back until I tell you to."
"Man, I know you got emotions running thru you like blood, but don't you dare hurt Charlie. We both love her too damn much to lose her again. You pull one fucking plue hair out of her half Indian head, and I cut you into pieces, bro."
I saw the tension up a level in the room. Before either one of the boys (not men mind you) could react, I intervened.
"Todd, baby I'll be okay. I'll text you after so you can have some dinner. I wanna hear all about this Marcy chick."
Giving me one last look, he grabs my keys and starts towards the door.
"Why are you taking my keys?"
"Because now you have to text me. You can't just disappear. And plus I need you to go ring shopping with me this weekend."
With that he left. I stood there, pinned to the fridge, gapping after him.
Ring shopping? The fuck? Marriage? When the hell did things get this advanced? And where the hell had I been?
"Where the hell have you been?"
Funny. We still have the same thoughts. Me and Todd. Todd and I. Best friends forever.
I look up into his eyes. Pain, fury, anger, violence were all present. But all of those emotions were shadowed with love. Without saying anything, I slip my hands around his waist, took that half step that separated us to his chest, and lay my head on his right breastbone. It felt like home.