Unvanishing pain(INCOMPLETE) by S.J. J. (positive books to read .txt) 📕

the rest of the day.I was always scared whenever the men came, because it always meant trouble for me.I wish i had normal life and normal problems.Like a cheating boyfriend or a backstabbing best friend, but instead i had to worry about getting accidentally pregnant by my dad.I hadn't cut myself since i spent the day at Jay's house 3 days ago.But my depressed state was luring me to the kitchen to find a knife.I would use my razor but Karen took it -_-.So now i have been reduced to using anything i could find.I wish i could talk to Jay and tell him i was sorry for kissing him.My thoughts were interrupted by a light knock on my door.I didn't respond and Lyn rushed in.
Nana a.k.a Lyn: Hey Anna...Karen told me what happened, how ya feelin
Her voice was soothing and sweet and made me want to curl up in her lap and tell her everything.I shrugged her off instead.
Lyn: Well , you don't have to talk about it if you don't want to
I nodded in response and wished she'd go away so i can cry.
Lyn: Did you wear that to school?
She was looking at my grey sweat shirt and matching sweat pants.I nodded again.
Lyn: humph, just like my daughter, to get so caught up in her work that she didn't even take you shopping!And your hair is crying for a perm.*Raking her fingers through my hair* Don't worry tomorrow after you get from school i'm going to handle it.
I didn't have time to decline her offer because she left.I guess it would be good to get out of the house and Izadore out of my head.Maybe a day of pampering would make me forget everything that happened...

***********

Jay

'

I used my time away from school hustling to keep my mind off Anna but that shit wasn't working every second of the day was spent thinking about her, shit even Sonny noticed.
Sonny: So what gotcha caught in yo feelings,puta

?
He asked me yesterday when i skipped school after the kiss.
Me: Nothin' man and i ain't a whore
Sonny:So it's a chica

?Is she fine?
Me: Just get out my business and give me what i need to sell. gilipollas

(Translation:asshole)
Eventually he did but it just made me wonder if Anna could read me like that.That thought made me decide to skip today too. Sonny usually handled the customers at the mall alone, but since I was here I decided to tag along.It always made me laugh when we went to the mall together.I mean, just to see the terrified look on peoples face when they see sonny made me laugh.He was completely harmless to me but in the eyes of others he was a nightmare- a symbol of evil.But i always wondered whether they were scared of me, or sonny.Slowly the mall began to fill with giddy teens meaning school was out.I almost wanted to slap each and every one of them for being so joyful and naive.For having no worries.While i was stuck here wondering if the sitter got Belles on time.Sonny was busy tryna get some ho number.The girl was beyond ghetto making me question sonny's taste in woman.
Me: Man stop being a pendejo

lets go to the food court man.
Sonny: you right all the big booty chicas

always in the food court.
I rolled my eyes and walked into the court.My nose was immediately attacked by different aromas making my stomach grumble.I bought a burger and fries but sonny had to get the hot wings making me regret my decision.I sat and chewed on my fries but now that i had food i wasn't really hungry.
Sonny: Damn mami

looking fine.
I din't even want to see the ghetto ass girl he was tripping over this time.So i ignored him
Sonny: Shit i fuck her moms too.You think i could get s threesome?
Ew. Is he seriously fantasizing about some old lady and her ghetto daughter.I peered up too give him a look but instead i caught myself staring at what he was staring at.Anna.She looked completely different though.I barely even recognized her.Her hair was in an abundance of curls that landed in the middle of her back and clipped by a red bow.Her usual attire of jeans and a sweatshirt was replaced by a short black skirt that curved her ass and a red polka dotted blouse.She was completely converted into a goddess (not that she wasn't before)

.I don't know how long i was staring before she noticed but when she did she simply turned around and took the hand of the woman beside her.
Sonny: Ima go spit game *getting up*
I stopped him before getting up and walking over to her table.
Me: So I'm invisible now? *crooked grin playing on face*
Anna:I don't know you tell me, a conversation works both ways
Me:Exactly why i started one.
We stared at each other for a while before a throat cleared behind me.The woman Anna was with was giving me a death glare but i didn't really care about her opinion of me
Anna: Lyn, this is my classmate Jose. Jose this is Lyn.
Damn.She couldn't even introduce me as a friend.I mean hell, we made out enough for us to at least

be associates.
Lyn: Jose very nice to meet you.
The disapproving look on her face told me other wise.I was wearing a wife beater that exposed all or at least most of my tatts and i could tell the woman didn't approve.But i didn't care about her approval, right now i was trying to get Anna's attention.
Me: Anna,Can I talk to you right quick..?
Anna told the woman she'd be back and followed me outside the food court.
Me: So.. whats up with the make over?
I asked when we finally made it to a secluded area.She pursed her lips and looked down.
Anna:Why is it ugly?
Me:No!I just wondered why you did it.
Anna:It was Lyn's idea..
Me:Who is she to you anyways?
Anna:My so called grandmother
My jaw dropped.The woman looked way too young to have a grandchild.Guess beauty ran in the family.Gosh if Anna ever heard what I was thinking...
Anna:I'm sorry for kissing you
Me:You do realize I kissed you first,right?*grinning slyly*
Anna:I shouldn't have kissed back!
Me:I'm glad you did.
Anna:Why won't you just go back to being mean to me?!
Me: 'Cuz your cool.
Anna:Just leave me alone!
Me: I would but you don't mean it.
Anna:Yes I do!
Me:No you don't
Anna:Yes
Me:No
Annna:YES!
Me:N-O
Anna :Ye-
She was cut off by me kissing her.She didn't respond and pushed me away and slapped me.I just kissed her again but this time she kissed back passionately.I felt the cool metal of my gun press against me as i pulled her closer.You always have to pack heat in this game.Our kiss was interrupted by a loud gun shot that came from the food court.Sonny.I pushed Anna off of me before running down the mall and entering the court.Sonny was making an exit through the window and i looked to see a dead bloody body.If i wasn't use to this I would shit a brick but since i was, I just followed Sonny.


Anastasia

He kissed me then ran.Well,technically the gunshot interrupted our kiss but still,it was the second time he left me after he

kissed me.Shortly after he ran off, the mall was put lock down and officers stormed in and questioned the shoppers. Apparently no one saw anything,but something told the dead body had to do with Jay or his thug-looking friend.Maybe Jay purposely dragged me out the court so I wouldn't see anything.Maybe he didn't like me at all and was trying to distract me.I can't believe I actually liked him!I ignored those thoughts and focused on the problem at hand:someone is dead and Jay is involved in some way.I had to find out what the hell happened and why.Even if it's ugly.

Izadore

Sonny and I made a clear exit through the mall employee parking lot, to my truck.I drove a decent distance before decide to ask what happened.
Me: What the fuck was that Sonny!Anybody could of saw you man!
Sonny: some guerrero sangre

nigga came up in there, tryna run up on me and maybe if you weren't busy trying to get some coño

(pussy), then you could've had my back!
guerrero sangre

is a new Mexican gang in muerte that meant 'Warriors Blood'.Ever since they came in to town, they've had it out for Sonny's dad because he was the biggest supplier in Georgia, a status that they want to change and anyone who works for him is a target as well.
Me:fuck!Should we tell Larry?
Sonny:Naw keep my dad out of it for now,I sent a message when i killed one of their little perros

(dogs).Now let's just see how they respond.
I nodded in agreement and rolled in silence for the rest of the time.when I got home belles was already there so I just laid in bed and contemplated all the events that happened today. Sony was right. I shouldn't have left him for Anna.but it was so hard to stay away,probably going to be even harder now that she's has a little makeover.maybe I just needed to sleep with her 1 time and it'll be out of my system. But what if it's not? What if I actually start to like her?What if it's more than physical attraction?

Imprint

Text: Please dont steal my book im not in the mood to sue!!!Also im a busy person so please be patient with me uploading the book.
Publication Date: 11-25-2011

All Rights Reserved

Dedication:
To all the people out there, who's pain never goes away........