Griffin by Rahela Ferarri (smallest ebook reader TXT) 📕

Griffin:  “A new employee of mine actually discovered it.” – There it goes again. An employee. I didn’t want to say her name. Diane would immediately suspect something, and make a connection with the fact that we hardly saw each other ever since I hired her.

Diane:   “He must be very good then. Of course, Doug wouldn’t have hired him otherwise.”

Griffin:  “It’s a she. And I hired her myself. But I agree, I made a good call.”

Diane:   “Please, James, you never do the interviews yourself. I get the picture.”

Griffin:  “Don’t tell me you are jealous.” – She ignored my provocation and continued.

Diane:   “How old is she?”

Griffin:  “Twenty two. Twenty three soon.” –I have no idea why I said that.

Diane:   “Of course I am not jealous, James, I just want you to be careful. Those young girls quickly get ideas in their head.”

Griffin:  “Can we please change the topic?”

Diane:   “Yes.” – She was mad. She wanted to go all the way with it, but she knew that we never referred to this as a relationship. We decided to be discrete and see where it goes.

I never had time for a relationship. I mean “time”. To dedicate yourself to someone and invest your time and effort. It was somehow always easier to get a room somewhere, and not having to wake up next to someone in the morning. My brain is constantly over speeding its limits, and I have trouble sleeping. I wake up at four or five a.m. and just can’t make it stop. And I don’t feel like talking. They all expect more. And I am not a person who could give them more. I don’t have more to give.

It is a very exhausting confession to yourself. I don’t have more to give. Of course, I would want to have a child someday. I see myself having a family one day. But the definition of “one day” was not the same ten or fifteen years ago. My standards have also changed. I need peace. Solitude sometimes. I can’t listen to shallow and stupid things. I am not willing to make a compromise. This woman must sweep me off my feet, if she wants me to open my heart for her. She must make my heart go faster and my brain slower, until there is nothing out there but her. She would make me break my rules for her, and cross my boundaries. And I still haven’t met her. But the scariest part is, that I have stopped looking. My office is my home, and I feel like “one day” is not coming any time soon. It existed in my mind merely as an idea. A thought. A hope.

Image of me wiping the tear from Mia’s face came to my mind. The moment that put me out of my balance for the first time after a long time. When you can get as much sex and excitement as you want from other side, but all you crave for is a soft simple kiss from this vulnerable creature. Who are you?

Diane:   “James! James Griffin, God damn, did you even hear a word I said?!” – She interrupted my thoughts.

Griffin:  “Yeah, sorry, I have this meeting tonight. I’m having a hard time to concentrate. I should probably get ready.”

Diane:   “Will you pick me up when you are done? We can go to your place.”

I already paid the check, and was getting ready to leave.

Griffin:  “Don’t wait up for me. I will be late, since they’ll want me to take them out for a drink after. Besides, I need some information, and a bit of alcohol might help me get them.” – I gave her a small kiss on the lips, and went in a rush. I couldn’t have her sleeping next to me. Something was going on in my head, and I had no way of controlling it. And no time to think about it. I went to get ready for the dinner.

Fieldman was there in time. So were the other men. I took them to a nice restaurant, for a business dinner. There were two other guys from federal reserves, and two more from stock market exchange. After a rich meal and a couple glasses of wine, we switched to more delicate topics.

Griffin:  “We have received financial reports from UniGlobe. Now, we only have a couple of months to assess whether we should make the investment or not.”

Fieldman:”I don’t know. I heard Finley has something to do with it. Actually, it might be a good thing. Finley can return the favor by increasing your Company’s capital. Just imagine what you could do with the money. You already have a fast growth. Imagine the possibilities.”

Griffin:  “I always want to know what I’m investing in. The decision is just too big.”

Fieldman:”Diane is a great lawyer. She already did her job on the subject. But I don’t know. Maybe you should look for another opinion. A fresh perspective.”

A fresh perspective... Maybe I will. Just to test if the first time was just luck. I am sure that it wasn’t, but I would really like to hear her opinion. It is pure magic watching how processes in her head work. Yes, I would definitively include her on the topic at one point.

Griffin:  “Maybe we should continue in a more relaxed atmosphere.”

Fieldman:”Great idea! Let’s go to a club. I can’t sit anymore. Or eat for that matter.”

Griffin.  “Good! Where would you like to go? Any ideas?” – Carl, from Federal reserves suggested a place. It was a relief since I had no idea about nightlife. Evening would usually end in a restaurant, lounge bar, or in a bed with some girl.

Carl:       “There is a great club on the east side. Owner is a friend of mine, so he could leave us the best table there is.”

Fieldman:”Well, great! I know the place. Call him then, and let’s get going.”

Carl:       “There is a great band playing, the best in the city, so I guarantee a good time.”

Fieldman:”Haaa...it’s the singer right? You don’t have to pretend to me.” – Carl blushed a bit, and I had no idea what were they talking about.

Carl:       “Well, no, it’s actually a great place. But she is breathtaking. I love watching her, at least from dozen feet away.”

Fieldman:”A girl who sings is a walking sin. What would I give to have her for a night. I wouldn’t care about the price.” – He was explaining the discussion.

Griffin:   “Did you even try?” – I was laughing.

Fieldman:”There’s no way you can get to her. I mean, she is never among the audience. Just comes, sings, and gets lost. It is strictly forbidden to come near her. But I am allowed to watch, right? Then I go home and wake up my wife for a fuck. She just thinks I missed her that much.” – They all started laughing, and so was I. I could never understand the excitement about a piece of meat. But then again, they are married. Most of them. I guess you always want what you can’t have.

We were breaking through the crowd, trying to get to our table. It really was the best place in the club, because it was next to this runway. Of course, Carl insisted that it was so close to the runway, since the singer should walk on it, and he wanted the front seat row. The band was already playing, so we ordered a bottle of Cristal, and moved along to our table. The crowd was frantic. I couldn’t see anything, because all hands were in the air, applauding and cheering. I saw a girl on the stage, but I could only see her partially. She was in a short leather dress, a fucking black panther. I must admit Carl was right. And the crowd loved her. She ruled the stage.

Carl:                   “There she is. God, just look at her.”

Fieldman:            ”But she’s pretty far away. I can’t see anything.”

Carl:                   “Don’t worry, we are next to the runway. She will get here.”          

Then in a split second she turned around, erotically throwing back her blond hair aside, and her deep blue eyes locked with mine. I felt a dagger twisting my stomach. It’s her. It’s Mia. This fucking wolverine was sitting in the office, fifty feet away from me, every day, and I didn’t have a fucking clue. Heat was overtaking my body, and my palms began to sweat. She was looking at me, breathing fast, and I couldn’t take my eyes off of her. What the hell? Mia?

Carl:                   “Wow, Griffin, look. She is looking at you!”

I couldn’t say a word. I was speechless. Small grains of sweat appeared on her neck, and I got the urge to bite that spot and taste them from her skin. Blood started pumping in my pants. She was staring at me, with fire in her eyes. Confused, but not shy. Not a tiny bit embarrassed. Something about her is different. If I didn’t know better, I would think it was a different person. Not a single trace of this vulnerable dove, whose tears I wiped with my palm. In front of me was this black panther, observing her pray, and ready to jump. I really couldn’t take my eyes off of her. I never met a woman like her. This was all a million galaxies away from all I’ve known. And it hypnotized me. I wanted to have all with her. Never to look at another woman. This was not because she had this “femme fatal” look, but because I was aware that there this thing she had, this combination, was so rare and valuable. Two split personalities inside one body. A brilliant and sharp mind, and a profound kindness that disarmed me from day one. And she was holding my back. She was behind me, and I wasn’t aware of that. Just looking after me. She excelled in her work only because she wanted to deserve my admiration. And she did. I have never wanted a women the way I wanted her. Not for one night, or a week, or a month. I wanted her by my side. Always. I lifted the champagne glass, and nodded with a smile, as a toast, giving her the signal that I recognized her, and that I like what I see. She smiled me back. And of course they all saw it.

Fieldman:           “Damn, James, I can’t believe it! She smiled at you! How do you do that??”

I couldn’t hear them at all. My ears were buzzing from blood flow. And then a very sexy blues song started. I heard it somewhere. “Black Velvet”, I believe. She took a microphone stand and with an elegant catwalk, paced down the runway toward us. I swear, every single men in the room would give anything to have her on the spot. I would too. I felt this enormous jealousy taking over, because I wanted her for my eyes only. Naked. In my bed. She was pacing slowly toward the end of a runway, where we were standing, and put the microphone stand on the end of it. I forgot to breathe. There she was. Standing directly in front of me. Then, she leaned her back against the