Less than Perfect by S. J. Evans (love letters to the dead txt) 📕

believable than? How could he believe your lies? I’m not going to back down, I’m going to find him and you can’t stop it.” She said. Her voice was raspy from a sudden wave of anger and sorrow.
“Princess, he was just like anyone else: easy to fool. And if you really want to find him, go ahead and find him. You’ll only put yourself into a lot more pain by doing it, but I’m not going to stop you.”
“You’re sick,” she muttered. Her fists clenched on either side. “Do you honestly think you can keep on fooling everyone, Johnny? Someone is going to figure out the game you’re playing whether I tell anyone or not. You can’t hide everything forever.”
“Oh but I believe that I can. You see, as long as you don’t say anything, I’ll have what I want and need to get people to believe me. And even if you do spread the word to people, you and I both know that I can be a much more of believable figure than you. I mean, considering your… cutter of a reputation which you have so conveniently upheld for me.” He reminded her. His voice filled with a sheer coating of mockery and laughter to it.
She felt nauseous talking about it; knowing that he was right—who could really believe her after all of the lies she and Johnny have told trying to keep the secrets secret? “Please Johnny, I can’t keep lying to Leah like I have been. There has to be something you can do to convince her that everything that has happened was my fault—or something. I just need her to know something that’s not lies.” She pleaded, her desperation controlling every feeling she should have lived by. Her emotions were still running wild from the confusion and worry.
“I’m sorry Princess, but I can’t do that,” he finished. A sound like the shuffling of his footsteps came from the other side of the door, telling her that he was done with that conversation.
She spun around and slapped her hands against the door, crying out. “Wait!”
There was a halt in his footsteps encouraging her to go on.
“What did you do to me yesterday? The drug—it…hurt.”
“I just gave you something to give you a better sleep. It was obvious that you needed sleep; you were acting a little freakish and squeamish—both things you don’t need to act. I’m sorry that you didn’t take to it well, but I have a job to do now.”
She couldn’t help not believing him. She knew that she had every right to act the way she had; his violation had gone too far. “What are you doing?” She asked, pressing her ear against the door.
“Just as I said: I’m going to work, Princess. We will meet again tonight. Goodbye, Skylar.” He answered. And after he said it she knew that it was true—and that terrified her. She didn’t want to “meet” with him again; she wanted to be carried away from him. She has never been or felt safe around him.
He was leaving for a good enough amount of time that she could get out of the house and finally feel free again. She could be with Jules—the only person that kept appearing in her mind, over and over again, besides Johnny. She didn’t want to think about Johnny though; he was out of the picture for the day. Leah would be home soon enough too.
Wrapping her arms securely around herself, she walked out of the bathroom cautiously, being sure to check if he was anywhere to be seen. Finding a small glimmer of hope, she sighed and walked down the staircase. She hurried out of the house after grabbing her purse from the closet and ran down the streets.
Phone in hand she called Jules to see what the deal was with the beach, discovering that he was ready to give her a ride at any time. They ended the call as she told him where she was and that she would need the ride. She was sitting under the tree in the park, thinking about all of the things she still didn’t know about Johnny or her father. She would still find Derik and that was what she knew had to happen. She needed that, whether it surfaced as closure or an actual chance at a relationship with him.
“Hey,” Jules’ voice sang from above her head.
She looked up and smiled, instantly taken away from all of the worry and troubling thoughts. “Hey, Jules.”
“Are you ready to go?” He asked, grinning down at her.
Hesitantly she nodded her head and smiled a little bit bigger. “I am.”
He held out his hand for her and laughed, “Come on then, we’ve got to get there before Rachel and Vic.”
Rachel

and Victor

; the two names she didn’t want to hear together like that, ever

. “Victor is really going to be there?” She questioned, feeling a pang of uncomfortable weariness.
“Of course he is. Do you not want him to be?”
“Jules, he told me to stay away from you; I doubt he will be happy seeing me again.” She reminded him. Her voice was quiet and careful but also begging him for an answer.
“I talked to him about us and he’s going to forget about it, okay? We’re going to be okay, Skye. I want you to be happy and that’s all that matters. No one can tear us away from each other.” He smiled, the words graciously flowing from his soft lips.
Us

, the word she had wanted to relate perfectly for them since the day she first met him. She knew that she loved him, her feelings were too strong and oppressing to be hidden, but she also knew that she had been clinging to him because of Bryan and Johnny; she needed to see Jules for Jules—no one else. “Thank you,” was all she could say to that.
He pulled her into him and embraced her, the hug so gentle and careful that Skye thought it was too good to be true. She couldn’t kiss him yet though; she knew that it would only bring up Johnny’s lips against hers in a painful way—the torment of such a small gesture.
“Come on,” he said as he led her back to his car, his arm around her waist as she leaned her head into him.

Truth

Waiting for the arrival of their friends, Jules and Skye walked down the pier. They shared silence between one another, neither bothering to talk to each other as they walked. Skye hated how strangely she felt. It was as if being around Jules, back in his safe company, was still not enough for her. In fact, she felt even more on edge around him. She knew that he was her safety net; but how long could she really stay away from Johnny? He had changed her in the past few days, and in no way was it for her own benefit.
Something made Jules stop beside her, his head tilting to the side as he examined her face. “Is something wrong, trouble? You’re not acting like yourself.”
She looked at him then, her gaze meeting his. “Something’s very wrong,” she muttered before thinking. She watched him carefully, wondering what he would do if she kissed him, and frowned when she thought of rough lips against hers—not Jules’s

. She hoped he hadn’t heard her.
“What’s going on with you? I mean, you’ve been acting strange the entire time I’ve known you. And I can tell that something has been bothering you and troubling you. Did someone hurt you, Skye?”
She flinched away, shaking her head. “No—no one hurt me Jules,” she lied. Her tone was sharp and scratchy, guilt ridden, but she hoped he wouldn’t notice. She needed him to believe her lie—again.
“You’re lying,” he said quietly. His eyes dared her to tell him the truth, to open up and finally get some help, but she knew she couldn’t speak of the truth if she wanted to stay safe from Johnny’s wrath. His threats were an example of what he’d do.
“Excuse me?” she gasped, faking offence.
“I can tell you’re not being completely honest with me, Skye. The way you’re looking at me right now…it shows it all. You’re lying; someone hurt you, didn’t they?” He looked sincerely worried for her, like there wasn’t an amount of doubt in his mind that she really was lying to him, and it pained him.
“Please not now, Jules. They’re going to be here soon,” she told him, hesitating before averting her gaze and starting her walk back to the shore.
A hand reached out and stopped her, gently holding her in her tracks.
“Look,” he spoke quietly, his words a calming melody in her ears. “I didn’t mean to upset you. If you want to talk about it later, than that’s okay. All I want is to see you clearly; I don’t want to lose you, Skye.”
“I’m not upset,” she breathed. Her eyes lingered as she locked her gaze with his caring eyes, taking in the clean kindness about him. “I’d just rather not talk about it. I may lose you.” She lowered her eyes, her long eyelashes hovering downward. She couldn’t look at him, the face that looked distraught enough to make her cry.
She could see it now—she really was falling apart.
He sighed. Wrapping a strand of her hair around his finger, he stepped in closer and caressed her cheek. “You’re never going to lose me, Skye. I’ll be here—with you—as long as you want.” There was such a deep sympathy that sang out through his words, transforming them into something beautiful.
She looked at him then, her crystal eyes peering into his soul. She was tempted to look away, afraid of how he would see her; she wondered if he would see right through every façade and mask she hid behind—the only things keeping her alive.
But in that moment, while they were only inches apart and divided by that tiny distance longing to be closed, she longed to touch him or feel his lips brushing against hers. It didn’t matter that Johnny had been the last to touch them anymore; she only wanted to feel the security of something beautiful again.
In his eyes, she could see the same desires, passions.