Ugly Duckling: No One Wants Me by Hlengiwe Mathebula (best manga ereader TXT) 📕

“Oh sorry about that” I tell Njabulo. “No it’s okay” he replies. “What do you want to know about me and why?” I ask.

“Well I like you, I want to know the little things for now” he tells me. “Well you can ask me anything” I tell him.

“Okay full names, age, favourite colour, siblings, favourite song and artists stuff like that” he replies.

Hmm these questions may sound stupid but except for Bobo no one has ever shown interest in me even asking my favourite colour.

“Hmm I’m Mbal’enhle Nxumalo Zwide ka Langa uMkhatshwa (clan name), I’m 24 years old, currently doing my Masters in Journalism, I love writing.  I have 2 big sisters Nonjabulo and Nobuhle, uhm my favourite song is stubborn by Keisha Cole, my favourite colours are blue and grey. I love reading and writing, I’m a free lance content writer. I like staying indoors by myself no offence. Yeah I can’t think of anything else, your turn” I tell him.

“Hmm I’m Njabulo Jet Madondo Mnquhe wase maQhudeni uMwelase (his clan names), I’m 26, I work for Fidelity a security company I am their receptionist been working there for 8 years now. I have 6 older siblings 2 brothers and 4 sisters. My favourite song is smash by Ltido, my favourite colour is black. I like going out and reading I’m currently reading When Hope Whispers by Zoleka Mandela I’m reading for the 10th times.” He tells me this goes on for like 2 hours, it’s time for him to leave and I don’t want him to, but he has to go home he lives in Pretoria, I offer to drive him he says no. We plan to go out again the following weekend.

For the past three months Njabulo and I have been spending our free time together. He took me out a lot, and people would stare and make nasty comments. This one time Njabulo punched this guy who said I don’t have the looks but I have the body and he spanked me.

It’s Friday, tomorrow Bobo and Mel are getting married. Yes they are finally getting married but after so much drama. Bobo punched Mel’s brother when he tried to hook him up with some floozy. Never seen Bobo so mad he was shaking with rage. They are getting married tomorrow and their families are not coming. I’m Bobo’s bridesmaid and no he won’t be wearing a dress. Njabulo will be Mel’s best man. He actually doesn’t like gays but he agreed and he’s trying for my sake. We are busy running around trying to prepare things on time, so that Bobo and Mel can have their dream wedding. Since their parents and siblings won’t be coming it won’t be a very big wedding. We’ll sleep at the venue on the floor because Bobo is worried that we might get late.

Okay we are done, it’s 11pm and they are getting married at 10am at least we won’t be cooking. I wish I was the one getting married. Hey I always forget to ask Njabulo how he knows Mcebo so I turn to him. “Njabulo, I always forget to ask you. How do you know Mcebo?” I ask him.

“Oh shit you can’t be asking about that asshole” Bobo complains.

“No it’s okay. That asshole is my cousin” Njabulo replies. We have nothing else to say so we go over the to do list one more time, before we go to sleep. I have to share my blankets with Njabulo, it is so uncomfortable. I’ve never shared a blanket with a guy except for my dad about 15 years ago, when he thought I’ll be married by now. I eventually fall asleep. When I open my eyes I see the most handsome face in the world even Trey Songz is not this handsome. He looks peaceful, I’m staring at him grinning like a idiot thinking I wouldn’t mind waking up to see this face every day for the rest of my life. I kiss his forehead he stirs and rumbles some rubbish.

“Ncooo” that’s Bobo I thought they were still sleeping.

“I thought you guys were sleeping” I reply shyly.

“No we woke an hour ago, we have been watching you ogling and kissing him” Mel replies pointing at Njabulo.

“This is really embarrassing” I say using one of the blankets to hide my face.

“No need to be shy, I’m glad you’re happy” he tells me and they walk out. I check the time it’s 6am. I have 4 hours so I go back to sleep.

“Vuka (wake up)” someone is shaking me. I open my eyes it’s Njabulo, hmm I’d love to wake up like this. “Thanks, what’s the time?” I ask him.

“It’s 8:30” he replies folding the blankets I stand up and help him. After that we take a shower, not together though. I’d never seen a naked guy, I’d definitely faint.  After showering I wear a long blue dress, tie my hair into a bun. I help Bobo with the check list we go over it 5 times  before he is satisfied, before we know it it’s 10am and he walks down the alter. They look so beautiful, they say their vows I don’t even hear a thing because I am busy staring Njabulo. I think we’re dating because just next week I’m meeting his siblings and I am nervous. Even though I go out a lot and Njabulo, Bobo and Mel always tell me that I am beautiful I don’t believe them. I’ve known them for almost 5 months and I have been told that I am ugly all my life so I still find it hard to believe.

“This is my wedding you know, I’d really appreciate it if you focused on me you know” Bobo whispers in my ear smiling.

We head to the reception. Everything is beautiful the theme is silver and pink Bobo and Mel’s favourite colours. Obvious Bobo likes pink. We spend an hour on the reception then they head out to their honey moon. Njabulo and I pack our things, I drop him off since he lives 30 minutes away from the venue, the same venue I hired for my wedding. Njabulo lives in a 2 room shack. I’ve never been to his place, he never suggested us to. In fact we always met in public. We walk in, he’s a neat freak, at least I won’t have to clean after him in the future, and I’m also a neat freak. His place is very tidy and small. There’s a table and 4 chairs at the centre of the kitchen, a fridge, cupboard with a 2 plate stove and a kettle on top, and a shelf with lots of books, there’s no TV. There’s a 2 sitter couch, a wardrobe, chest of drawers, a neatly made bed and a plastic tub hanging from a nail.

“Feel at home, do you need something to drink” he asks me.

“You’re neat freak yoh. Yes please can I have coffee” I reply.

“Yoh my mom used to beat the shit out of us if we didn’t clean after ourselves” he replies.

“We did everything around the house, we cooked, cleaned and did our own laundry. I always loved cooking so I’d cook for my sisters since they hated cooking so much and they would do my laundry” he tells me.

“Hmm and you are a good cook, your mom must be proud” I reply. We chat for hours and soon it’s time to leave, I hate leaving him. He walks me out to the car and I drive off with a sad smile. At least we’ll talk on the phone. We can spend the whole day together but we still talk on the phone for hours sometimes until one of us falls asleep. I never want him to hang up when he’s feeling sleepy and I sometimes cry if he falls asleep while talking to me. I have fallen for this guy so hard I don’t it’s normal or healthy. I get home and go straight to bed.

I’m meeting Njabulo’s siblings today. I’ve seen their pictures they are all beautiful and I’m afraid that they will reject me like all the people I have met in the past. We decided to go to Pretoria Zoo, I will be meeting them there at 9am. I take a bath, do the bed, I wear a dress Njabulo bought me about a month ago. It’s a grey maxi dress. It’s 7:05 I drive to the Zoo, I can’t see them at the entrance, so I pay and enter they are standing there looking my way. I walk to them shaking I’m nervous. Njabulo walks towards me with a smile like always, doesn’t he get tired of seeing my ugly face.

Okay his siblings look shocked. “Oh so you’re the girl” that’s how one of his sisters greet me, I don’t know how to answer that so I decide to keep quiet.

“So she can’t talk” she goes on when it’s clear to her that I’m not going to answer.

 “She’s so ugly no wonder Mcebo ran the opposite direction when she saw her” says one of the brothers and they all laugh except for one his sisters. Njabulo punches him in the face.

“What’s that for? The truth hurts” he replies smiling. Njabulo takes my hand walking towards the exit. I know what his siblings are saying hurts but I can’t be the reason they are fighting or not speaking to each other. So I wait for him to calm down and beg him to spend time with his siblings, he refuses at first, I keep asking him until he agrees. The quiet girl walks towards us with a smile, she introduces herself as Smanga and she tells me not to mind her siblings, it’s easy for her to say. But I can ignore them I mean what’s new. We go around the zoo they continue making their comments but not enough for Njabulo to hear them, I just thank them like always.  After the zoo we head to the nearest Debonaires they want pizza. They came here with taxis, oh the look they had on their faces when they saw my machine. The whole 20 minutes they are asking where I work, when did I buy my car. I never answer I just keep quiet Njabulo decides to answer them. After Joyce said I’m quiet because I’m a prostitute, why do people hate